DUMB MEN JOKES

Why are all dumb blond jokes one liners?
    So men can understand them.

What is the difference between Government bonds and men?
    Government bonds mature.

What is a man's idea of helping with the housework?
    Lifting his legs so you can vacuum.

What is the difference between a man and E.T.?
    E.T. phoned home.

Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women?
    When it's time to go back to their childhood, men are
    already there.

What did God say after He created man?
    "I can do better than this."

How do men define a "50-50" relationship?
    We cook/they eat; We clean/they dirty; We iron/they wrinkle.

What is the best way to force a man to do sit-ups?
    Put the remote control between his toes.

How do men exercise at the beach?
    By sucking in their stomachs very time they see a bikini.

What does a man consider to be a seven-course meal?
    A hot dog and a six-pack.

How are men like noodles?
    They're always in hot water; they lack taste and they
    need dough. [and they're limp.]

Why is it good that there are female astronauts?
    So when the crew gets lost in space, at least the
    women will ask for directions.