The PatrickSoftware Useless Driver and Disk Waster
                             Version 7.0
             (c) 1992, PatrickSoftware (YES...COPYRIGHT!)

             DOCUMENTATION (Oh, like you really need any!):

INSTALLATION:
     Put USELESS7.EXE anywhere on your boot disk or hard drive.  Then
modify your autoexec.bat to contain a command to execute it.

EXECUTION:
     Just type USELESS7 or USELESS7.EXE ... it's THAT simple!

LEGAL CRAP:
     Don't change it.  Distribute it until your sysops start complaining,
but don't remove ANY files from the ZIP.  The ZIP file should contain:

USELESS7.EXE - The executable
USELESS7.TXT - This file
FILE_ID.DIZ  - Upload file description for compatable BBS's

Sysops: If some files are missing...delete it all.  I want ALL or NOTHING
distributed.

REGISTRATION:
     The $1 registration fee goes toward my college fund so that I can learn
more and make better software.  (I know more than it took to write this
program...so don't think I'm totally stupid!)  Maybe an operating system
is next...hmmmm.
     Actually, I will probably use the $1 on laundry...maybe to pay part of
my phone bill...maybe for tolls on the way home...maybe to buy food...
I can't really guarantee where the $1 will go...but it will be put to good
use!  I can guarantee that!
     Just send your dollar ($1 check...4 quarters...a bill...ten dimes...),
your name, address, computer type, and disk size to the following address:
          PatrickSoftware
          WPI Box 550
          100 Institute Rd.
          Worcester, MA  01609-2280
     Upon receipt of your payment, I will send you a PERSONALIZED program
containing YOUR NAME and your own REGISTRATION # on an 720K 3.5" disk or
a low density 5.25" disk.  I will also cram the disk full of GIFs (no X-rated)
or whatever other stuff I find interesting at the time.  :)  Requests are ok
but I cannot guarantee I have it.
     So REGISTER TODAY and impress your friends.  Tell them that it's a really
advanced program of some sort.  Or you can just use it to show people that
you register all the software you use!  (yeah...somehow I doubt that...)
Just register it ok?  Then you'll have the warm cozy feeling that you did some
good for someone one day in your life.  Life is short...and what else would
you do with that dollar?  I mean, if you're going to buy a new Porsche or
a 586, then that dollar doesn't seem so significant now does it?
     PLEASE?!  PLEASE?  Oh, come on now...PLEASE?!  :)

COMPATABILITY:
     USELESS7.EXE should work with any reasonably recent DOS version.  It is
also semi-SoundBlaster compatable!  To install it for your SoundBlaster, just
use the execution line of:
C:\SB\VOXKIT\VPLAY C:\SB\VOXKIT\SOUND.VOC /Q /X="C:\DOS\USELESS7.EXE"
to your AUTOEXEC.BAT file.  You may have to modify the directories to where
the sound file, VPLAY, or USELESS7.EXE is located.

THE FUTURE:
     I plan future versions of USELESS.  Registered users will get them when
they are available.  There will also be a Macintosh version in the future
because in my personal opinion...DOS is inferior.  Deal with it.

"HOW DO I CONTACT YOU?"
     You can send me E-mail via InterNet or UUCP (UseNet) at:
patrickd@wpi.wpi.edu   or
lazer@lablues.UUCP
     My U.S.Mail address is listed above.  I welcome comments.

Thanks for reading this and not just deleting it!

-Patrick Delahanty
 (CEO, Treasurer, Programmer, Secretary, and Janitor of PatrickSoftware)

(c)opyright September 23, 1992, PatrickSoftware