THE SEVEN SINS OF ESSAY WRITING!

                          by: Diane Salvatore



What lifts an essay out of the slush pile and onto the pages
of a magazine? In ten years of reviewing manuscripts at vari-
ous publications, I can tell you one cardinal rule: A very ap-
pealing essay weds a topical issue with a fresh or passion-
ate point of view. That's why, in the past, such pieces as
"Missing kids on Milk Cartons: What Do I Tell My Child?" and 
"I'm the Breadwinner - My Husband Stays at Home" and "I Love
Delivering Babies, But the Malpractice Crisis Forced Me Out" 
have been picked from the slush pile and published.

   Obviously, individual magazines have differing specific 
criteria in judging essays. And you'll warm an editor's heart 
if you know something about his/her audience and area of interest.
But I can tell you what generaUy doesn't work for any editor.

  Unsuccessful essays often begin with subjects
that are:

    - Too familiar: These ideas are so overworked, so overdone they 
put editors to sleep. Women's magazines, for example, frequently see 
"Romance is back" (or "Romance is dead ") and "What happened at my 
high school reunion." Such topics might even fit the magazine's 
editorial slant, but other writers got to them before you did - many
times. When editors recommend you read the magazine before submitting 
work, they mean read at least two years of back issues.

    - Too personal: "Old love 1etters I found in my attic" and "Why I 
named my baby after my great aunt" are tyical examples seen at women's 
magazines. Generally very passionate, they're written as personal therapy. 
Save them for your diary.
    Or, go beyond your experience. Personal subjects can work, but you 
must make them resonate with broader meaning. lf a relationship problem 
revolves around something unique to your relationship (your boyfriend 
abused your parakeet, for instance), then that's not instructive. But if 
you can argue that the problem is symptomatic of some universal tension 
between the sexes right now, editors will listen.

    - Too preachy: This is the soapbox essay - no specific angle or 
experience to share, but the writer wants to be heard. Such essays are 
strident, prone to sweeping generalizations, and have a range of emo-
tion that runs from anger to fury. "Why I'm for/against abortion" is 
among that category's worst offenders - and repeaters.

    - Too general: These are overbloen, freewheeling musings with no 
special angle or hook. "People have no respect for each other anymore"
would be such a topic. These are also the mass responses to some current 
event - the Gulf War, for instance, or some natural disaster: floods of 
submissions from people with no special expertise talking about the event's 
tragic implications.

    - Too narrow: These pieces don't affect enough of a magazine's readers
or fail to illuminate larger issues that would enhance their appeal.
   I once saw a piece on traveling with an orchestra that the writer was 
pitching to a general-interest women's magazine. Likewise, regional problems
that don't reflect national concerns - such as troubles in the local police 
department due to lack of city funding - will work better for your local 
paper than a magazine with a 4 million circulation.
   Another symptom: trying to make an isolated incident sound like a national 
epidemic, and attaching an acronym to it.

    - Too old or young: These pieces miss the magzine's target age group. 
If the publication is edited for 3O year olds, "My first high school dance" 
and "Raising adolescents is tough" won't fly.

    - Too complex: Some topics, especially complicated legal or medical 
subjects, are just too hard to tell in 700-1,000 words. Such stories are 
occasionally retrieved from slush for development as full-length features, 
but a writer should recognize that potential first and send the editor a 
query for the feature.

    In general, what does work in an essay is a fresh vision about a timely 
issue, a unique experience that will interest a broad spectrum of readers,
or a special expertise you have about a subject of widespread interest. 
Beyond that, there is no formula; in fact, individual voices are prized in 
essays. Anything you can make work - in terms of subject or tone or style
is fair game.