Chipmunks roasting on an open fire...   All My loving...I will send to you.....  I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK   Mighty Mouse will save the day......   So they loaded up the truck and they moved to Iowa   So they loaded up the truck and they moved to Mexico   There is more to reality than meets the eye          (a short musical interlude) This is off-center I dunno /* I can C clearly now */ "'o.o'" A@R@ R N@R@ I ! D@R@ M/\A@R@ <--Heather Locklear Scratch & Sniff. +++ ATH +++ ATH +++ ATH... Work Damn-it!!! :) s}{-ô][..._iSɻ () - SRո¿s... Okay, where do I sign? ޳޳޳ Generic Tagline !!!teG I sdrawkcaB eroM ehT oG I sdrawroF eroM ehT !Static Attack ! Pass the Bounce !enif tsuj si gnihtyrevE !noitacidem deen uoy ,egassem siht daer nac uoy fI !retupmoc siht edisni deppart ma I !pleH !rorrim a teG !kciuQ "42? 7 and a half million years and all you can come up with is 42?!" "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981 "Could you continue your petty bickering? I find it most intriguing." "DEL *.*" - 100% file compression. "Easy" is easy to say. "Facts are stupid things" - Ronald Reagan "Happiness is a warm puppy." said the anaconda. "He was a man, all and all, I shall not look upon his like again." "Hey, Worf...I hooked Data up to a Modem...Wanna see?" "Hey, Worf...I hooked Data up to a Modem...Wanna see?" "Hmmm, the Force is strong in this one" "I do not think you will accept my help, as I'm waiting to kill you." "I say we nuke the site from Orbit, it's the only way to be sure" "I'm not the one that misplaced the Deltivid asteroid belt!" - Q "If you can't make it good, make it LOOK good." - B Gates "Milhouse, we live in the age of cooties!" - Bart Simpson "The above Statement is absolutely True." --God "Tourist Season" : When it's OK to shoot them. "Ummm, Trouble with grammar have I! Yes!" -- Yoda "Wagner's music is better than it sounds." "Ward, I'm worried about the Beaver." "What makes the Muskrat guard his musk? - Courage!" "What?!? This isn't the Files section?!?" "Yield to temptation, it may not pass your way again." - L. Long "You keep saying that, I don't think it means what you think it means" #@$ffwe99fjaljk ... Hey! Get the cat off the keyboard! #define QUESTION {(2b || !2b)} -- Shakespeare #include #include #include $ not found: A)bort, R)efinance, D)eclare bankruptcy $$$ not found: A)bort, R)efinance, D)eclare bankruptcy. $25,000 Reward! HAVE YOU SEEN THIS ? %TAGLINE% &TheMenWhoHoldHighPlacesMustBeThe1stToStart.. '\o.,@o.+:"/~!v <-- Tagline debris. ( ( ( ((( In Stereo ))) ) ) ) ((( Sorry, so metim esIm is placet hesp aces. ))) (((((((((((((((SURROUND SOUND)))))))))))))))) ((((((((HYPNOTIC))))))))((((((TAGLINE)))))))) ((((((((HYPNOTIC))))))))((((((TAGLINE)))))))) (((((YOU)))))((((ARE))))(((((FEELING)))))(((((SLEEPY))))) ((wrong && wrong) != right) (A)bort (R)etry (I)nfluence with large hammer. (A)bort (R)etry (S)ay Kaddish (A)bort (R)etry (S)hoot the SOB! (A)bort (R)etry (S)mack the frigging thing... (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)*** it? (A)bort, (R)etry, (F)ail, (S)lam fist on desk? (A)bort, (R)etry, (G)rab a stick and kill it (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (C)rash? (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (F)ail, (N)uke... (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (O)verthrow System? (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (S)ell it! (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (S)orry I Asked! (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (V)alium? (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)nfluence with large hammer? (A)bort, (R)etry, (K)ill Noah? (A)bort, (R)etry, (P)retend this never happened . . . (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)crew it? (A)bort, (R)etry, (S)mack the friggin thing (All opinions expressed solely my own) (BEERWARE) If it works, buy yourself a beer! (C) 1992 All Lefts Reserved. (C)ontrol (A)lt (B)ye (Coda)Evil has been dealt a serious blow,but will be back (Dos + Windows + ATM) < OS/2 2.0! (Insert tagline here.) (background here is really a lo-tech .bmp) (dirty look) Im sorry, Im not allowed to argue any more (exasperated) Oh, this is futile!! (horrified) No! Not the Knights who say Ni! (no official affiliation with the above ...) (singing): Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! (starting to chant): Spam spam spam spam... (under my breath) stupid git. ))))) TAKE A MINUTE TO THANK YOUR SYSOP ((((( * DO NOT EAT * * Do you feel Lucky, punk??? * * Don't walk over Grass. Smoke it! * * Greetings pie lover here! * ** ERROR ** Unable to insert witty tagline. ** Insert Obligatory Cute Tagline Here ** *** MUSIC ** IS ** THE ** WEAPON ** OF ** THE ** FUTURE *** *** original tag line *** **** Support your local Sysop **** ******** The first woman Byte Brother ******** ***WARNING!*** Tagline Theft Alarm Active **FLASH** Energizer bunny arrested, charged with battery *---- The Original dBase dGenerate *Four hours* to bury a cat? Yes - it wouldnt keep still. *Generic Tagline* *I want Christina Applegate's panties with her in 'em!* *KA-BLAMM!!* Whatever that was, I hope its on our side *WARNING* Message explodes when deleted! +++ A Waffle Iron, Model 1.65b +++ - FOR SYSOP USE ONLY - Do not write below this line. ----------This Tagline is blank to save space------------ ---Anonymous Tagline ---For it is the doom of men that they forget. - Merlin --==**> Real Programmers Practice Safe HEX <**==-- --T-A+G-L-I+N-E--+M-E-A+S-U-R+I-N-G+--G-A+U-G-E-- --X-- : You are Here -=*[ Blondes - 'nuff said ]*=- -=>Mile High Club <=- -=[ Bink is Great! ]=- -=[ Truth Through Superior Firepower ]=- -={ We Smoked It ! }=- -But I received the operational signal again! ... Nobody notices when things go right. ......<-Stealth Tagline ...and then on other days it just rains. ..with this pain in all the diodes down my... .gnorw og... gnorw og... gnorw og nac gnihton .senilgat gnidaer emit hcum oot dneps uoY .sevlesruO otnI rorriM a erA steP dlohesuoH .tops eht tih t'nseod dna gnillik sseL :THGIL DUCS ///\oo/\\\ There are no more bugs. ///\oo/\\\ ///\oo/\\\ 1 Minute Shut Mouth Worth 1 Hour Explanation 1 if by land, 2 if by C. 1/2: one half the value, i.e.: 1/2, X/2, PS/2, OS/2 ... 1/5 HS Students carry a weapon - the others are dropouts! 100 Common Cents: 1 Canadian Looney. 100,000 lemmings can't be wrong. 1024x768x256.... Sounds like one MEAN woman! 1024x768x256.... Sounds like one mean woman. 11+10=101...???... Get outta here... 12 inches : Taming of the Shrew 186,000 miles/sec: Not just a good idea, it's the law. 186,000 miles/sec: Not just a good idea, its the LAW. 1957 Fortran is introduced 2 + 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2. 2 Bah or not 2 Bah! 2 more payments and this tag is paid for... 2 wrongs dont make a right - but 3 lefts do! 2+2=5... It HAS to, the computer says so. 2.0 is better than 1. 24 hours in a day and 24 beers in a case. Hmmmm..... 24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case, Hmmm..... 2400 city/9600 highway. 29A...The hexadecimal of the Beast. 3 dreaded words: hard disk failure 3 inches Much Ado About Nothing 30 minutes of begging is not considered foreplay. 30 straight hours, What is that ? a metric day?! 33mHz ain't fast enough! 386! The VAX crusher! 4 out of 5 modems prefer it. 42 Is The Answer To Life The Universe And Everything 43% of all statistics are worthless. 4DBYRDS is my Calif License Plate. 4am? Already? Oh no not again!! 50 Days in the Saddle - By Capt. O. Blubalz 50 Yards to the Outhouse - By Willie Makeit 50 Yards to the Outhouse - Distributed By Buddy Madeit 50 Yards to the Outhouse - Edited By Doris Locked 50 Yards to the Outhouse - Illustrated By Betty Wont 50 Yards to the Outhouse - Published By Andy Didnt 50 states, and I had to pick this one... 6 inches : As You Like It 62% of those polled felt polls asked trivial questions. 640K ought to be enough for anybody. -Bill Gates, 1981. 667: Satans neighbor... 668 - Neighbor of the Beast 69, 714, 2112 sex, drugs, rock'n'roll 7 Days without pizza makes one weak... 7 cats is a purrfect number 7 dead and they blame Marine training ... 7.2 on the Sphincter Scale 70% of accidents occur at home; the rest in voting booths 73% of statistics are made up on the spot. 8 of 10 people suffer hemorrhoids. Two enjoy them. 8 years school, $14,000 debt, $26,000 a year! 82.6% of statistics are wrong... 9 out of 10 men who try camels prefer women. 90% of being smart is knowing what you're dumb at. 90% of everything is crud. 95% loser free... And half the sugar. 98% of all constipated people don't give a crap. 98% of all dead owls don't give a hoot! 98% percent of the public do not know what the hell it is... :-) :.::: ::..: ::.::. :..:: This tag-line is in braille < Falcon System > <- You've got the right reader baby. UH-HUH! <-- Look! It's registered! <--- Look Ma... I'm registered! <----------cut here------ <----The information went data way----> <---Look ma!!! NO BETA!!!! <---The data stream went thataway!-----> <--Please put complaints in this box. << CENSORED >> << Reduce - Recycle - Re-use >> <<< Why is this here? >>> <<<<< Thanks, SYSOPs >>>>> <<<<<<< It'll be in v1.2....I promise!!!! >>>>>>> <> <==Hey, I'm Legal!! ++ to continue... ? ? ? ? SysRq! indows cons ice ointers ... heesh Don't Press THE BIG RED BUTTON! < Registered with a Rubber Check! >> M. T. Headed << >>> WARNING <<< - SAFE.SEX is a Trojan! >>>>> Im telling you, they are EVERYWHERE! <<<<< >>>>> What it is the was of what will be... <<<<< >>>>>> Rock and Roll is not a crime! <<<<<<<< >DING!< Thank you, thats it. ? thgir siht si ?o? Quit bugging me. ?O? /\O/\ ?retteb notroN ro slootCP Is ?siht gnidaer uoy era yhW @# oh for *#&!$ sake! *$!#*#!!! TAG THIS! @T@? It's Miller Time! @T@? It's Miller time! A $300.00 picture tube will protect a 10 cent fuse by blowing first. A $500 CPU will protect a $10 surge protector by frying first. A 'language' is a dialect with an army. A .QWK is a Day's Adventure. A 100% right of return both ways. A B B --- Anybody But Bush! A BBSer's telephone bill knows no bounds... A Big Mouth Travels Far. A Blast from the Past! A Closed Mouth Gathers No Foot A Crowded Bar A DesiLu Production A Friend in Need is a pain in the neck. A HARD DRIVE is from Cleveland to Cleveland A LAW rocket beats four Aces! A Lithuanian Left Handed Golfing Assoc. Board?! (grin) A Macintosh a day keeps Apple Happy and Rich! A PC takes guesswork out of it. So does a bikini. A Penny Saved Is A Congressional Oversight" A Philadelphia institution...kind of like Byberry. A QUANTUM LEAP into the past, Bell Atlantic Business Systems Services. A Quinn Martin Production A Royal Egyptian passing wind is a toot uncommon! A SCRATCH? Your arm's off! A Shade Below Neon: not too bright! A Smith & Weston bets 4 Aces! A Tagline a day keeps viruses away! A Tale of Two Zitis -Dickens's cookbook A Thousand Points of Broccoli A VAX is virtually a computer, but not quite. A VERY small joke, ensign... - Spock A Virus?.. Never! A Warriors Drink -- Well that Explains a lot. A Woman is a two edged sword ... driven through your skull A belly button is for salt when you eat celery in bed. A bird in the hand is safer than one overhead. A bird in the hand makes it hard to blow your nose. A bit crooked, Bruce. Where's Bruce? A black hole is God dividing by zero... A bore is a man who, when asked how he is, tells you. A bug is a feature that didn't make it into the manual. A bug is always wrong .... when arguing with a chicken. A camel is a horse put together by a committee. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. A clean desk is a sure sign of a sick mind. A clean, neat, desk is a sign of a sick mind. A clear conscience is actually a bad memory A clear conscience is usually the result of bad memory. A closed mouth catches no feet ! A coin. Good. I will replicate one immediately. - Data A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord A confident manner is important: Computers can sense this! A cop asks for your identification, and you hand him your belt-buckle. A cranck with armor, will never harm'er. A cynic is only a frustrated optimist A cynic smells the flowers and looks for the casket. A day for firm decisions!!!!! Or is it? A day in the life of a message traffic cop... A day without sunshine is like night. A day without sunshine is like night. A dirty book is seldom dusty. A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste. A father is a banker provided by nature. A fault recognized is half corrected. A feature is a bug with seniority. A few rigs short of a full shack... A field upgrade,HAL. We're going to make you IBM compatible. A find is a terrible thing to waste! A fool and his computer are soon parted.... A fool and his money are asked to go everywhere! A fool and his money are some party. A fool and his money are soon elected. A fool and his money are soon popular. A fool and his money is my kind of customer! A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds. A friend in need is a pain in the ass. A good frame of mind . . . but no picture. A good memory does not equal pale ink. A hand in the bush beats two on the bird A hard disk is good to find. A hard drive is more satisfying than a soft floppy! A hug warms the soul and places a smile in the heart. A jerk. A real knee biter. A job is nice but it interferes with my life. A lack of leadership is no substitute for inaction. A lie in time saves nine. A little a'disk & a little a'data A little dab'll do ya. A little greed can get you lots of stuff A little revolution every now and then is good... A living example of Artificial Intelligence. A loaf of bread, a jug of wine and . A long dispute means both parties are wrong. A long time ago in a galaxy far far away ... A lovely little thinker, but a bugger when he's pissed. A macro on the loose...WATCH OUT ! A man can be happy with any woman as long as he doesn't love her. A man has got to know his limitations. A man is as young as the woman he feels. A man is only as old as the woman he feels. A man is only as young as the woman he feels! A man shall be satisfied with the fruit of his mouth A man who steals his neighbor's wife is not alone A man who turns green has eschewed protein. A man without a woman is like a fish without a bicycle A man's best friend is his dogma. A man's got to know his limitations. A man's home is his HASSLE! A means to an end. A mere bag of shells. A message from the depths of Hell! A mind is a terrible thing to taste * A mind is a terrible thing to ugg.. I forgot.. A mind like a steel sewer! A mind like a steel sewer! A monkey was my great, great, great, great..... A naked man fears no pickpocket A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat! A penny for your thoughts; $20 to act it out A penny for your thoughts; $20 to act it out A penny saved is 2.5 grams of zinc alloy A penny saved is a Congressional error A penny saved is a Congressional oversight. A penny saved is a penny stashed away. A penny saved is ridiculous. A pessimist complains about noise when opportunity knocks A physicist is an atom's way of knowing about atoms. A pint of your best plonk please A police state is great, so long as you're the police. A pound of Flex-ex and a blasting cap cures hacking. A product with 'ZERO DEFECTS' doesn't ship! A production of the digitally insane. A programmer's work is never done. A prune is a plum with experience. A response would be appreciated. A rolling stone gathers momentum. A rooster clucks defiance -- but a lawyer.... A rose by any other name . . . A rose is not a rose when it's a brick. A secret prize in every call. A secret. Shhh. Keep it to yourself. Really. Don't tell anyone. A seminar on Time Travel will be held 2 weeks ago A seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago. A seven day honeymoon makes a hole weak ! A seven day honeymoon makes one weak. A shining beacon in an electronic void A short cut is the longest distance between two points. A shroe! A shroe! My dingkom for a shroe! A slotted spoon holds little soup, but grabs a potato. A sonic screwdriver is Vodka and orange juice going Mach 2. A spirit w/a vision is a dream w/a mission A statesman is a dead polititian. We need more statesme A stiff neck usually supports an empty head. A stitch in nine saves time. A stitch in time saves embarassing exposure... A strange new way to show affection. A sucking chest wound is nature's way of telling you to slow down. A tagline goes where? A terrible mind is a thing to waste. A thing of shreds and zatches. A thousand pardons... A tribble a day keeps the Klingons well-fed... A truly wise person knows that he knows not. A veritable river of words A virus is a Daemon with an attitude problem! A waist is a terrible thing to mind.. A warm beer is better than no beer at all A wholesome mind is wasted potential. A wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn. A wise man rules by the stars, a Fool is ruled by them A wok is what you throw at a wabbit. A word to the wise is often enough to start an argument. A yer ago I kudnt spel jeanyus now I are won. A yer ao I kudnt spel progrmer now I are won. A)bort, R)etry, S)wear? A-440 or Fight! AAAAA - American Association Against Acronym Abuse AAcckk!! II''mm iinn hhaallff dduupplleexx ABORTION CLINIC: You Bang 'Em, we hang 'em! ACK and you shall receive. ACME Space and Explosives - We can put anything in orbit!!! ACOUSTIC: What you play pool with. AFTER HOLIDAY SALE; '92 TAGLINES AT HALF PRICE! AH, no you didn't, you came here for an *argument*! ALT1.BBS: Fatal error at F000:DEAD, dropping...(click) ANSI is a person who can't sit still. ARF, ARF, ARF ARF ARF!!! ARRRRRGGGHHH!!!! ... Tension breaker, had to be done. ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH! ASCII and you shall receive --Z. Modem ASCII no questions, I'll tell you no lies. ASCII stupid question - get a stupid ANSI ASCii, ASCii... Ah downhill ski!!! AT&T Sub-space: The next best thing to beaming there. ATM Teller Machine? Oxymoron! ATTENTION ..............Elvis has left the echo. AWWW, come on, just this one last little feature. Aaaahhhhh-CHU! Not Virus, BBS Fever. Abandon all hope, ye who press Enter.... Abolish anal retentiveness! Abolish mornings Abort, Retry, Find another line of work....... Abortion: Loves Labor Lost Absence of evidence is not evidence of absence. Abstain from wine, women, and song; mostly song. Abstain! or Practice Safe HEX! Abstinence is a good thing if practiced in moderation Academy: A modern school where football is taught. Accept no substitutes! Ach, twas a wee monster in the loch. Acid consumes 47 times its weight in excess reality Acme replies. Acronyms: Tools for the profusion of confusion (TFTPOC) Actually it is an interplanetary greeting. Actually, there IS a banana in my pocket... Acupuncturists do it with a small prick. Adam to Eve->'I'll wear the plants in this family' Admit it-- you expected to see a copyright notice here. Advertise your business here, and save! Advice (noun): the smallest current coin. Advice is what we ask for when we already know. Advisor: The guy who told you how to screw up Affix stamp, post office will not deliver without postage. After Midnight, We're Gonna Let It All Hang Down After all is said and done, more is said then done. After they make styrofoam, what do they ship it in? After-math [n], The period following algebra. Age 'n Treachery Overcome Youth 'n Skill. Age Fast - Hire a Consultant! Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill. Age is a matter of the mind. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter. Age is only a matter of years?? Ah Sir, that Tanker is getting away. Ah fart in your general direction! Ah' can SPELL, ah' plum can't TYPE wo'd some hoot Ah, come on, just this one last little feature. Ah, the smell of it... Ah-Ha! Caught you stealing my taglines again! Aha! No, you want room 12A, next door. Ahead of its time..... Ahh wight! Where's my WAM memowy you wascwy wabbitt? Ahh! Come on George, just this one last little feature! Ahhhh..for those longer tags with the register Ahhhhhhhh, I forget what I was going to say. Aibohphobia n. - The fear of palindromes Ain't Automation Great! Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows. Airbags won't help...when this machine crashes! Alas Poor Yorick, I think you're dead Alas poor kiroY, I knew him backwards. Alas! The poor . I knew it well. Alas, a virgin no more: I've lost my Himem... Alaskan nights are 3 months long, can I sleep late? Albania's export is furious political thought Albatross, get your albatross .... Alexander Graham Bell was a 'phony! Algebra: What the Little Mermaid wears Alienation's for the rich. Alienation's for the rich. Aliens have invaded Earth! How else do you explain Dos? Alimony is like buying oats for a dead horse. Alimony? ...sounds kinda like "all yer money" Alive, and simply delighted! All "isms" are really "wasms". All Generalizations Are False, Generally! All I ever think of is hex All I need is some peace & Quiet. If I got a piece I'd be quiet:-) All I want is a LITTLE more than I can spend! All I want is the chance to prove money can't buy happiness All I want to know is: WHY ME? All Scottish food is based on a dare. All WORK and no play......Ain't the ONLY way! All a Borg!!!!!! All answers questioned here. All beginnings are difficult. All dressed up & nowhere to go. All general statements are false. All generalizations are false (this one too) All generalizations are false (this one too) All good things must come to an e All good things must come to an e All government is theft, some just steal less All governments thieve, some just steal less All great ideas have been controversial, at one time. All hope abandon, ye who bounced lots of checks! All hope abandon, ye who enter messages here. All is for the best in this best of all possible worlds. All is true given the right premises. All isms are really wasms. All of life is a war. All of the really good taglines are 1 character too lon All people are not people friendly!!!! All politics is based on the indifference of the majority All right! Another Earthquake. All right, who's been cooking hot dogs in the warp nacelles? All right. (shouting) THE CHURCH POLICE !! All right.... who siphoned the blood out of my cat? All rules have exceptions-except the ones that don't. All seriousness aside.... All stressed out... and no one to choke! All the kookies are not in the jar All the world's a stage... Now it's intermission! All things are difficult before they are easy. All this I cannot bear to witness any longer All this and brains, too! All this beer and only one mouth. All this, and a winning smile, too. All those updates, and still imperfect!!! All true wisdom is found in taglines. All true wisdom is found on T-shirts. All warranties expire upon payment of invoice. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound? All...Who needs a doomsday virus when we have Windows :-) Alms for the poor! Alms for the poor! Alpha testing - CTRL-ALT-DEL, a way of life. Alright! Another Earthquake. Altered days and Blurry ways............ Altzheimers is very ... ah ... umm ... I forget! Always advise against awkward or affected alliteration. Always know where your towel is. Always loses a little bit after its explained Always loses a little bit after its explained Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn! Always remove the last screw first. Always say no and you'll never be married. Always store beer in a dark place Always tell her she is beautiful. Am I a ZAPF Dingbat? V^\_o^o_/^V Am I at Wits End, Or just stuck in my chair? Am I pleased or frightened? Ambivalent? Maybe I am and maybe I'm not ... America trusts us. America's Five Worst Words: Dan, I Don't Feel Well America, where you park on the driveway! American Society for Zero Defects Amiga -> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA Amiga: Yesterday's technology, tomorrow. Amnesia rules - O Amsterdam, the motherland of small rodents An Electrician gets into people's shorts! An Elephant. A mouse built to government spec An Elephant. A mouse built to government specs An Elephant: A mouse Built to Government Standards An adulteress was condemned to the electric blanket. An after debt experience requires use of scissors. An argument isn't just contradiction. An electrical engineer deals with current events An elephant is a mouse with an operating sys. An empty bus travels fast. An equal opportunity flamethrower. An expert is someone from out of town. An honest politician is one who STAYS bought! An idea is a curious thing. It won't work unless you do. An improper mind is a perpetual feast. An informer should be hanged by his tongue. An open mind gathers no dust. An original Tag-Line! An ounce of application is worth a ton of abstraction. An ounce of emotion equals a ton of facts. An ow du I get dis gloo bottle out of my noz? An ulcer is what you get mountain-climbing over molehills An x-spurt is an unknown drip under pressure Anarchy Unlimited Anarchy is against the law. Anarchy, No rules - OK? Anates tuas in acie instrue. And Adam asked "What's a Headache?" And God said: E = mv - Ze/r, and there was light! And Hobbes was fond of his Dram. And I always thought Bonapetite was a small.. And I though this was going to be simple.... And I thought *I* had problems! And I'll try not to sing out of key... And I've got 4,567 archived messages to prove it. And Now for something Really Amazing! - Bullwinkle And THIS is your computer on drugs... And That alone is. And Uncle jerome said,"So shut up already." And WHAT were those mistakes my parents made? And all of the signs were right there on your face And as we wind on down the road.... And have buttered scones for tea. And in the news: Check out the next message. And it's readily apparent that... And it's readily apparent that... And keep your @! dirty words the %!$ outta here And many MILES to go before I sleep. And now a word from our sponsor. And now a word from the NULL device... And now for something completely different... And now here's something we hope you'll really like And now we return you to your (ir)regular conference. And now... The Larch. And of course Henry the Horse dances the waltz! And remember, the early bird who hesitates ... gets wormed! And remember....If you can't beat it......Maybe she will! And remember: Oprah spelled backwards is Harpo! And so it ends? And so it goes! And some fell upon stony ground and had no THC at all. And sometimes the bear eats you. And that's a wrap! And the Cartoon menace was no more.... And the bit goes on... And the number of the counting shall be three. And the plural of house is....CAT.....'Hmmmm' And then Adam said, 'What's a headache?' And then God said, No, a BUD light! And then she pressed the ctrl key... And then the earth exploded.... And then there was one. And there are plenty of opportunities And there are plenty of opportunities And there was much rejoicing. And they saith unto Jesus,"How the @#$! did you do that?" And this 2-record disco set, only from K-TEL! And you ask my why I love her And you hate Taglines? And you thought You's Seen It all? Well, you have... And, as I end the refrain, THRUST HOME! And, they taste like the toilet seats too! And... she was wearing this sexy freudian-slip... Anderson is a common name but 'Chang' is much more common. Angry Candy leaves a bittersweet taste. Animals are your friends. But they won't drive you home. Anita Hill:When sh*t happens,tell everyone 10 years later Ankle deep in the DNA pool ... Anna one, anna two.. hit it boyz... Annual shots will protect FIDO from Disease ! Another @$%^%*&^&* Tagline!!!! Another Bizarre Doughnut Reference Another Bizzare Doughnut Reference Another Politically Correct Reply from ... Another Politically Incorrect Reply from ... Another day.. Another job hopelessly botched... Another day.. Another job hopelessly botched... Another exploration in the black hole of time Another lazy day rolls by and yet I hear no reply... Another victim of Modem Addictus Ansi-Phreak Seal of Approval Answers: $1, Correct answers: $5, Dumb looks: Free! Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free. Answers: $1, Short: $5, Correct: $25, dumb looks are still free. Anthony's Law of Force: Don't force it; get a larger hammer. Antlers in the Treetops - By Hugh Goos deMoos Any given program will expand to fill available memory Any given program, once working, is obsolete! Any offense taken is *only* in the mind of the offended. ;-) Any questions ? Any sufficiently advanced bug will become a feature. Anybody got a magnet? Anybody heard of a meme??? Anybody want to buy a used cold? Anyone can hate. it costs to love. Anyone not wearing 2,000,000 sunblock is gonna have a REAL BAD DAY. Anyone who can't cope with math is not fully human Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. Anyone who remembers the 60's...wasn't there. Anything U can conceive and believe U can achieve. Anything free is worth what you pay for it. Anything free is worth what you pay for it. Anything goes (well, sorta). Anything good in life is either illegal, immoral, or fattening. Anything not worth doing is not worth doing well. Anything once assembled, will fall apart. Anything that can go wr ... #@^% Bus Error -- Core Dumped Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing. Anything you try to fix will take longer and cost more than you thought. Anywhere You Go ... There You Are ! Anywhere's a better place to be... Apathy Error: Don't bother striking any key. Apathy Society canceled due to no-shows. Apathy Society cancelled due to no-shows. Appreciate me now - and avoid the rush. Approved, but not funded. Apt natural. I have a gub. Are beer commercials great or what? Are dog biscuits made from collie flour? Are humans good to eat Daddy? Are part-time band leaders semi-conductors? Are we THERE yet? Are we having fun yet? Are we live or on tape? Are you SURE it's plugged in? Are you a Photometric Polytechnic graduate? Are you a computer friendly user? Are you going to sleep at all tonight?! Are you going to sleep at all tonight?! Are you into casual sex, or should I dress up? Are you out of my mind? Are you part of the problem, or part of the solution? Are you ready for the Lord Jesus to come back? Are you suggesting coconuts migrate? Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate??!? Are you sure the "Insert" key doesn't mean Are you sure? Were not in Kansas anymore, Toto? Are you wearing a condom? Are you wearing a troupe or is that a TRIBBLE on your head? Aren't you Glad you found NetUsers? :-) Argue with yourself and LOSE???-- PROBLEM!!. Aries' ram whenever possible Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle, Arnoldism: Can you open this jar of olives for me. Arsonists of the world, ignite! Art is not to be looked at - art is looking at us. Artery............ The study of fine paintings. Artificial Intelligence: The other guy's opinion. Artificial Intelligence: The other guy's opinion. As I said before, I never repeat myself. As King Arthur said: Some days it all seems so feudal. As U C, I have a fetish for abbr.'s! As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing! As flames run rampant on the net, I state my disclaimer: As for cats being from this planet, I don't think ANY of them are. As long as I'm in charge here, there will be no leaders. As long as its not a _glass_ eye... As my grandfather had said in his last words, A TRUCK! As pure as Jim Bakker himself. As regards computering, Murphy was an optomist. As soon as you realize I'm God, we'll get along fine. As your Doctor I advise you to drink heavily. Ask for it by name. Ask me about my vow of silence. Ask not for whom the Tell bowls... Ask not for whom the bell tolls;let the machine get it! Asphalt: rectal trouble. Astrakhan: The covert art of observing beauty in motion. Astrology is God's science. Astronomers do it with Uranus. At a gas station, ASK ATTENDANT FOR HOSE. At a nude wedding everybody can see who the bestman is. At last! Perot actually makes a decision... At right, I am a licensed cleavage inspector. At the half: Bears 16 - Tourists 0. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. Atoms of the World, UNITE (whoops, too late) Attack long worms from the rear - that is so much safer! Attack of the Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers! Attack of the Killer Taglines (PG-13) Auntie Em: Hate you, Hate Kansas. Taking the dog. Dorothy Aural Sex produces eargasms Autoexec: Snooooozzzzzzze Auuuuuuggugggg. There. I feel much better. Avalanche or roadblock, I was a snowball in hell. Avenge the death of the working class! Avert misunderstanding by calm poise and balance. Avoid Hangovers.... Stay Drunk. Avoid driving a motor vehicle or operating heavy machinery after use. Avoid fire, flame, or smoking during use. Avoid junk mail, get an unlisted ZIP code! Avoid reality at all costs! Avoid reality at all costs! Avoid tunnel vision: Wear blindfold in tunnel Aw hell, just once I'd like to see Picard KILL the alien! Awright, you people! Who stole my strawberry preserves? Awwww its just a Harmless little Tagline! Aye carrumba! No Simpsons conference on this board! B.A.D.D. - Brotherhood Against Dink Doers B.M. = Bowel Movement OR = Brian Mulroney B@ Something is VERY wrong here! B@ This tagline made backwards by Tag O' The Day B@ This tagline made backwards by Tag O' The Day B@ Why can't you see things my way? BABY ON BOARD -just means five more points BAD TO THE BONE I'M BABABABAD TO THE BONE ! BADGERS? We don't need no steenking BADGERS!-- Raul, _UHF_ BASIC By All Standards It's Changing BASIC Lives.... BBS, American style. BBSing is a Maalox Moment BBSing is a fun, relaxing hobby after a hard days work BEEP: This is a test of the Emergency Tagline System. BEER ... It's not just for Breakfast anymore! BEERWARE: If it works, buy yourself a beer. BELA LUGOSI is my co-pilot.. BELL RATES: pay an arm & leg to use an ear & mouth BETA TESTERS WHO LIE! On the next Geraldo... BEWARE - Tagline Thief in this echo BIG Blue ... Yesterday's technology at tomorrow's prices! BITCHENAID - It's like the best mixer, dude. BROADCAST MESSAGE AT 4:45pm. Brain going down. IMMEDIATELY. BTW, FWIW, IMHO, yes. OTOH, AAMOF, maybe not. BTW,"The check is in the mail."Really,it is! No,I mean it! BTW: I'll take 1 dumb look please with a side order of silly expressions. :) BUGS???? I'll get them....STOMP! BUSHPILOTS do it out of sight......... BUY AMERICAN. (This tagline made in Japan.) BYTE ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME Babes are like roads. Baby In the Gas Tank - By Who Pumped Ethel Baby Philosophy - If it stinks, change it. Baby Sitters: girls you hire to watch your Tv. Baby oil is NOT made by squeezing dead babies... Bachelor: one who is footloose & fiance free! Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find Reverse ! Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch! Back in the saddle again... Back off man! I'm a programmer... Back up my hard disk? I can't find the reverse switch! Backing up does not cause severe tire damage... Backup not found....(A)bort (R)etry (S)oil pants Backup not found: (A)bort (P)anic (D)iarrhea. Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (D)etonate Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (F)reak Out! Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic Backup not found: (A)bort (R)etry (P)anic Backup not found: (a)bort (r)etry (p)anic (c)ryalot Backup not found: (a)bort (r)etry (p)anic (s)uicide Backup not found: I might as well kill myself now... Bacteria: Rear entrance to a cafeteria. Bad FAT? My hard disk has high cholesterol? Bad command or file name. Bad command or file name..STUPID! Bad command. Bad, bad command. Sit! Staaay.... Bad habits? I have nun. Bad or missing sysop Bad times for virii -> Badges? We don't need no stinking badges! Baghdad is Arabic for molten glass... Bailiff, whack his peepee! Baker, Swaggart...Only 3 To Go! Bald men don't waste their hormones growing hair. Balls said the Queen,If I had them Id be King Bang! I'm dead! Bang! goes the kanga off the bonnet of the van... Banish me to Babbledegook! No, No! I DID my time! Bankers do it with interest. Bankrupture: A Fiscal Hernia. Banned in 34 countries. Barfingnewgen: German Car Sickness. Bargain Tagline (no message). Barium............ What you do when C.P.R. fails. Baseball, Hotdogs, Apple pie, NRA! Bash any key, and put this puppy out of my wife's misery. Basic programmers never die, they gosub and don't return. Batch files? No, but here's a nice batch of cookies. Batches, batches, we don' need no steenkin' batches! Batman is a menace to society... Batteries not included. Baud, James Baud. - famous British spy/modemer Be American, Buy American - and CHARGE IT! Be Vewy Vewy Quiet, I'm hunting tagwines ! Be a better shrink and the world will beat a psychopath to your door. Be alert - This country needs lerts. Be alert. The world needs more lerts. Be careful what you ask for - you may get it! Be careful when slinging mud, you might lose ground! Be careful with that saw!, Tom said offhandedly. Be creative - invent a perversion! Be excellent to each other & Party On, Dudes. Be nice or be nuked. Be safe. Use a condom. Be safe: Use smoke detectors OR Sleep with a firefighter Be self-reliant and your success is assured. Be suspicious of all native-born Esperanto speakers Be very, very frightened, Arthur Dent. Beam Me Up Scotty, ............*S-C-O-T-T-Y*!!! Beam me aboard, Scotty!" -- "A 2 x 4, Sir? Beam me up Scotty, it just ate my phaser! Beam me up Scotty, no intelligent life on this BBS! Beam me up Scotty. Beans are the musical fruit Bear Whiz Beer : It's in the water thats why is's yellow! Bearded Clams? HAH!! I've never seen one! Beat me, whip me, make me read my mail online. Beat me. Whip me. Make me write bad taglines. Beat on the Brat With a Baseball Bat... (Ramones) Beat the 5 o'clock rush - Leave work at noon! Beautify America - Deport Congress! Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. Beauty is just a light switch away...'click!' Beauty is only skin deep. Ugly goes right to the bone. Beauty without virtue is a flower without perfume. Beaver Cleaver has an edible complex Because SOMEBODY has to do the dirty work. Because it's there. Because nothing else comes close. Become a programmer and never see the world!! Bed her late than never. Bedfellows make strange politicians. Bee Healthy - Eat your Honey! Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. Been through Hell?? and what did you bring me?? Beep! Invalid Input. I take only cash.... Beer can's empty! Memory Full! Zzzzzzzzz.... Beer is Better: Beer bottles don't get sprayed with pesticides Beer is Better: Beer is always in season. Beer is Better: Eating cucumbers to forget doesn't work. Beer is Better: You can't get drunk, no matter how many cucumbers you eat. Beer overdose... SHutting User off till bubbling stops... Beer, Wine and Women --- Is't Life Great !!! Beer. It's not just for breakfast anymore! Beercan Located. Operator Loaded. Before calling Tech Support, ask the Guru Before you attack her, wrap your whacker. Before you start anything, make sure you can finis Behead a Lawyer for Allah! Behead a Moderator for Allah! Beheading: The ultimate loss of face. Behind every argument is someone's ignorance. Behind every great man is his BUTT. Behind every successful man is an exhausted woman Behind every successful woman - herself. Being normal isn't one of my strengths. Belfry: The directory for .BAT files! Bell announces, FREE call waiting*8> Benign............ What you are after you be eight. Bequeath your wheels to some destitute vehicle. Besides, friends don't let friends buy Seagates. Best file compression around! "DEL *.*" - 100% comp. Best for a case of nerves is a case of beer. Best to avoid nightmare; Never argue with your spouse. Beta bashing - a way of life for demented people Beta-testers do it for free. Betcha Bo don't know SALT! Better taglines through confiscation. Better than the Other Leading National Brand... Between cheap and expen$ive is the truth. Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried. Beware of Geeks Bearing .GIF's... Beware of cheap JH Junior imitations. Beware of exploding penguins! Beware of geeks bearing GIFs. Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers Beware of programmers who carry screwdrivers Beware of quantum ducks--Quark, quark! Beware of quantum ducks: quark, quark. Beware of the powermonging InterLink Moderators. Beware the grammar / Spelling Gestapo. Beware the man who fears you. Beware the man who fears you. Beware the shadows, for they are...ARRGHH! Beware! The tagline thief lurks in the depths of _____Net! Beware! I'm armed and have premenstrual tension. Big Brother is watching you! Big or small We tax them all. Bigamy: One wife too many. Monogamy: The same idea... Bigamy: Too many wives. Alimony: Same thing. Bigamy: Too many wives. Monogamy: Same thing. Bigfoot Boogies On Down Bigfoot Goes High Society Bigfoot Makes the Valhalla Scene Bigfoot Puts on the Dog Bigfoots With Dirty Faces Biker Nuns From Hell - on the next Geraldo! Billions and billions served (and lived). Binkley without mail is like a scooter without wheels! Biochemists wear designer genes. Biology grows on you. Bios City, where Fatman leaves his mark! Birdmodem: ZRCHRP Received. Sending SEEDS.LZH Birds of prey know they're cool. Bit Decay!? Yo say ou hve B Day Bit Decay!? Yo say ou hve B Day Bits make bites, but nibbles turn me on! Black holes are where God divided by zero. Black holes happened when God divided by zero. Blackouts are Not unscheduled midweek vacations. Blah, blah, blah... Blame your maker or blame yourself, but don't blame me! Bless me father for I have SIMMed. Blockade?? What blockade??! Blonde: Dumb sh*t happens. Blondes: Legal Handicapped Parking Permits Blood in the Saddle - By the Kotex Kid. Blood is thicker than water, and tastier. Blood on the Hurdle - By Wun Hung Low. Blood's thicker than water; and it tastes better too! Blow your mind - smoke gunpowder. Blowers good, paper baaad... -Dana Carvey Bo Derek thinks we're a bunch of airheads. Bo KNOWS Needlepoint Bodily Functions: Make room for more beer. Body by Fisher - brains by Mattel Bombs don't kill people. Explosions do! Bonds almost instantly! Boogers on the Wall-By the twin writers, Pickem & Flickem Boop Boop Bee Boop - Betty Boop Bore. A person who talks when you wish him to listen. Borg saying: We came. We absorbed. We left. Borland liked dBase so much they bought the COMPANY Born Free....TAXED TO DEATH! Bottle 'o wine, fruit 'o the vine ... Bowman hesitates. You're not IBM compatible. Boy Am I Tired! It Must Be The NET-LAG! Boy! This is Fun and inxepensive too. Boy, am I glad it's only 1971... Boy: A noise with dirt on it. Boycott EXXON... get a horse! Boycott meat - beat a vegetable. Boycott shampoo! Demand REAL poo! Boys will be boys, & so will some middle-aged men. Boys, you have ALL been selected to LEAVE th' PLANET in 15 minutes!! Brain Disengaged; Call Back Tomorrow. Brain damage? No thanks, I have some already. Brain damage? No thanks, I already have some. Braniff ran OS/2 Breaking Windows isn't just for kids anymore... Breast fed: A female FBI agent. Breast size multiplied by IQ always equals 69. Breeding rabbits is a hare raising experience. Brian! Come on, let's go to the stoning. Brighter than Cindi Lauper. But then, what isn't? Bring back Max Headroom! Bring back REAL monster movies! Bring home the bacon? HECK! I Brought the PIG! Bring me my blue soap box. I want to make a speech. Bring order to your life, use random numbers. Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead! Brought to you by ALLGONE-REP Brought to you by High-C, the beverage of Opera singers Brown Spots on the Wall - By Who Flung Pooh Brown Spots on the Wall - By Who Flungdung. Brown spots in the Desert- By Squat and Leavit Bubbles in the Bath - By Verewynn de Bottam Budget the luxuries first! Bug free, cheap, or on time. Pick two. Bugs are Sons of Glitches! Bugs come in through open Windows. Bugs? I just programmed undocumented features! Bugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugsbugs Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will use it. Build a watch in 179 easy steps -by C. Forsberg. Building Bigger and Better Hangovers Bulldozer: One who sleeps through a political speech. Bullsh...I mean, El Toro Crappo Bumper Sticker: 'TO ALL VIRGIN'S THANKS FOR NOTHING'. Bureaucrats are the meat loaf of humanity Burn a flag for freedom Burn a flag=free speech. Burn a cross=hate crime. Burning down the house ! Burp!......(well it COULD have been worse!) Bush.sys corrupt, recommend optimizing politics Bush:like Reagan without the acting ability! Busy Day? Busy? I just spent four hours burying the cat. Busy little fingers leads to trouble... But I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference!! But I received the operational signal again! But I thought YOU did the backups! But I was just getting interested! But I'm feeling MUCH better now! But MOM, it 'really' WAS a virus! But Officer the Tree didn't give way to the Right.. But my little voice TOLD me to do it! But officer, I was only going 10 MIPS! But soft, what light through yonder tagline breaks? But the cow CHIP is organic.... But the initial objective was to drain the swamp! But then again, what the heck do I know! But where's the disposable crewman? But you can sure get nothing for something! Buy American Buy Yugoslavian Wars Bonds! Buy a HST and keep Ma Bell in business! Buy in haste, repair at leisure By Day, Enlighten; By Night, Endarken. By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail. Bytebrothers..children of the ARCLITE! C -- It isn't just for breakfast anymore. C :The power of Asm w/the flexibility of Asm C Code, C Code run, Run Code Run ! *Please* Run Code ! C code run. Run code run! C program run. C program crash. C programmer quit. C'mon over, baby, whole lotta bakin' goin' on .. C'mon, George, tell me about the contras again, George, huh? Huh? C: The power of Assembly with its flexibility C:\> SWEEP ECHO Y|DEL *.* < C:\DOS C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN RUN\RUN\RUN C:\DOS\RUN RUN\DOS\RUN :-) CA Driving: To Change lanes, first pull out your 9mm.. CA Raisins murdered by Cereal Killer! Film at 11. CA, the Granola State - What ain't fruits is nutz. CAN'T UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF FEAR CASH ONLY! We Know Your Kind! CAT: I hope that Schrodinger guy put litter in here... CAUTION--The Users Bite CAUTION: INCORRIGABLE PUNSTER! DON'T INCORRIGE CHASTITY: The most unnatural of sexual perversions. COBOL.....(C)ompiles (O)nly (B)ecause (O)f (L)uck COFFEE.COM not found. Sysop asleep. CON is the opposite of PRO - i.e. Congress and Progress CONFLICT: Answering the mail...Doing the housework CONFUSION ALERT! CONFUSION ALERT! CPU Pickup Line: (p(, (What's your MHZ?) CUESLIX - Pool players favorite cereal Cache me if you can . . . Caches to caches, DOS to DOS... Caesarean Section.. A district in Rome. Caffeine makes the world go round. California does have its faults. Call 911. $3.00 first minute, $1.00 each additional minute. Call Barf Construction, and we'll throw it up! Call for the captain ashore, I wanna go home. Call in, tune up, turn out, hang up. Call me Ishmael. I won't ANSWER, but ... Call me back so I can hang up on you! Call the Liberal Hot Line - 1-976-WEL-FARE ($10 per min) Call the Men of Science. Calling ALL Ansi-Phreaks! Come out, come out! Calling for complex blends of reverse psychology and extreme violence. Calm down. It's only ones and zeros. Camel: A quarter horse designed by a committee. Campus Crusade for KALI! Can God make a rock so big He can't lift it? Can I blame my spelling on Line Noise? Can I go to prison for this? Can I yell "movie" in a crowded firehouse?? Can O' Worms. Open, Heat, & Eat. Ready in 15 mins. Can Pee Wee choose to waive the evidence in court? Can a blue man sing the whites? Can we get loss of liability insurance insurance? Can you believe that thing is STILL moving? Can you repeat the part after 'Listen very carefully'? Can you teach an old SysOp new tricks? Can you teach an old SysOp new tricks? Can't Win, Can't Break Even, Can't Quit Can't find COLDBEER.CAN: SYSOP.EXE not loaded Can't get this drive to backup, forward only operation. Can't live with her, without her, or SHOOT her! Can't see it? It IS there, using Stealth technology. Can't underestimate the power of fear. Canadian DOS prompt C:\EH?> Canadian wildlife found here. Candygram for Mongo. Mongo LIKE candy! Cannot the kingdom of salvation take me home? Cant expect to keep them on the farm after theyve seen Paris. Cap'n, this t'glin dinna' say ennythin! Captain Kirk: We come in peace. Shoot to kill. Captain Pollard.. Renegade ship approc!@$(@#&$* NO CARRIER Captain, a Klingon does NOT play Tetris. Captain, this board seems highly illogical. Captain, we are being hailed. Get out your umbrella. Car pooling - By Sharif d'Ride Cardinal Fang! Fetch...THE COMFY CHAIR! Careful what you think you want, you may get it. Carefully avoid anything said to be NEATO! Carpe that diem sucker! Carpenter's Rule: Cut to fit; beat into place. Carpenters are just plane folks. Carrier Landing - Most Fun Possible with pants on! Castrate - the hotel rate for actors. Cat (kat') n. Dog with an attitude problem. Catch the wave, or don't. See if we care. Catgut [n], My dog got fleas but my catgut kittens. Catholic girls, in the little white dress Catholic girls... send me a dozen! Cats Know Their Rights. Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled. Cause I love my ol' tag... Cause of Death: CRC Error Caution PET XING Caution! - BUG Bashing in progress - Caution! Caution, Student BBS'er at the Wheel... Caution: High Pressure!!! Contents are PKZIPED Caution: Contents under pressure! Caution: This stuff is addictive... Caution: This tagline stops for page breaks. Celebrate Earth Day Celibacy is *NOT* hereditary. Celibacy is not inherited Cement shoes, dirt cheap. Ask for Guido. Cereal port 1 error, frosted flakes NOT found! Cereal port 1 error......... Certified Debugger = VW Mechanic with Inspection License Certified Rocket Scientist Chain Tagline: Now stolen [7] times. Charlie Don't Surf. Chastity - most unnatural of the perversions Check for *.bat's in your c:\belfry\ ! Check your hormones at the door. THANKS -The Management Cheese can be your friend! Chicken - the egg's way of making more eggs. Chicken Little only has to be right once. Chicken heads are the chief food of captive alligators. Chile today. Hot tamale. Chinese restaurant called 'Hung Far Lo'. Chipmunks roasting on an open fire ... Chit chat and drivel unwelcome here Chizboiger, Chizboiger, Pepsi, Pepsi!! Choose your friends carefully - Y. Arafat Choosy cats prefer Microsoft mice 10:1 Choosy users choose GIF! Choosy voyeurs choose .GIF! Christina Applegate Fan Club -- Go Kelly Bundy! Christmas & Halloween confuse programmers: DEC 25, OCT 31 Christmas tag-sale. Handmade gifts for the hard-to-find person. Ciao .. Adieu .. Hasta luego .. Goodbye .. Aloha .. Circular Definition: see Definition, Circular. Circular logic will only get you dizzy. Citation for slow BBS'ing: Going 2400 in an HST lane. City Morgue: You stab 'em, we slab 'em. Civil War Firearms - By Captain Ball Civilization is fun! Anyway, it keeps me busy!! Classes NOW Forming! BIG demand for Petroleum Transfer Enginneers Click ... click ... click ... damn, out of s! Click mousie...Drag mousie...KILL! KILL! KILL! Muwwahahahah! Click...click...click..damn, out of taglines! Climate is what you expect. Weather is what you get. Clones are people two. Close cover before striking. Close your eyes and press escape three times. Close your eyes and press escape three times. Closed captioned for the hearing impaired. Coarse and violent nudity. Occasional language. Code run. Run code run! Coffee not found: (a)bort, (r)etry, (f)all asleep Coffee--the beans from Hell!! Coffin not available. Press F10 to cremate Cogito Ergo Boom == Smart Bomb!!! Cogito ergo spud: I think therefore I yam. Cogito, ergo Hormel - I think, therefore I Spam. Coitus Interruptus. Emission Impossible. Coke or Pepsi....you decide !! Cole's Law: Thinly sliced cabbage Colic............. A sheepdog. College isn't the place to go for ideas. Color slide viewing cures insomnia Comb your hair...you look dreadful! Come closer... a little closer... ulp! Go away! Comfortable truth, isn't. Coming Soon. Mouse Support for Turbo Edlin! Coming Soon: Dvorak's Guide to Offline Readers Coming soon - VAPORWARE III - It's a real gas!! Coming soon to a calendar near you, Monday! Coming soon to a universe near you! Coming soon: EDLIN for Windows. Coming soon: Netware for the Nintendo! Coming soon: New Taglines! Command Interpreter Bad or Missing... Committee: A group that keeps minutes and loses hours. Committee:Life form with six or more legs and no brain Committing suicide in Newark is redundant. Common sense ain't so common Communism is like one big phone company. Communists are now more legal in NYC than Kiev! Compiled by: Complaints? Dial 1-900-CRY-BABY. ($349/min) Complex problems have simple, wrong answers. Complexity isn't the answer-it's the problem! Compliments of the Itty Bitty Machine Company. CompuCrumb SPUDModem Detected; System hanging up now... CompuCrumb SPUDModem Detected; System hanging up now... Compute Safe! Use McAfee! Computer Chat on Vision Cable Ch24 - Weds 7:35pm Computer Geek Modem Romance - On Oprah!!! Computer Geek Modem Romance - On Oprah!!! Computer Make Very Fast, Very Accurate Mistakes.. Computer Make Very Fast, Very Accurate Mistakes.. Computer Science? Army Intelligence? Computer come on line: 'Hey Baby, #########' Computer lie #1: You'll never use all that harddrive space. Computer missing, notify SysOp! Computer models of computer conferences. Computer not found.. (A)bort (R)etry (F)^&K IT! Computer protected by a PIT BULL with AIDS! Computer protected by a PIT BULL with AIDS! Computer,load program 9 -- Execute Computer,load program 9 -- Execute Computer... Smoke... Uhh Ohh Computer: a million morons working at the speed of light. Computers ARE the future. Oh the future looks grim! Computers also eliminate spare time. Computers can never replace human stupidity. Computers can't cook omelettes, even if asked Computers don't get mad...they get even! [FILE NOT FOUND] Computing is a terminal disease..... Conformity obstructs progress. Confuse people: Quote from the wrong message Congenital........ Friendly. Congress is full of crooks, theives and bandits. Congressional National Bank. Ours bounce higher and farther! Conlige suspectos semper habitos. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps. Considered by many. Constant change is here to stay. Constants aren't; variables don't. Constants aren't; variables don't. Constipation - By Sid Ondapott Constipation is the thief of time. Constructive criticism is so rare. Contains less than 2% U.S. RDA for this echo Contents may settle during shipment. Control-Alt-Buy-Sell Conventional wisdom, isn't. Conversation enriches the understanding, Convert your 386 or 486 into a Game Boy, run Windows 3.0! Cookie! Cookie! Lend me your crumb! ... Cooks? what we need are engineers Copy editors do it with style. Copy editors do it with style. Copy from another: plagiarism. Copy from many: research. Copy org.asm+waitand.c+donot.pas loony.bin Copywight 1991 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved. Corazon says: If the Shoe Fits, Eat it. Correct in Thought, Statement, or Action....TRUE!! Cosmetics: preventing men from reading between the lines Cosmic Thing. Could I have a drug overdose? Counselar Troi, please report to my room. Clothing optional. Courteous And Efficient Self-Service. Cover me. I'm going to change lanes. Cover your stump before you hump. Cpl. Paterson is a COWARD! Cranial Input Error: Line Status Register 02 Cranial Rectalitis - the disease of being a butthead! Crash Course In Brain Surgery Crash! P)anic, S)uicide, K)ill bystanders? Crayola presents a new color! TARDIS BLUE!!! Cream rises to the top......so do dead fish. Create your own opportunity. Blackmail a senior exec Created by Female Gynecologists who knew what they were doing. Creativity is the recombination of the elements of life. Creditors have much better memories than debtors. Cremation Place: You Bang 'Em, We Flame 'Em! Crewman Green, step on that rock! Crime does not pay, as well as politics. Crime, Sex, Alcohol, Drugs... God, I love Congress Crime, sex, bouncing checks, gads, I love Congress! Criminal Lawyer is an oxymoron. Criminals are a superstitious and cowardly lot. Cripes, Saddam, I thought you said SHORT oil! Crispy outside, tender inside. Criticism comes easier than craftsmanship. Crop Circles: The work of a cereal killer? Crossing Rivers - By Bridget Fast Cruisin' @ 899,942,400,000 furlongs / fortnight Cthulhu saves--in case he's hungry later Cucumbers are Better: Cucumbers have fewer calories. Cucumbers are Better: Cucumbers won't give you a hangover. Cucumbers are Better: You can eat the whole cucumber, skin 'n' all. Cucumbers are Better: You can open a cucumber using only your teeth. Cum on feel the NOIZE! --Twisted Sister Cures For Impotence - By Hugh G. Rection Current Protocol: None Selected Curses! Flamed Again --me Cut me young, cut me deep! Cut, Paste, Color, Delete... Cute and definitely huggable.....right! Cutting remarks don't cut any ice. CyberSpace Forever! Cyberdine Systems, by which others will be judged. D'you.... d'you want to come back to my place? D.A.M.N. Nude Mothers against Dyslexia DAM: Mothers Against Dyslexia. DAMN, we're good. DANGER! DANGER! Computer Store Ahead, Hide Wallet. DARE to be Kaotic. DAVE - STOP DAVE . . . MY MIND IS GOING DAVE, I REALLY THINK I'M ENTITLED TO AN ANSWER TO THAT QUESTION DELETE TAGLINE.MR DENIAL: [D]on't [E]ven k[N]ow [I] [A]m [L]ying DIGITAL had what? When? DISREGARD LAST MESSAGE DIVORCE = system("echo y | erase \__MINE\*.*") DIVORCE = system("echo y | erase \wife\*.*") DO NOT ADJUST YOUR MIND - the fault is with reality. DON'T GIVE ME THAT,YOU SNOTTYFACED HEAP OF PARROT DROPPIN DOS = Doesen't Opperate Swiftly DOS Tip #213-Add DEVICE=C:\EXXON.SYS to ruin your envir DOS is to OS/2 as a bicycle is to a Mack Truck DOS means never having to live hand-to-mouse. DOS never says "EXCELLENT command or filename"... DOS: Tells a computer what to do with itself! DOS=HIGH? I knew it was on something... DSZ Super8k Xmodem-The good,the bad &the ugly DSZ speed 300 ha ha ha tee hee hee rz -ZZZZZZ DV has a KB mouse: BigFatHairy Deal! Dad, do you suppose Santa has a modem? Daddy! What does UNREGISTERED mean?? Daddy, what does FORMATTING DRIVE C: mean Daddy, what's that weird-looking man doing over there? Daffynitions #46 - Fog: The air apparent. Dahlmer: He doesn't like sex unless its on a plate! Dahmer sing's, My bologna has first name, Dahmer to PeeWee: Quit playing with the food. Dain Bramaged. Dammit Jim, I'm a doctor, not a tagline writer. Dammit, Jim! I'm a meteorologist, not a forecaster! Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Computer Programmer! Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Computer Repairman! Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Detective! Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Navigator! Dammit, Jim! I'm a doctor, not a Telephone Repairman! Damn the documentation. Full speed ahead! Damn, another mutation! Dan Quayle's library burned.....both books destroyed. Dan Quayle: the EDLIN of vice-presidents. Dang! My drive ate the Origin Line... Danger. Serious confusion has arisen. Dangerous exercise: Jumping to conclusions. Darn wizards anyways! Darn! Those palm trees are blocking my view of the Gulf! Darn, No good Taglines To Steal! Darn, my CPU is always craming my CMOS with RAMs Darn. I thought sysoping was a hobby. Darth Vader sleeps with a Teddy Wookie! Data uses Energizers! His mouth keeps going...and going.. Database (n.) more information than you'll ever need. Dave Barry's home away from home. David Coperfield with one P? David Duke - A Nazi in Conservative Clothing! David Lee Roth thinks we're much too loud. Day, Enlighten; By Night, Endarken. Daytona Beach: 'I've fallen.....and can't reach my beer!' De agony of delete . . . ! Deaf? Call 1-800-HEARING for free information. Dear Satan, Give me Drugs - William Bennett Death - nature's way of saying "Slow down" Death is nature's way of recycling human beings. Death is not the end; there remains the litigation - AB Debate is the death of conversation. Debate, rebate, probate - what's the diff?? Deep down I'm really shallow. Default origin line Defeat may test you. It need not stop you. Define Life: Mail. Delivered by Electronic Sled-Dogs.....Woof! Dem bones, dem bones, dem dry bones Democrat: Let's tax this sh*t happening. Denial ain't just a river in Egypt. Depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. Dermatologists make rash judgments. Descriptions of Heaven - By Pearly Gates Design flaws travel in groups. Desk: A very large wastebasket with drawers. Despair: an extra tire in de trunk. Devoted to the study of cat bathing as a martial art. Diagonally parked in a parallel universe... Diarrhea is hereditary. It runs in your jeans! Did DSZ Intend THAT As Documentation ? Did I do an INCORRECT THING?? Did I just step on someones toes again?? Did I make my point yet??? Did I write this drivel? Did Its laser vision scan the fall of silent snow? Did Mr. Bell expect this?? Did somebody fire a phaser in here? Did somebody say 'Mattress' to Mr. Lambert? Did superman check the coin return slot in phone booths? Did you expect mere proof to sway my opinion? Did you install the Write Only Memory? Did you know 'gullible' IS in the dictionary? Did you say MNP means Modem Needs Pizza? Didn't I See Your Picture On a Milk Carton? Didn't I buy a '51 Packard from you in Cairo??? Didn't I meet you in some other hallucination?? Didn't I see you on America's Most Wanted?? Dieting Made Easy - By Ann O'Rexic Difference between a virus & windows? Viruses never fail. Digital Lawrence Welk: A One ann-a Zero ..... Digital circuits are made from analog parts. Dilate............ To live long. Dime: a dollar with all the taxes taken out. Dinner Special, Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00. Dinner not ready: (A)bort (R)etry (P)izza Diplomacy: Saying 'nice doggy'... until you find a rock. Diplomacy: The art of letting someone else get your way. Direct from the Ministry of Silly Walks Dirty deeds done dirt cheap Dis Is My Tagline. Go Get Yo' Own. Right On! Disagreeable, with a little effort you can be impossible. Disco is to music what Etch-a-Sketch is to art. Discretion weaves a tangled web. Dishonest Person -- One who farts & blames the dog! Disk Crash: Abort, Retry, Kill innocent bystanders? Disk Mangler strikes again! Disk crashes! I hate when that happens... Disk write error, please drop dead... Divers do it deeper. Diversity is God's way of amusing himself. Divide Overflow, I failed grade 2 math! Divorce Isn't the Answer. Shoot the Bitch. Do *you* know what Otto Titzling invented? Do Alabama babies have a southern drool? Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep --R.K.D. Do Cheshire cats drink evaporated milk? Do Da, ARCidy Day . . . Do I BELIEVE in the Bible?! HELL man, I've SEEN one!!! Do I always shrug my shoulders? I have no idea... Do I have this thing configured righK Do I hit [Enter] now? Do NOT look into laser with remaining eyeball Do NOT try this stunt on your PC! Do Not Attempt to Traverse a Chasm in Two Leaps Do Quarter Horses have only one leg? Do That To Me One More Time! Do artificial plants need artificial water? Do be do be do - Sinatra Do dyslexic geese fly North for the winter? Do expect me to talk?No, Mr. Bond,I expect you to die! Do files get embarrassed being unZIPped? Do invisible cats drink evaporated milk? Do it today...tomorrow it will be illegal! Do less and accomplish more. Do molecular biologists wear designer genes? Do not answer fools according to their folly...-Pv.26:4 Do not applaud until you have heard the music. Do not believe anything I haven't said Do not disturb -- I'm disturbed enough already. Do not disturb. We're disturbed enough as it is. Do not drop??? Ooopps! Do not induce vomiting. Do not panic! It's only a Sonic Attack! Do not provoke me. Do not puncture or incinerate. Do not remove this tag under penalty of law. Do not respond to this tagline! Do not store at temperatures above 120 degrees. Do not use if safety seal is broken. Do not use while train is in state of Florida Do not use while train is in state of Florida Do not write in this space! For office use only! Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives? Do right, fear no man. Do wrong, fear no woman. Do something stupid again today..... Do something unusual today. Pay a bill. Do something unusual today. Pay my phone bill. Do test tube babies have navels...hmmmmmmmmm..??? Do those who watch over you know about this?? Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law. (A.C.) Do what you will with this , just don't bother me about it! Do you ever get the feeling that the computer is pushing YOUR button? Do you guys know we just passed thru a BLACK HOLE in space? Do you have too much time on your hands.... Do you know JESUS? If so, tell him he owes me $2 Do you know the way to San Jose? Do you like me for my brain, or my baud? Do you plan to run?Like blazes the first chance I get! Do you trust your ROM to make decisions? Do you wear suspenders in addition to a belt? Do you, in fact, have any cheese at all? Docs? Last time I went, I got nasty medicine! Docs? Why would I want to look at the Docs. Nurses are Better :) Docs? Why would I want to look at the Docs. Nurses are better :) Doctor, my brain hurts! Documentation - The worst part of programming. Dodger Good Buddy, Over and Out. Does 'Bad FAT' mean disk has high cholesterol??? Does Charles Yates wear a civil suit? Does Charles Yates wear a civil suit? Does Commander Data have an over byte? Does LIFO-suction work on a FAT table? Does The Little Mermaid wear an algebra? Does Venus have an Earth probe? Does anybody know what's going on? Does anyone REALLY read these stupid taglines? Does beta testing require masochistic tendencies? Does bouncing count? Does our economy move like a cancer now? Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? Does this signature remind you of Agatha Christie? Does your MOM know you're reading this filth? Doesn't look like his mother....could be his sister.... Doesn't she have ANYTHING better to do? Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children. Dog-gone-it Jim, I'm a Doctor, Not a Magician! Dogmas breed litters of stigmas. Dogs crawl under gates, software crawls under Windows! Dogs crawl under gates, software under Windows. Doing away with God (is) to cease to be a man Dolly Parton's Biggest Hits Dolores capitis non fero. Eos do. Don't .gif a Damn about my bad .rep-utation! Don't Ask Me. I'm Making This Up As I go! Don't Believe The Hype...It's A Sequel Don't Drink and Type! Don't Erase it! I MIGHT need it ---- someday! Don't Look Back. Something might be gaining on you. Don't Steal. The government hates competition Don't Steal. The government hates competition Don't Think!!!!! SCHEME !!!!! Don't Underestimate The Power of MA BELL! Don't Wimp Out! Don't ask me; I was hired for my looks. Don't be held back by yesterday's DOS! Try today's OS/2! Don't be so open minded your brains fall out Don't believe everything I say. Don't blame Congress. If I had $600 Billion I'd be irresponsible too! Don't blame me...I voted for myself. Don't care, don't have to, we're the Phone Co.! Don't confuse Growing Up with Blending In! Don't confuse me with facts!! Don't confuse me with facts!! Don't confuse me with facts, my mind is made up! Don't crush that dwarf -- hand me the pliers. Don't do it if you can't keep it up. Don't drink and drive. You might spill your drink. Don't drink and park, accidents cause people. Don't drink water, fish breed in it. Don't drive too close or I'll flick a booger on you. Don't eat meadow muffins. Don't eat the yellow snow! Don't eat the yellow snow! Don't even pretend to be interested in this tagline. Don't even think of putting a tagline here. Don't force it; get a larger hammer. Don't forget the Quid Pro Quo !!!!! Don't get mad, get even. Don't get mad, get even. Don't get me wrong...but I'm right!!! Don't give up your sapience without a fight. Don't hate me because I'm beautiful Don't hate yourself in the morning--sleep till noon. Don't have a cow, man! Try a moose instead! Don't hit me!! I'm in the Twilight Zone!!! Don't hit me, Mr. Moderator,I'll go back on topic.I swear! Don't hit me, Mr. Moderator... I'll go back on topic... I swear! Don't itch for what you don't intend to scratch. Don't just DO something,STAND THERE! Don't just do something, stand there. Don't just lurk there -- say something! Don't just lurk there -- say something! Don't just read - write! Don't leave home without a portable computer! Don't let a fool kiss you or a kiss fool you. Don't let it fool you, it's written in BASIC. Don't let stress kill you off - let someone help! Don't let the Tute Screw YOU! Don't let the Tute Screw YOU! Don't let the bugs byte! Don't let your boss catch you doing this. Don't light a match! Don't look behind you, they're catching up with you. RUN FASTER! Don't look behind you, they're watching. Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire. Don't look now but your fly's open!! Don't lose heart, someone may want to cut it out! Don't meddle in the affairs of Wizards... Don't meddle in the affairs of Wizards... Don't mess with Mrs. Murphy! Don't mess with me. You know how I get.... Don't monkey with my daggit. Don't panic!!! It's supposed to do that... I hope Don't pet Kitty, she's still not dry! Don't pick it, it'll NEVER heal. Don't pick up that phon#!}}{) NO CARRIER Don't play stupid with me... I'm better at it! Don't question authority; it doesn't know either. Don't say we didn't warn you. Don't steal the Government doesn't want competition. Don't sweat the petty things, just pet the sweaty things. Don't take life too seriously, it's not permanent. Don't tell me what kind of day to have!! Don't touch that! Don't underestimate the power of inflation. Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice. Don't waste the whole day - laugh at LEAST once! Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac. Don't worry, I'm fluent in weirdo Don't worry, I'm gong t bckup td!&#~ Don't worry. Be happy. Don't you dare touch that 'ignore' button!! Don't you ever say "$#%@@##" to me again! Don't you ever say '$#%@@##' to me again! Don't you hate it when your boogers freeze? Don't you hate when that happens?? Don't you hate when that happens?? Don't you have something better to do? Don't you want to be a Block too? Dont hide in a foxhole with someone braver than you Dont recall us ... we'll recall you Dont'ja just love $#(*^&(^ine noise? Doris, FOR THE BIRDS, is leading Carol astray :-) Dorothy, we're not in Kansas. Toto! you can speak! Dos: Venerable. Windows: Vulnerable. OS/2: Viable. Double your dipoles. Double your flux. Double your drive space! Delete Windows! Doubt grows with knowledge Doubt grows with knowledge. Doubt is the beginning of wisdom Down the Flagpole - By Dick Burns Dr. Beckett stepped into the QUANTUM LEAP accelerator and vanished Dr. McCoy, I hate your #@!% human guts. Discussion? Dr. Procter sez: If ya got shingles, put 'em on the roof! Dr. Proctor Sez: Beer...it's not just for breakfast.. Drag the Joneses down to your level. It's cheaper. Dragons are soooooooooo stupid!! Draw this Peanut, become a senator. Draw your salary before spending it. Dreadful. Truly dreadful. But you love it, don't you? Drifting farther every day. Drinking Kills Brain cells, But just the weak one... Drinking problem? I drink, get drunk, fall down. No prob. Drip....Drip....Drip! Drive Offensively! - American AutoDuel Association Drive on Parkway.Park on Driveway. America! Drives used below the equator spin backwards, don't cha know. Drop the gun, Tom said with a disarming smile. Drop your Carrier! We have you surrounded! Drop your carrier ... we have you surrounded! Drummed to Death - By Dee Bugit Duh, who put the lights out? Dum spiro spero -- As long as I breathe I hope Dumb luck beats sound planning every time. Trust me. Dumb questions are better than smart mistakes! Duplicate file name or file not found - Not sure which During sex I fantasize I'm someone else -- Richard Lewis Dust-balls - The cheap man's tribble. Dyslexia rules KO. Dyslexic Agnostics Society Discussion Topic: Is Dog Dead? Dyslexic Atheist's believe 'There is no Dog' Dyslexic Christian sells soul to Santa...News at 11 Dyslexics have more fnu. Dyslexics of the world, untie! E = mc 2 dB E Pluribus Unum really means 'Get the hell off my Foot' E-mail from the edge. EARTH...If You Love It, Leave It<- ENIGMA - A point to ponder! ERROR LPT1 not found.. use backup - PENCIL & PAPER ERROR READING C: (A)bort (R)etry (I)mmolate? ERROR finding COLDBEER.CAN Sysop not loaded! ERROR: Incompatible File Format ERROR: RUM&COKE.DRK unexpected EOF... Operator Loaded ERROR: Your baud rate has been dropped to 300 bps. EVERYTHING seems to make MY body grow twelve different ways! EZ come... EZ go SLMR come... He stay! oppps OLX Each call contains only ten calories... Eagles fly, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines! Eagles may soar, but Weasles aren't sucked into jets Eany Meany Jelly Beany...The Spirit's are about to speak. Earning money would be fun if it wasn't so taxing. Earth is 98% full... Please delete anyone you can. Earth: mostly harmless. East Side Abortion Clinic: No Fetus can Beat Us! Easy Street is a blind alley. Easy as 3.141592653589... Easy credit, terms available... - Satan Easy credit, terms available... --Satan Eat any good books lately? Eat healthy, exercise regularly, and die anyway. Eat my Jockey briefs. Eat properly, get lots of exercise - and die anyway. Eat prunes for that "get up and go" feeling! Eat the rich--the poor are tough and stringy Eat the women ---Axl Rose Eat the young! Eds Radiator Shop:The Best Place in Town to Take a Leak. Edward Scissorhands has jock itch! Eeny Meeny Jelly Beanie, the spirits are about to speak. Egotist: more interested in himself than in me. Eh what? Eh, What's up doc? Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped. El Kabong! Electricians do it until it Hz. Electricians do it untill it Hz. Electricians do it with a charge! Electronic Latrine, or Philosophic Melting-Pot? Elegant Frankfurter - A haute dog Elephant - Mouse Built to Governent Specs Eliminate all ethics from your diet. Elvis is dead and I don't feel so good myself. End of Message - Stop reading. Enee, Menee, Minee, HEY MO!!! Energizer Bunny released on bail of 30,000 NiCads. Energy derives from both the + and negative Energy derives from both the + and negative Engineers are better by design. English is wonderful, used correctly Englishman Say: Bird in bed worth two in bar. Enjoy life ... moderation is for monks! Enjoy life, you will never get out alive. Enlightenment is only a state of mind. Enough research will tend to support your theory. Enquiring minds already think they know! Enquiring minds couldn't care less! Enquiring minds want to know! Entered @TIME@ on @DATE@ Entropy isn't what it used to be. Entropy requires no maintenance! Environmental condoms;y'want paper or plastic Environmentalists -- modern LUDDITES! Equality......when's it coming? Er, how 'bout 'Biggles Combs his Hair'? Er, how about 'A Sale of Two Titties'? Erno Rubik couldn't figure us out. Error #0001: COSMOS.CFG Corrupt. Reboot Universe (Y/N): Error #1511: Brain Offline Error (11): Fax Modem Not Responding, Check Hardware Error 141: Too many errors. Error 144: Bit bucket overflow. Error 256: Programmer Deleted. Error 99: Dead mouse in hard drive. Error : (A)bort (R)etry (S)ell it Error Reading Drive C: (A)bort (R)etry (S)ledgehammer Error finding REALITY.SYS -- universe halted ... Error loading GOD.SYS (A)bort or (U)nzip BIGBANG.ZIP. Error locating COLDBEER.CAN SysOp not loaded! Error reading FAT Table...Try Skinny one ? (Y/N) Error reading REALITY.SYS - Universe halted. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue. Etc., etc., etc. Etched in an eccentric impulse! Eternity? Straight ahead, turn left at infinity Ethel the Aardvark goes Quantity Surveying. Ethernet: A device for catching the Ether Bunny. Euphemist minces words, neologist mints his word Evangelists do more than lay people. Eve was made from Adam's Rib - a cheaper cut of meat Even a hawk is an eagle among crows. Even if you understood women - you'd never believe it! Even the dullest candle burns brighter in the dark. Even the smallest candle dispels the darkness. Even weeds have needs... Ever get the feeling someone is watching you? Ever notice that Legos aren't biodegradable ? Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? Everthing put together falls apart. Every absurdity has a champion to defend it. Every day I do my best for one more day. Every day is starting to look like Monday. Every day is the dawn of a new error. Every man is the stem of his own bloom. Every new generation is a fresh invasion of barbarians. Every silver lining has a cloud around it. Every solution breeds new problems. Every time I have all the answers, someone changes the questions! Every time I lose weight, it finds me again! Everybody do the Michigan Rag! Everybody lies about sex Everybody lies about sex Everyone has a scheme for getting rich that will not work. Everyone has a scheme that won't work. Everyone has photographic memory, some don't have film! Everyone hates me because I'm paranoid. Everyone is GIFTED. Some open the pkg. sooner. Everyone is entitled to my opinion, just ask me... Everyone is entitled to my opinion. Everyone is entitled to my opinion. Everyone's gone to the movies. Everything I do is needlessly violent and enormously irresponsible. Everything I have is HUMUNGOUS! Especially my imagination Everything I say is true, and thats a lie Everything here is right, but it could go wrong. Everything in excess! Moderation is for monks. Everything is a lot like something else. Everything is just a thing Everything looks better in COLOR! Everything put together falls apart. Everything starts as someones daydream! Everything that's important has already been said! Everything usually goes wrong at once! Everything usually goes wrong at once! Everything you know is wrong! Everytime I lose weight, it finds me again. Everywhere You Look...(at least around my office) Evil is the root of all money. Buy bonds! Evil won't kill us; apathy & lethargy will Evil...wicked...mean...and nasty!!... Evolution: God's way of issuing updates Excuse me for butting in, I'm interrupt-driven. Excuse me while I bang my head against a wall Excuse me while I crouch down here 'ahint my asbestos shield... Excuse me worker, I'll just be a nanosecond. Excuse me, I have to recharge my flamethrower. Excuse me, while I change into something more formidable. Excuse the spelling, I have been snorting to much code. Excuses: I'm too full. Excuses: I'm too tired. Excuses: I've got to get up early tomorrow. Excuses: N: Not tonight, honey, I've got a headache. Excuses: You mean you didn't bring any [insert favorite brand]? Execute program code from Write Only Memory! Exercise ? I would rather be space walking ! Exercise is anything that makes you breath hard. Exhibitionists love Windows Experience is directly proportional to ruined equipment. Experience is nothing but a lot of mistakes. Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want! Experiencing Synoptical Difficulties, Please Stand By. Experiments should be reproducable, Experiments should be reproducable. Expert - Someone who knows less, but makes more money. Expert - anyone from out of town. Explain counter-clockwise to someone with a digital watch Explode into pieces, you source code -- Asreil, programme Exploding Windows....GOOD Exploding Drives......NOT GOOD!! Exploding piglets!!! My god, it's raining bacon! External Storage - Wastebasket. Extinct species will never be Born Again. Extremism in anything is. Just extremism. Exxon - greasing the coastline for smoother boating! Eyeing little girls with bad intent... Eyes open, mouth shut, safety off. Ezz beeg trouble for moose and squirrel.. F u cn rd ths, u cn gt a gd jb n cmptr prgmmng F-117...the sound of freedom. FAT TABLE CORRUPT. Please lose weight. FEAR: False Evidence Appearing Real. FIGHT CRIME SHOOT BACK! FIRMWARE: Hardware that is starting to melt. FLOPPY JOES: Home computer addicts FORD: Found On Road Dead. FORVAL MODEMS, A Glance Into The Future! FROG,n. An amphibian with edible legs. Fact need not be multiplied beyond necessity. Fact: Most criminals were raised by heterosexual parents Fact: fourteen out of every ten people like chocolate. Facts are obstinate things. - Joseph Stalin Fahrvegnookie: (n) sex in a Volkswagen. Fahrvergngen! Say the word! HUH? Failure is never fatal and success is never final. Fake it till you make it. Fall Not In Love, It Will Stick To Your Face Falling asleep at the keyboard is called a head crash. Falling lenses are attracted to rocks Fallopian tube - part of a television. Familiarity breeds contempt - and children Familiarity breeds familiarity. Familiarity breeds. Famous last words: 'You saw a WHAT around the corner?!' Famous last words: Don't worry, I can handle it. Famous words, "Trust me, I'm a consultant." Fanatic: Can't change his mind; won't change the subject. Fancy that .....I most certainly DO! Farfignewton - a long way 'till the next cookie.. Fartvergngen..the pleasure of breaking wind. Fascinating, Captain! - Spock. Faster than a speeding ticket! Faster, Cheaper, More Efficient - Modems or Wives Fat, drunk & stupid is no way to go through life Fatal System Error: (A)bort (R)etry (G)et OS/2 Fate is just the weight of circumstances... Fate protects fools, small children, and ships named Enterprise. Fax and ye shall receive. Fear is only another form of awareness - Charlie Manson Federal Law Prohibits the removal of this tag Feel folded, spindled or mulilated, call... Feel good? Don't worry; you'll get over it! Feel lucky???? Update your software! Feet smell? Node run ? HEY , you're upside down! Females have PMS, I have SRH, Sperm Retention Headaches Feminine Protection? A chartreuse flamethrower? Feminism: It's because of men that sh*t happens. Fer sell cheep: IBM Spel chekker. Wurks grate. Fidonet Flamers have uncontrolled vowel movements... Fight on for ol' SC! Figures don't lie, but liars can figure! File Not Found. Backup Not Found. Sure you don't want a drink? File cannot be copied onto itself. File not found "LIFE.DRV", life halted. File not found, I'll load something *I* think is interesting. File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N) File not found....Now you're in the DEEP doodoo! Filet Mignon: An opera by Puccini. Filth & profanity tolerated here! Finally both Oars in the Water - Floating Finally, a liberal opposition! Find Jesus? I didn't know he was LOST! Find out what you do not do well and DON'T DO IT Finish your backup, and later on we can have Ice Cream! Fire In The Hole Fire, Mr. Worf! Firemen like things HOT! First shalt thou pull out the Holy Pin First thing we'll do is kill all the lawyers! First you take a leak. Fish and Tempura vegetables being BATTERED! Five is right out. Fjord [n] - A make of Norwegian automobile. Fla Come on vacation, return on probation Flamethrower not included... Flick Lives! (my wife told me to use this...) Flocks of pigeons! There will always be an England! Floggings will continue until morale improves Floppy Joe: Home Computer addict Floppy not responding, Format HARD DRIVE instead? Y/N ? Florida: Come on vacation, leave on probation Flying saucers are real. The Air Force doesn't exist. Focus? When's the Picture? Fog is an extremist. Fold and tear here. Tape closed before mailing. --- Folks playing leapfrog must complete all jumps. Folks who like Macs usually got a deep discount. Follow the yellow rubber line ... Followed by the explosive harpoon Food .... a wonderful thing to waist! Food is so expensive, anyone who burps is a liar. Football players have odd shaped balls. For Dessert? I'll take a piece of cherry 3.14159! For Rent: 6-room hated apartment. For Sale. Diamonds $20; microscopes $15. For Sale. Eight puppies from a German Sheppard and an Alaskan Hussy. For Sale. Three canaries of undermined sex. For Sale: Dehydrated HO - $14 per quart For THIS I bought a computer? For a funny quote, call back late. For a good time call 911. For a good time, call 1-800-3IBMOS2 For a good time, type FORMAT C: For a nun buying clothes may be habit-forming. For a snark is a boojum, you see. For a snark is a boojum, you see. For every action there's an equal & opposite criticism For further discussion. :-) For great wrong doings there are great punishments For it is the doom of men that they forget. - Merlin For once I'm at a loss for words. Mark down the date! For some Reason, reality is an illusion. For that rundown feeling - jaywalk. For the captain ashore, I wanna go home. For the millionth time, don't exaggerate! For the non-discriminating, non-judgemental, psychotic, all around Nut. For the times...they are a'changin'.... For these prices, you can't expect real quotes. For they are subtle and quick to anger. For those 'special' times... For those who choose to BBS with the very best. For those who have better things to do with their time, but don't care. For want of the price of tea and a slice... For want of the price of tea and a slice... For warm boot, put computer in dryer for 20 minutes. For what it's worth!!!! For what it's worth!!!! For when you're tired of choosing the lesser of two evils. Forecast for tonight: Dark Forensic Scientists always know who's been there! Forest fires prevent bears. Forget RTFM..., Phone the Author at home! Forget the Joneses.... I can't keep up with The Simpsons Forgive us, for we know not what we do. Not that we CARE or anything. Form emptiness, emptiness form. Format C: Kills software bugs dead. Format Hard Drive: (Y)es, (O)k, (F)ine with me Formatting Forty-two, said Deep Thought, with infinite majesty and calm. Four minus two is one and the same. Four-poster bed, 101 years old. Perfect for antique lover. Fractionation--1/3-world country. Frailty, thy name is Seagate. Frankly my dear, I don't give a download! Free Sex is all I can afford after Taxes!! Free and single again! Free bank with the purchase of any toaster. Free communication, free thought! Freedom isn't cheap and it never goes on sale. Freedom isn't free. Freedom, like crabgrass, keeps popping up Fresh from the Box. Friction is a drag. Friend or Foe?????????????????? Friendly fire - ISN'T ! Friends come and go. Enemies accumulate. Friends don't let friends drink and post. Friends don't let friends use DOS 4.xx! Friends don't let friends use Prodigy. Friends don't let friends use Windows. Friends don't let friends use Windows. Friends, Romans, countrymen, lend me your s! Friends: People who dislike the same people we do. From The Valley of The Dulls - Lehigh Valley, From here to there and back From the Department of Redundancy Department From the Desk of the Happy Hacker... From the J.S. Bach Planned Parenthood Center From what I've tasted of desire... -- Frost Full retro-thrust and ten degrees starboard!!! (Or, something....) Fully compatable with everything, past, present, or future. Fundamentalism means never having to open your mind. Funnier than Johnny Carson, but then again, who isn't? Funny, only sensible people agree with me. Further, higher, faster, onward, upward... G'day, Bruce! Oh, Hello Bruce! How are you Bruce? G.I. Series....... Ball game between soldiers. GCC 2.0 is to C as SVR4 is to Unix. GET A CLUE. Cost. 50 cents! GET A LIFE. Cost. 50 cents. GET REAL! Elvis is DEAD! Accept it! GET SLACK! GIF at 11! GIF'S, The GIF That Keeps On GIFFing GOD is Real... unless declared as an Integer GORBACHEX: Popular Russian Breakfast cereal GROWL the SNORT GRUMBLE possessed GRRRRRR bbs ROOAARRR! GST - Go South Turkey! Shop in the States! GST- Government Screwing Taxpayers GUI: Gross, Undesired Interface GUI? Don't step in it! GUN CONTROL......the ability to hit what you aim at! Gaack is always best when served live Gaakk..it's not just for breakfast anymore! Galactic Intelligence Test #1. Avoid contact with humans. Gamblers take heart! Capital gains tax is over. Garcon! Take this grenade to the chef- very quickly, please. Garlic is good for you! Gasp, someone else got thru the busy signal! Gather 'round like cattle and ye shall be herd. Gay community in Calgary selling Fruit Cakes to promote "Gay awarness week" Gee Wiz, I didn't know DOS is that stupid! Gee whiz, Madonna, what a neat concert! (barf) Gee, Mr. Wizard! Aren't nuclear reactors dangerous? Gee, there must be hundreds of em! -- Carl Sagan, age General Brain Failure. (A)bort, (R)etry, (I)gnore, (O)h, sheesh! General stupidity error reading drive C General stupidity error reading drive C: Genitalia is NOT an Italian airline! Genius does what it must; Talent what it can Genius has its limits...Stupidity DOESN'T! Geochronologists will date any old thing. George Bush spelled sideways is O, he buggers George Bush: the EDLIN of Presidents. Geraldo Rivera wants to do a live special about us, but we know better. Geraldo Rivera: Genetic experiment gone bad? German for bra-Holdsemfromfloppin. German word for constipation, Farfrompoopin! Gesundheit - The answer to the common cold Gesundheit! Get OS/2 2.0 - the best Windows tip around! Get it? -- Got it. -- Good! Get me my rubbers....my feet are soaked ! Get on the telephone!!! --Dr. Gene Scott Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours. Get the Legion Of Doom on Iraq's computers! Get thee down. Be thou funky. Get thee down. Be thou funky. Get up in the sky where they can't find you. Get your OWN quote, dammit. This one's MINE. Get your mind out of the gutter! Also pick mine up please Getting better - not older! Getting up early is hazardous to your health Gimme the chance to prove money can't buy happiness Gimme, a match, I think my gas tank is empty. Girl by the whirlpool, lookin' for a new fool... Girl who douches with vinegar, walks around with sour puss Girl who rides bicycle, peddles ass all over town. Girls, girls, girls! Give Me a Cookie! Give happiness/Deserve happiness. Give me a break! I'm a PR major--none of this science and math stuff here. Give me some chocolate and no one gets hurt! Given an open book exam, you'll forget the book. Glaucoma Patients Need Legal Marijuana! Glittering generalities! They are blazing ubiquities. Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever... Go Ahead, Make My Day... Go Forth and Backup! Go ahead, Moderate my day. Go ahead, jump. 100,000 lemmings can't all be wrong. Go ahead, moderate my day-PUNK! Go ahead, steal my ideas...everyone else does... Go ahead. Dake my may. Go ahead...MAKE MY DOWNLOAD!!! Go away or I'll taunt you a second time! Go straight to the docs. Do not pass GO. Do not collect $200! Go where no man has gone b4! The ladies Bathroom! God Made Whiskey to keep the Irish from ruling the World! God corrected her 1st mistake, by creating Eve. God is Dead - Nietzsche ::: Nietzsche is Dead - God God is HERE, Let Us Celebrate! God is real, unless declared integer. God save the screen! God told me it's none of your business. Jimmy Swaggart. God, I hope he isn't a schmuck like the others. Going back to the origin is called peace... Going the speed of light is bad for your age. Going where no NC has gone before! Going.....Going.....GONE.........! Gone Chopin, be Bach in a Minuet.. Good Programmers type copy con Program.exe Good WHAT? really is the way to a Lady's heart Good day to avoid cops..crawl to work. Good lawyers can get sodomy reduced to following to close Good morning! Is an opinion, not a greeting. Good morning, I'd like to have an argument, please. Good morning, Sir.Welcome to the National Cheese Emporium Good night, Mrs. Calabash, where-ever you are! Good tea. --Nice house. Good times end too quickly. Bad times go on forever. Good, Fast, or Cheap : choose 2 of the 3 Good, Quick, Cheap. Pick any two! Goodbye, Mr. Bond! Goooood Morning Iraq! Gorba-chef -- What's he cooking up now? Gore-tex: byproduct of the Texas chain saw massacre. Got DOS 3.3? Downgrade to 4.01 TODAY! Got Kleptomania? Take something for it! Got it straight now? Good. Got the sex duh-rive ... driving 'm mad ... Gotta love me...I'm the baby. - baby dinosaur - DINOSAURS Government Intelligence - Another OXYMORON! Government is a burden on the people. Graduate of the Darth Vader School of Personnel Management. Graduate of the Mad Max School of Defensive Driving Grammarians never die-they fall into a comma. Grass growing from sidewalk cracks never turns brown. Grass is nature's way of saying 'High!' Graves dug to custom fits. Gravity doesn't suck, the earth does. Gravity: Not just a good idea. It's the law. Great Dames for sale. Great Gobs o' goose grease! A computer Great minds always meet at infinity. Greed is good! Greed is right! Greed works! --- Fajo Greetings from Hell....wish you were here. Grep me no pattern and I'll tell you no lines. Grippe............ A suitcase. Gross: Living in the basement of an outhouse! Ground water? Do you mean crushed ice? Grow up? Naw, I'm gonna be a Sysop. Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. Growl for me. Let me know you still care. Guess I will have to turn on my 'Ira Filter' Guess retain files, or any other key to reformat C: Gun Control means using 2 hands Gun Control: A criminal's best friend. Gun Control: Being able to hit your target. Gun the man down, I say gun the man down... Guns don't kill people off-line readers do. Guns don't kill, bullets do. Guns don't kill. Fast-moving projectiles do. Gutta cavat lapidem non vi, sed saepe cadendo. Gypsy dwarf escapes jail: Small medium at large HD Crash: (P)anic, (S)uicide, (K)ill bystanders? HD Recovery: see online documentation.... HEALTH TIP #1: Never Agree to Trading Stools in a Gay Bar! HELLO, everybody, I'm a HUMAN!! HELP ME! MY BRAIN!!! I JUST DROPPED IT! AAARRGGGGHHH! HELP, I'm being held prisoner by this BBS. HEY LOOK, Ifixxedthat spacebarproblem. ohdarn. HIPMOTIZE!! HS/Link users get it coming and going! Ha! and you thought you had heard them all! HaHaHaHaHaHa..my eyes are filled with tears. Hack? I like to call it appropriate..... Had this been an actual emergency, your spleen would have melted. Half a loaf is better than no rest at all. Half a mind is a terrible thing to waste! Half wits talk much but say little. Halleluja! Put your HANDS on the MODEM! Ham on rye ... a drunk radio operator! Hand me that solar-powered flashlight... Hand me the glass. (clink) No, the other glass Hand-me-down clothing, also known as sharewear Handwritten on a condom machine; 'This gum tastes funny' Hang together or Hang Separately Hang up already. Hang up the phone, Scotty, there's no intelligent carrier down here. Hangnail.......... A coat hook. Hangover: the mourning after the night before Happiness Is Mandatory....Are you Happy ? Happiness can't buy you money. Happiness is Being A SysOp... Happiness is a BIG hard drive! Happiness is a full backup. Happiness is a loud belch. Happiness is a warm modem. Happiness is oweing the IRS $50,000 when you die Happiness is twin floppies. Happiness is usually measured in GigaBytes. Happiness is wanting what you have. Happy as a Pig in Mud! Hard DISK? Gee lady, I misunderstood you. Hard Drive Crash? Dial 1-800-YOU BURN .. Hard Work never killed anyone, so why chance it? Hard disks never die... HA! Hard hat area!!!!! Hard work never hurt anyone--but why risk it? Hard work won't kill me but I'm not taking any chances. Hard-learned lessons are remembered longest Hardware: The part you kick. Hardware: The part you kick. Hardware: The part you kick. Software: this you corrupt! Harry, keep the change... Has HELL frozen over yet? Hapinesew screws loose. Otherwise ok! Hapineroom temperature IQ. Has anybody ever found Waldo? Hapta la vista, Baby! Have 8-track, Will Travel. Have YOU totaled a Ford ... Lately? Have a Happy HAPPY:-) Have a Husky day: 30 below and 5' of snow! Have a Nice Day ! Have a great day in spite of everyone! Have a nice day!" "No thanks, I have other plans." Have screwdriver will fix. Have universal translator, will mumble! Have you actually tasted an airline toilet seat? Have you crashed your Windows today? Have you cursed your software developer today? Have you drug tested YOUR legislators today? Have you drug tested YOUR legislators today? Have you ever felt like a tester? Have you ever had to finally decide... Have you ever tried looking at the stars through a squirrel? Have you got anything without spam? Have you hugged your Sysop today? Have you hugged your chipset today? Have you hugged your computer lately? Have you seen my mind? It wandered again. Have you tried on your smile today? He ain't heavy; he's a Shareware Author. He does the work of 3 men: Moe, Larry & Curly He is almost a statesman. He lies well. He is no lawyer who cannot take two sides. He knew the precise psychological moment to say nothing. He that knows nothing, doubts nothing. He was as tough as a two dollar steak He was the most... Human He who dies with the most TAGLINES wins! He who dies with the most software WINS! He who dies with the most toys... is -still- DEAD! He who fart in church, sit in pew He who fishes in other man's well, often catches crabs. He who flies by seat of pants should not eat prunes! He who has, worries; he who has not, longs. He who hesitates goes after me. He who hesitates is constipated. He who hesitates is last. He who hesitates is lunch ! -- OOP He who is not busy being born, is busy dying. He who laughs last is probably your boss. He who laughs last probably doesn't understand the joke. He who laughs last probably made a backup. He who laughs last probably made a backup. He who laughs last uses OS/2. He who lives by the sword is a regular cut-up! He who oppresses the poor shows contempt for their Maker He who plays with self, pulls boner. He who worships Divine Duck will soon sing swan song. He'pinesew fries short of a Happy Meal. He'pinelumberjack, and he's okaaaaaaayyy..... He's dead Jim. Grab his tricorder. I'll get his wallet. He's dead Jim. You get the tricorder, I'll get his wallet! He's either dead or just very sleepy. He's got a magnet! Everybody stand back! He's not 'ere, Bruce. Blimey, it's hot in here, Bruce. He's not exactly operating on all thrusters. Head cheese - it isn't just for breakfast anymore. Headaches are all in your mind! Heads, up Boise! Incoming spuds! Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which you can die. Hear about the two maggots making love in Dead Ernest? Heaven Holds a Place for Those who Prey Hell hath no misery like a backup ignored. Hell hath no pizza (probably no Thai restaurants, either) Hell is kept warm with profane burners. Hell with the lid off...BYTE BROTHERS! Hell with the lid off...BYTEBROTHERS! Hell's just had bad P.R. now where's my 1000 suntan block Hello dad...I'm in jail and I LIKE IT here! Hello good evening and welcome, to BLACKMAIL! Hello, I am part number ޺۳ݳݳ Hello, I must be leaving! Hello, Suicide Hotline, Please Hold.. Hello, is this the party to whom I am speaking? Hello, my serial number is޺۳ݳݳ Hello.. Incontinence Hotline.. Can you hold? Hello....Incontinence Hotline....Can you Hold Hello?? Anyone home?? Help I've fallen and I can't reach my BEER !!! Help me Norton, Help help me Norton.... Help me! I'm rusting!!! Rusting!!! Help stamp out flaming ducks. Help stamp out philatelists. Help stamp out unfriendly conference hosts! Help stamp out, eliminate and abolish redundancy! Help the economy today...Go out and Buy something! Help you out? Certainly. Which way did you come in? Help! I'm addicted to s! Help! I'm trapped in a town without a deli! Help! I've fallen and can't reach my beer! Help! I've fallen off line and can't hang-up! Help! I've fallen on the floor and I'm rolling! Help! My computer is holding me prisoner... Help! My keyboard is stuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk Help! Save my walrus! Help!!me the apples are chaseing me?? Help, help! Im being repressed! Help--I'm being held captive by my modem! Here Fido, Fetch. Get the stick Fido. Stick, Dumb Dog. Here I sit, in a tizzy; all my favorite boards are busy Here'pine tagline you have never seen before! Here'pine. Here'pinequarter, call someone who cares. Here, have some of mine, PLEASE! Heredity is what sets parents of a teenager wondering about each other. Heredity: If your parents had no kids, you won't. Heresy lays foundations for progress. Hes not the Messiah . . . hes a very naughty boy. Hex Dump" - Where Witches put used Curses? Hex Dump: Where witches put used curses? Hey Harry, what the hell'pineJAMF?? Hey Norton.. I have a SMALL problem... Hey Rocky, Watch me pull a rabbit out of my hat Hey Underpants, I'm talking to YOU! Hey! Don't pick up that phoׯች NO CARRIER Hey! I hear there's a 'MODERATOR' coming soon. Hey! This Really Works! Hey! Watch where you aim that thing! Hey! Who took the cork out of my lunch? Hey! Your Trakball is upside down! Hey!! That was funny. Did you hear... Hey, *we* care. Now get off the &*^@#! line! Hey, Doc, got anything I can take for kleptomania? Hey, I was 'testing' it for 3 years! Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a tagline out of my hat. Hey, my (fill in the name) doesn't have a 16550 UART! Hey, my (fill in the name) won't connect with anything at 9600! Hey, what's this ALT-227 thing for? Hey, where can I get a father board? Hey, who spilled coffee on my ? Hey, who spilled coffee on my keyboard?! Hey, you got a problem buddy??!! Hi Ho, Hi Ho, it's Hand Grenades I throw! Hi June, how's the beaver? Hi Windows 3.0, bye Windows 3.0 Hi! I am a disabled .signature virus. Hi! I'm your quote for this evening... Hi! I am a .signature virus. Copy me into your .signature file to join in! Hi, I'm Chip. Micro Chip. Eight-o-three-eighty-six! Hi, my Goldfish looks just like yours!" Hi, what would you like with your fries? Hi-Ho Hi-Ho, its off to the institution I go! High insurance rates are what killed dinosaurs. High message: 943432. Message you last read: 59. Hind sight is always 20-20. Hindquarters special of the day !Bring buns ! Hindsight is an exact science. Hire a teenager while they still know it all. Hire teenagers while they still know everything. His wife hurt herself making dinner yesterday - frostbite History is a set of lies agreed upon by the Victors. History repeats itself because nobody listens. Hit me, I'm a lawyer... Hm! She is made of harder stuff! Hmmm, Maybe I should have read this one! Hmmm... What's this red button foNO CARRIER Hmmm...Is this TAG on? Thump Thump Thump Hmmmm... Now where did I park my Hard Drive Hobbes did it, Mom! Hold a hard drive to your ear. Listen to the C: Hold the Mayo. Hold tight, we're in for nasty weather. Hold tight, we're in for nasty weather. Hole in The Mattress - By Mr. Completely Hole in the Bed by I Missed Her Completely Holy Razor blades, Batman! That was a close shave! Home Sweet Home Home is where the computer is plugged in. Home of the Mc. Billions and Billions served. Home of the Superconducting Kitty Collider. Home sweet home..the place everybody should work... Homework time limit exceeded. Auto logon in effect! Honest Ma, I got it from a toilet seat... Honest teacher. A virus REALLY did eat my homework! Honest, Officer! The dwarf was on fire when I got here... Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense. Honey quiet playing Mahjongg,I have to work.. Honey, get out the whips and chains... company! Honey, what's 'Formatting C Drive' mean? Honey,just one more message...I really MEAN it this time! Honeymoon: The time between 'I do' and 'You'd better!' Honk if you Hate Rap Music. Honk if you feel better than James Brown Honk if you like obscene gestures! Horn busted! Watch for finger! Hot Fudge Sundae falls on a Tuesday this year. Hot damn we're cooking now. Hot enough to boil a monkey's bum! Hot water Heaters: Hot water needs heating? How about a little peel & squeal at my place? How about them apples.... How am I driving? --- 1-800-EAT-SHIT How come all you guys sit on your helmets? How come the AT&T symbol looks like the Death Star? How come this jacket they gave me doesn't have sleeves? How come wrong numbers are never busy! How did I get here from there? How did I get round from eating square meals? How do I set my laser printer on stun? How do I turn the other cheek without getting up? How do frogs die ? They Ker-mit suicide. How do frogs die? Ker-mit suicide How do you attach a tag line so it'll stay? How do you cure a woman of nymphomania? Marry her. How do you determine the sex of a computer? How do you get 1000 babies into a Volkswagen? A Pitch Fork. How do you keep a turkey in suspense? How do you kill a fag? A put a mole in his hamster cage. How do you know it's summer in Seattle? The rain's warmer. How do you make Windows faster? Throw it harder! How do you spell RELIEF? DISK_SPACE! How do you spell relief? OS/2! How do you straighten a bent pipe? Bend it! How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink? How does Teflon stick to pans? How is this for diplomacy----Shoot them all! How long before we're as dumb as computers? How many babies can a motherboard have? How many weeks in a light year? How much does it cost to ride an IO bus? 2 Bits. How much is that wookie in the window? How much wood did Peter Piper pick.. no, wait.. How much wood did Peter Piper pick... no, wait... How the deuce d'you deduce that? How to defend yourself against a Banana. How ya going to do it? IBM Blue it! How you look depends on where you go. How you look depends on where you go. Howd'ya hide money from a Hippie? Put it under the soap! Hozone; Where 1 sock in every load disappears to! Huh? You mean I can't send mail to myself?? Humanity prefers comfort over truth. Humbled again by overlooking the obvious Humpty Dumpty had too much egg nog to drink... Hungry? Out of work? Eat your foreign car! Hypocrisy is the Vaseline of social intercourse. Hysteria ... ^%#)%^@{]@!]|%#@+ I *could* be arguing in my spare time. I AM IN TOTAL CONTROL,but don't tell my wife. I AM NOT CONCEITED! I JUST HATE MORTALS. I BOOTED my computer. Broke my toe! I C what you mean. I CAN'T go to hell, they don't want me. I Call My Horse Flattery Because He Gets Me Nowhere. I Came, I Saw, I Left. I Came, I Saw, IRAN I Can Bitch, I Voted, Can You? I DID read the manual... I DON'T EAT ANYTHING WITH A FACE! I DON'T SPEAK FOR ANYONE INCLUDING MYSELF! I Don't Want The World, I Just Want Your Half. I Don't do windows. ...I don't have the time! I FEEL MUCH BETTER NOW. I Feel Better Now. I Feel Good. I Feel Better Than James Brown. I HATE it when it does that! I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOYED THE RIDE.... I Have The Best Tagline But Ran Out Of Space! I Like to help you out,which way you come in? I Love Animals......They're Delicious! I Love Toxic Waste I NEED Kirstie Alley's home phone number. I Only See In Infrared. I REALLY DO I REALLY HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE TYPE IN ALL CAPITAL LETTERS I SWEAR I thought she was 18! I Saw better conversations in alphabet soup. I TAUGHT MY DUCK TO SAY ".QWK .QWK" I THOUGHT I WAS WRONG O N C E! (but I was mistaken) I Think I know why they're called roach clips,POT holder was already taken I Xeroxed a mirror. Now I have an extra Xerox machine. I [] My Cat. I [] My Dog. (Would you [.] my wife ?) I [] My Dog. I [] My Cat. I [] My dog. He [ate] My Cat. I ain't broke, but I'm badly bent! I ain't broke, just badly bent! I always have parts left over when working on my car! I always tell the truth. Even if I have to lie to do it. I always use the goodest English. I always wanted to be a procrastinator, but I kept putting it off... I always watch my speling;sintax, grammer & pointuation I am Locutus of Borg, this tagline is irrelevant. I am NOT a criminal --R. Nixon I am NOT a merry man. -- Worf I am That, you are That, all this is That. I am Yogi Bear's Greatest Fan! I am Yogi Bear's Greatest Fan! I am a mental tourist, My mind wanders! I am committed--or should be. I am firm. You're stubborn. He's pigheaded. I am firm. You're stubborn. He's pigheaded. I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally. I am he as you are me and we are all together I am he as you are me and we are all together. I am immortal, at least till I die. I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. I am not a crook. -- R. Nixon I am not a molecule, I am a free radical! I am not a pornographer. I don't even own a pornograph. I am not antisocial. I'm just not real friendly. I am not responsible for advice not taken! I am not sincere, even when I say I am not. I am not young enough to know everything. I am not young enough to know everything. I am schizophrenic, and so am I. I am so smart I make myself sick. I am so smart I make myself sick. I am still in testing, wait until I am released. I am the root of some evil...send some money. I am tolerant of your (fruitcake) beliefs I am tolerant of your (fruitcake) beliefs. I am waiting for my winning Lotto ticket I am waiting for my winning Lotto ticket. I avoid cliches like the plague. I backed up my hard drive... and smashed into a bus! I believe in L. Ron "Mother" Hubbard. I bet she does, I bet she does, say no more, say no more, I bought an internal modem, but I can't swallow it. I bought some batteries, but they weren't included I call things as I see them; If I didn't see them, I make them up! I call things as I see them; If I didn't, I make them up! I came. I saw. I stole your tagline. I can SPELL, I just can't TYPE worth a hoot ! I can count even higher if I take my shoes off. I can do 2 things at once & I'm not confused . I can eat that taco with 6 squirts of hot sauce. I can help; my fees are reasonable. I can name that file in TWO bytes! I can resist anything but temptation. I can resist anything but temptation. I can trace my s back 8 generations I can't be out of RAM; I still have hard disk space left! I can't be overdrawn! I still have checks left! I can't believe my computer's on fire. I can't believe my computer's on fire. I can't decide between EDLIN and WordPerfect 5.1........ I can't diet for medical reasons, it makes me HUNGRY! I can't go to no stonin' today! I can't go to no stonin' today! I can't hear you over all this line noise! I can't help being me...I was born this way. I can't help it -- I'm a lawyer. I can't help it, it's my nature. I can't pretend a stranger is a long awaited friend. I can't remember if I used to know that. I can't remember where I parked my Hard Disk I can't use Windows. My cat ate my mouse. I cannot afford to waste my time making money! I cna ytpe 300 wrods pre mniuet!!! I could be chasing an untamed ornithoid without cause... I couldn't possibly fail to disagree with you less. I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lava-try. I cut down trees, I skip and jump, I didn't do it! It's really San Andreas' fault! I didn't get the documentation for the manuals! I didn't know fish HAD fingers !!! I didn't lose my mind; it's here somewhere. I didn't write that! It sounds more like Shakespeare! I didn't write this; a very complex macro did. I do the work of 3 men. Curly, Larry, and Moe!!! I don't care about apathy. I don't do Windows, but OS/2 does. I don't get even, I get Odder!! I don't have a solution but I admire the problem. I don't have a solution but I do admire the problem. I don't have any HIDDEN prejudices! I don't know what I like, but I know what art is. I don't know where I'm going, but I'm on my way! I don't like money - but it quiets my spirit. I don't like sex on the telly. I keep falling off. I don't mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy. I don't need directions. I need HELP! I don't recall running for this office. I don't steal s - I replicate them. I don't think Mr. Ranger is gonna like this, Yogi... I don't think so - Homey the Clown I don't think so. Homey don't play dat. I don't think we're in Kansas anymore, Toto. I don't wanna work,I wanna bang on the drum all day. I don't want a toaster. I don't want it now, I want it RIGHT now! I don't want it now, I want it RIGHT now! I don't want to be a cynic, but it's hard... I don't want to be literate, I just want to program I drank WHAT?!? - Socrates I drink, therefore I am. I drive way too fast to worry what foods will kill me!! I failed my blood test! I didn't study. I feel like a fugitive from the law of averages. I feel much better since I gave up hope! I feel the NEED for SPEED!! I forgot all about the Amnesia Conference I forgot where I left my short term memory! I fought the (fjords!) and the (fjords!) won. I fought the lawn and the lawn won... I found my thrill on Blueberry (Anita) Hill. I get the news I need on the weather report. I give it 95 for the beat and 98 for the lyrics... I give up, what is the meaning of life? I got a Motie in my eye. I got an HT for my wife... Good trade! I got bread and butter, I got toast and jam ... I got lost in thought. It was unfamiliar territory. I got mercury poisoning, it's fatal & it don't get better... I got no prob with "Bob" I gotta bad feeling about this... I hacked mainframes before there were pc's! I had a handle on life ... then it fell off! I had a thought, and I lost it.. nothing new. I had it out with my friend -- Pee Wee Herman I had one just like it ... only different. I hang around where the grass is greener... I hate Microsoft. Bill Gates is the Great Satan. IMHO. I hate Saturdays I hate it when that happens! I hate self-referencing tag lines, like this one... I hate these BLINKING s!! I hate these things. I have 100 GB of software, All on 360K floppies! I have NOT lost my mind. It's on disk somewhere! I have a YEN for things like that I have a crank to start my car. She drives me to work,too. I have a firm grip on reality. Now I can strangle it. I have a list, they will never be missed ... I have a photographic memory. What's your name again??? I have a speech impediment . . . my foot. I have a stu-stu-stu-stu-stu-stu-stutter! I have an important role as a bad example. I have an open mind: My brains keep falling out! I have but three enemies: fear, anger, ignorance. I have come here to kick ascii. I have got a disk ache ! I have how many macros?!? I have more quotes than most people have BRAINS, proving SOMETHING. I have more than enough of almost everything. I have never been hurt by anything I didn't say. I have no idea what I'm doing, but I'm doing it well. I have no mouth, and I must burp. I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. I have not yet begun to byte! I have nothing to say, but I can say it loudly. I have seen the evidence. I want DIFFERENT evidence... I have seen the truth and it makes no sense. I have that file, it's right he........ I have the greatest enthusiasm for the mission - HAL 9000 I have the heart of a young boy - in a jar on my desk. I haven't had sex in so long, I forget who gets tied up! I haven't lost my mind, its backed up on tape somewhere. I haven't lost my mind. It's backed up on tape somewhere. I haven't lost my mind; it's backed up on tape somewhere! I havent lost my mind its backed up on tape.. I hit my CRTL key but I'm STILL not in control.... I idiot-proof my programs,but along comes a bigger idiot. I is knot dain bramaged!!! I just LOVE quoting!!! I just _adore_ this ! I just bought a cured ham. Wonder what it had? I just fade my voice out like this and cue... I just forgot my whole philosophy of life!!! I just found the last bug! I just got a hard drive and can't do a thing with it. I just got a new car for my girlfriend....Great trade.... I just got pulled over by the L.A.P.D. and boy am I beat. I just had my entire INTESTINAL TRACT coated with TEFLON! I just injured a groin muscle; & it wasn't mine! I just keep my eyes closed and hope the best I just need enough to tide me over until I need more. I just stepped on a factoid! - Zippy I just tested out my pit bull. Ever heard a mime scream? I just took an IQ test. The results were negative. I keep putting off procrastination & get nowhere I killed an ant, now all my relatives are afraid of me. I knew Doris Day before she was a Virgin! I knew it was a bad crash, when the FAA called. I know a good tagline when I steal one. I know a heartache when I see one. I know a heartache when I see one. I know and I know you know I know. I know it all. I just can't remember it simultaneously. I know my mind. And it's around here someplace. I know someone with the exact same name! Really? Who? I know something Bo doesn't! I know the combination to your locked baud rate.. I know the combination to your locked baud rate.. I know this is off-topic, but... I know this ship like the back of my hand.. - Scotty I laughed, I cried, I fell down,... I left my s on my 486. I like my coffee black... as a moonless night. I like the 486 tower. Does it come in red? I like to enter messages from the Asylum computer. I like to leave messages *before* the beep. I like to press wild flowers. I like to reminisce with people I don't know. I like to sit and think. Mostly, I just sit. I like to skate on the other side of the ice. I live in my own world... Peaceful visitors welcome... I lost a button hole today. I love MITTs! (Mexicans in Tank tops!) I love Standards, there are so many of them! I love it when a tagline comes together I love running Windows! NOT! I love the smell of napalm in the morning! I loved her butt I left her behind. I lurk quietly and carry a big OFF/ON switch. I made wine out of raisins so I wouldn't have to wait for it to age. I make my own reality..... I may look busy,but I'm just confused! I meant what I said --- I think. I mentioned my 'Hard drive' and she giggled expectantly. I multitask. I read in the bathroom! I must have a mind like a steel seive! I must stop here... my fingers are hoarse. I mustanottagottalotta sleep last night. I need a Phillips Screwdriver. All of mine are Stanley. I need all the help I can get! I need all the help I can get! I need everything; do you have it?? I need to know, I need to know, I need to ... I neutered my cat. Now he's a consultant. I never could remember punch lines! I never promised youinerose garden... I object to sex on TV, I keep falling off! I often quote myself. It adds spice to my conversation. I only drink to make other people seem interesting. I only drink when I'm alone or with someone. I only wish my mouth had a BACKSPACE key! I owe, I owe, it's off to work I go... I parked my Hard drive, and now I can't find it! I parked my hard disk - and got a ticket! I parked my hard drive and it got towed away! I passed my ethics course. I cheated, of course... I plan to live forever, or die trying. I played poker w/ tarot cards-got a flush & 5 people died. I plead not guilty by reason of computer-induced insanity. I plead temporary insanity. ;-) I posted my joke. I prefer 'Indiana', We named the DOG Indiana! I pulled the finger...and she sank... I put on women's clothing, And hang around in bars. I qualified for Raw Bits! I quit drinking/smoking/& sex once. Very boring 15 minutes. I read so much about risks of drinking, I gave up reading I read the DOC's...is this English? I really said "NO! I refuse a battle of wits with an unarmed person. I remember now / I remember how it started. I remember when Saturns were rockets, not cars. I resemble that remark.... I said MAYBE and that's final! I said a BUD LIGHT - Joan of Arc I said copy the disk - not Xerox it! I said it! Oh! I said it again! I saw a subliminal advertising executive, but only for a second. I saw it on the radio. I see no reason to stand here and be insulted. - Spock I see that your second lobotomy finally took hold. I see youiSam's and raise you two weasels. I see your .44 and raise you a GAU-8A. I see your GAU-8A and raise you two SA-9 Gophers! I see your GAU-8A and raise you two SAMs! I seen you do the dog, I seen you gettin down. I seen you do the dog, I seen you getting down I shall digitize or die !!! I shot an arrow in the air... And it STUCK! I should have BBSed all night... I show a clear pattern of unpredictability. I smashed a Window and saw... OS/2. I smell smoke... I sped up my keyboard & I can't keep up with it! I spilled spot remover on my dog. He's gone now. I started a joke, which set the whole world crying I still don't remember, why I hated it. I stumbled over a stone and took it for granite. I suffer from C R S ... Can't remember sh-t I suppose I'm really, really interested... I take my pet lion to church every Sunday..He has to eat. I think I see a tag line comming... YEP. I think I think, therefore I might be. I think I think, therefore I think I am. I think. I think I will plan being spontaneous tomorrow I think I'm gonna, Barf. I think I'm gonna, Blow chunks. I think I'm gonna, Hurl. I think I'm gonna, Pray to the porcelain god. I think I'm gonna, Puke. I think I'm gonna, spew. I think it was Oscar Wilde who once said... I think you have me confused with someone who gives a shit! I think, therefore I am (or am I?). I think, therefore I am overqualified. I think, therefore I am overqualified... I think, therefore I am... I think. I think, therefore I am... I think. I think, therefore I'm overqualified !!! I thought I made a mistake once, but I was wrong... I toast. Therefore I am. I told you, I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid! I tried snorting coke ... and almost DROWNED! I tried to contain myself, but I escaped! I tried to drown my problems but they can swim! I use OS/2 2.0 and I don't care who knows! I used to be disgusted, now I'm just amused. I used to be indecisive; now I'm not sure. I used to have a handle on life, then it broke. I used to have money in the bank, now I have a BBS I used to have peace of mind, now,I have kids. I used to trust the media to tell me the truth. I used to write, but now I message. I vote that you add it to the disclaimers in the report. I wanna die with NOTHING left working! I want Kirstie Alley for Christmas. I want Kirstie Alley for my Birthday! I want my, I want my, I want my XRS! I want to be immortal by not dying -W.Allen I want to hear you scream..in pain.Play some Rap music I wanted to be... A *LUMBERJACK*! I was BSer long before I became a BBSer! I was a snowball in hell. I was a tall person before I used PKZIP...! I was born this way! What's your excuse? I was born to Code, Compile, Link, Test, Debug! I was bown in a cwossfiwe huwwicane-Jumpin J. Fudd I was gonna be a barber but neurosurgery pays better I was here and you were gone,now your here and I'm gone! I was making donuts and now I'm on a bus! I was on a roll till I slipped on the butter I was the kid next door's imaginary friend. I wasn't picking my nose ... I was scratching. I wasn't there; I didn't do it; you can't prove it. I welcome criticism write yours here _______ I went window shopping...and bought OS/2! I will always love the false image I had of you. I will hunt you down and flog you with wet tissues... I will not fear. Fear is the mind killer. I will not get very far with this attitude. I wonder if BOB GUCCIONE has these problems..? I wonder what Mr. Ed would do. I wonder what this button does.... I wonder, does Barbara Bush spit or swallow? I work with User-Surly Software. I would save the whales if knew where to put them. I wouldn't be caught dead with a necrophiliac. I wouldn't wish it on Mae West enemy. I write therefore I exist I wuz bo'n dis way - whut's yo' 'suse? I'M NOT IN A #@#(*) BAD MOOD YOU #@#@(* @#@*&#(@ I'd Say More But I've Run Out of Time & Space. I'd be smarter if you knew enough to teach me... I'd enjoy the day more if it started later. I'd give everyone a Twinkie, but I'm not a Hostess.. I'd give my left arm to be ambidextrous. I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous. I'd give my right hand to be ambidextrious. I'd go on welfare, but I'm not used to living that well!! I'd like it all automated. I'd like some JUNK FOOD...then I want to be ALONE. I'd like to fly, but I can't even swim. I'd much rather a pitbull 'ride' my leg than eat it. I'd put it on my to-do list,but I can't count that high I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy! I'd strongly oppose apathy, if I cared I'd take a Bromo, but I can't stand the noise. I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead. I'll be Bach.- Johann Sebastian Schwarzenegger I'll be lost in the ozone for a while. I'll be unstopable when I get started... I'll bet you're wondering who wrote this quote. I'll bite your legs off! I'll buy THAT for a dollar. I'll byte your bits if you'll nybble my words! I'll call you back, my call-waiting's beeping! I'll do it tomorrow, quite calling me a procrastinator! I'll drink to that! I'll eat ANYTHING that's BRIGHT BLUE!! I'll have to think twice before I give it a second thought... I'll have what the gentleman on the floor is having. I'll have what the guy on the floor is having. I'll never forget good o'l what's-her-name I'll never forget good ol' what's-his-name. I'll nibble if you'll byte. I'll only bite if you want me to! I'll panic if I bloody well want to....... I'll play fair if I get to make up the rules. I'll remove the cause, but not the symptom. I'll show you MY telex number if you show me YOURS... I'll take tuna on rye, hold the mercury. I'll try anything once too often. I'll try anything once too often. I'm *not* paranoid! (Who wants to know?) I'm Arnold Shwarzenegger's Twin Brother! I'm BeetleJuice... the Ghostis with the Mostist! I'm Crazy but not Stupid.. I think.... I'm FLYING I'm FLYING! >>THUD<< I'm GREAT at immaturity. I've been practicing for decades. I'm Having A Ball Doing Nothing At All. I'm Losing More Than I Ever Had. I'm NOT paranoid. Which of my enemies said I was? I'm Proud To Be An Expert Tagline Thief! I'm SMOKING the Dragon... I'm SO nice, that when I step in it I don't say it. I'm Yankee Doodle Dandee in a Gold Rolls Royce. I'm a 10th generation A.I. holographic computer. I'm not your Mum! I'm a 5' drive, she has a 3' drive, it'd never work out I'm a Loony Tune Muso - What's YOUR Disability????? I'm a belligerent omnivore -- I eat vegetarians. I'm a confirmed sexist. I prefer sex! I'm a doctor, not an Engineer!,You are now. I'm a licensed Smurf stomper! I'm a modemer and I'm OK, I post all night and I sleep all day. I'm a perfectionist with other people's work. I'm a single-tasking, single-threaded guy. I'm a single-tasking, single-threaded guy. I'm a tagline and I'm okay... I'm a very modest person. And damn proud of it. I'm afraid I can't do that Dave.. I'm an OS/2 developer...I don't NEED a life! I'm an Omegosh tester. I'm an Omegosh tester. I'm bad. I'm nationwide I'm broad-minded. I hardly think of anything else. I'm busier than a one-eyed cat watching two mouse holes. I'm dangerous when I know what I'm doing. I'm developing "TAGrophobia" ! I'm excessively annoying. I'm feeling argumentative. Please contradict me! I'm feeling homicidal. Say anything! I'm firm. You're stubborn. He's pigheaded. I'm flexible, just don't change anything!! I'm flexible..just don't change anything. I'm friends of the Daniels brothers..... Jack and Charlie!!! I'm from the government. I'm here to help you. I'm from the government. I'm here to help you. I'm getting better but I forgot the subject!! I'm getting better! You'll be stone dead in a moment. I'm glad we don't get all the government we pay for. I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal. I'm going to disconnect your brain. I'm gonna plead insanity, what about you? I'm gonna wash that yam right outta my hair ... I'm gonna, be making a call on the great white telephone. I'm happy as a clam in heat .. in heat ?? I'm hardware and don't know anything about software. I'm having a MID-WEEK CRISIS! --Henry Kissinger I'm having a big bang theory! ---Zippy I'm having an old friend for dinner -- H. Lecter I'm having one of those decades. I'm here because I'm not all there. I'm in a phone booth at the corner of Walk and Dont Walk. I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it? I'm into BBS&M. I'm joining the Procrastinators Club - soon I'm joining the Procrastinators Club - soon. I'm just a peripheral visionary. I'm just needling you about the thread I'm just trying out this . It seems a bit small. I'm just trying out this . It's not registered yet. I'm looking for myself. Anybody seen me lately? I'm losing my thought of train.... I'm lost in a Batch of BATs. I'm lost in a Batch of BATs. I'm mad as heck....where's the check! I'm more humble than you are! I'm more humble than you are! I'm much too young to feel this damned old. I'm multitasking, not multiuser. Tell my boss. I'm neither for, nor against, apathy. I'm no housewife, try Domestic Engineer! I'm not 32 , I'm 18 with 14 years experience! I'm not Cheap - Just Frugal. I'm not Schizophrenic! Yes I am! No I'm Not! Who are you? I'm not a Sysop, but I play one on TV... I'm not a dictator. It's just that I have a grumpy face. I'm not a doctor, although I play one on tv I'm not a sysop, although I play one on TV. I'm not an acronym... I'm a human being! Err... Oops. I'm not arrogant, I'm RIGHT! I'm not as think as you stoned I am. I'm not asz think asz you drunk I am, Ossifer! I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way. I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way. I'm not hostile! I'll kill the #%! that said that! I'm not in a hurry; I just want to get in front of you. I'm not lost - just misguided. I'm not lost, I'm "locationally challenged". I'm not old I'm chronologically disadvantaged. I'm not old, just chronologically challenged! I'm not paranoid! Which of my enemies told you this? I'm not paranoid. That's a rumor spread by my enemies. I'm not prejudiced - I hate everybody equally! I'm not prejudiced; I hate everybody equally! I'm not religious. God willing, I never will be. I'm not short, I am Vertically challenged. I'm not stupid, I'm not expendable, and I'm not going! I'm not sure officer.. He just said FAX ME UP SCOTTIE.. I'm not tense, just terribly A*L*E*R*T I'm not tense, just terribly A*L*E*R*T! I'm not young enough to know everything I'm on the see-food diet - see food, eat it! I'm only happy when I worry about stuff. I'm only sixteen! I'm too young to be freeze dried! I'm out of bed and dressed. What more do you want? I'm outstanding in my field (left field) knee deep in BS I'm rated PG-34!! I'm reading this by the warm glow of my dog. I'm so BAD! I even steal my own s!! I'm so close to hell I can almost see Vegas! I'm so confused.... I'm so horny even the crack of Dawn isn't safe! I'm so horny, even the crack of dawn isn't safe! I'm so nervous, yesterday I got a fingernail transplant! I'm sorry -- my karma ran over your dogma. I'm sorry I've been indulging in creative forgetting. I'm sorry, what does 'Off Topic' mean? I'm sorry, you are not cleared for that information. I'm sorry. Did you say something? I'm sorry. Thank you for playing. Next contestant. I'm spending a year dead for tax purposes. I'm standing! And I can't fall down! I'm sure it's clearly explained in the Zmodem DOC's I'm sure that I'm confused about being sure.. I'm sure that I'm confused about being sure.. I'm telling you, they are EVERYWHERE! I'm tired of being a sex symbol! I'm too sexy for myself. I'm too sexy for this class. I'm too sexy for this party. I'm too sexy to read the docs.... I'm try'n to protect what I keep inside.. I'm trying to find myself. Anyone seen me lately? I'm unsafe at any speed. I'm usually awake near the end of the day. I'm waitin' fo' 20Mb FLOPPIES. Right On! I'm waiting for Windows v4.0! I'm waiting for the 50 mhz 686. I'm writing a book. I've got the page numbers done. I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography. I've Forgotten MY EZ Password! (*^()*^_ *^(@ I've Forgotten MY EZ Password! (*^()*^_ *^(@ I've GOT one! I have a SPECIAL PURPOSE!! I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. I've been scheduled for a karma transplant. I've been vaccinated against rabies. *snarl* I've commited adultery in my heart many times. I've committed adultery in my heart many times I've crashed and I can't boot up! I've dialed and I can't hang up! I've fallen and I need Stand Up. I've fallen but the stupid button doesn't WORK! I've fallen! And I can't reach my BEER! I've fallen! And I don't care! I've got 1,2,3,4,5 - senses working overtime. I've got a piece of brain lodged in me head! I've got a swell idea -- let's put on a show! I've got an Invisible Touch...whatever the hell that is. I've got morals; I just don't know where they are. I've got to take a break or I'll start talking to myself! I've got too many hands on my time! I've had BETA days ... and nights!!! I've had a difficult past few lives. I've had a hard drive, think I'll crash. I've had just about all I can take of myself. I've never fallen in love...but I stepped in it once! I've plummeted to my death and I can't get up! I've seen better legs in a bucket of chicken ... I've seen better legs in a bucket of chicken. I've told you MILLIONS of times, don't exaggerate! I've upped my standards, now UP YOURS! IBM - (I)nferior (B)ut (M)arketable. IBM - Making tomorrow's mistakes Today! IBM PS/1? A Prodigy Workstation! IBM stands for "Inferior But Marketable" IBM:You can buy better,but you can't pay more ICBM = Start of the daily routine for an Eskimo. IF TAGLINE = STOLEN THEN Insult(Thief) IF %PRICE%!==LIST! KEEP SHOPPING. IF IsStolen. THEN GOTO InsultThief IF KidsPerFamily > 2 THEN Ecological.Crime = TRUE IF YOU DON'T DRIVE...DRINK. IFYOUCANREADTHISYOU'REOBVIOUSLYTOOCLOSETOMY. ILLITERATE? Write for a free brochure... IMPIETY: Your irreverence toward my deity. IN THE COMPUTER ROOM, no one can hear you SCREAM! INDIAN Cuisine is a challenge, eat it often! IQ Error: Brain Not Ready (A)bort (R)etry (F)orget it.. IRAQ: Went in, kicked ass, then got the hell out! IRS: Please be seated; read your rights while we audit your return. IS anyone out THERE HELLO,HELLO IT AUTOMATICALLY HOMES IN ON THE NEAREST PLACE OF WORSHIP Ice not found, pour straight to continue. Icon see clearly now, the pane is gone... Idiot (id-ee-it) n.- One who disagrees with you. Idiot congressman....Hey! That's redundant. Idiots rise to the level of their incompetency! Idleness is the holiday of fools. If $$$ doesn't grow on trees, why are they green? If (stone != rolling) moss++; If All Fails, READ THE DOCS ! If At First You Don't Succeed Call The Author. If At First You Don't Succeed Ignore The Docs. If E=MC, how many watts do my speakers take? If ET married Peter Cetera, would he then be ET Cetera ? If Glass=Empty .AND. Thirsty Then OpenTuborg If I *argue* with you,I must take up a contrary position! If I buy the steel wool, can you knit me a Porsche? If I could, I would, but I can't, so I won't If I didn't know now what I didn't know then If I didn't know now what I didn't know then. If I had a Life I would be living it. If I had known it was harmless I would have killed it myself. --PKD If I had two dead mousies, I'd give you one ... If I knew what was in it, I probably wouldn't eat it. If I now have egg on my face, please pass a washcloth! If I only had one more teragigadactylbyte.. If I only had something to do with my life!?! If I only had something to do with my life!?! If I save the whales, where do I keep them? If I save the whales, where will I keep them? If I save time, when do I get it back? If I was human I would..Wait a minute! I AM Human If I were dead, I wouldn't be alive! If I were dead, I wouldn't be alive! If I were two faced, would I wear this one? If I were you, who'd be me? If I were you, who'd be me? If Iraq invaded Turkey from the rear would Greece help? If It's Bug Free, It's Time to Make Changes. If Murphy's Law can go wrong, it will. If PRO<>CON is Congress the Opposite of Progress? If This Is Hell - Where Are the Lawyers??? If Version 1.0 works someone goofed... If Windows sucked it would be good for something. If Windows sucked it would be good for something. If You Choose Not To Decide You Still Have Made A Choice If You Smoke After Sex, You're Doing It Too Fast!!!! If a word in the dictionary were misspelled, how would we know? If all goes well, you've overlooked something! If anything -can't- go wrong, it will. If at first you don't succeed - so much for skydiving. If at first you don't succeed, *.* & forget it If at first you don't succeed, *.* & forget it If at first you don't succeed, CHEAT! If at first you don't succeed, blame the computer! If at first you don't succeed, call it Version 1.0... If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried. If at first you don't succeed, destroy all the evidence. If at first you don't succeed, forget skydiving. If at first you don't succeed, give up. If at first you don't succeed, quit, quit at once. If at first you don't succeed, redefine success. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving isn't for you. If at first you don't succeed, work for Microsoft. If at first you don't succeed, you're about normal. If at first you dont succeed.. read the book! If computers save time, when do we get it back? If everyone lived forever, where would we all park!? If everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane! If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy? If it ain't broke yet, let me have a shot at it. If it ain't broke, break it! If it ain't broke, kick it harder! If it ain't broke, you CAN'T fix it! If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway. If it breaks, it needed replacing anyway. If it doesn't move, NEEDLEPOINT it! If it doesn't work, it's physics. If it doesn't, paint it! If it don't cook, it ain't jazz. If it has TITS or TIRES, you gonna have trouble with it. If it has tits or tires, you'll have trouble with it. If it is to be, it is up to me. If it is to be, it is up to me. If it isn't borken, don't fix it. If it isn't good, may it be struck by lightning. Again! If it jams - force it. If it breaks, it needed replacing. If it looks easy, it's tough. If it looks easy, it's tough... If it looks like a fly & tastes like a fly -- If it looks tough, it's impossible. If it moves so SLOW, why is it called Rush Hour? If it stinks, it's chemistry. If it taste good, spit it out, it's bad for you. If it wasn't for C, we would be using BASI, PASAL and OBOL! If it weren't for C, we'd all use Pascal, BASIC and COBOL! If it works ,rip it apart & find out WHY ! If it works, Don't fix it. If it works, it must be obsolete. If it's BLUE and doesn't work, it's the Air Force! If it's Monday it must be meatloaf! If it's Tourist Season why can't we shoot 'em?? If it's dirty, it belongs here! If it's fixed, don't break it! If it's glowing, don't eat it... If it's in stock, we've got it! If it's not music I don't want to hear it! If it's not violent.. WHAT FUN IS IT? If it's stupid but it works, it isn't stupid. If it's useless and does nothing, call it v1.0 If life deals you a bad hand, asks for a reshuffle!! If life is a bowl of cherries, throwing stones is ok. If life is a rat race, the rats are winning. If little else, the brain is an educational toy. If marriage is outlawed, only outlaws will have inlaws! If my disk crashes do I require autoexec insurance? If nobody measures up, check your yardstick. If nobody uses it, there's a reason. If not for us, you might have done something constructive. If nothing can go wrong, something will ! If only AT&T knew what I was do&%$m6% NO CARRIER .... If only women came with pull-down menus and on-line help If our behavior is strict, we do not need fun! If screwups were dollars, I'd be a millionaire!! If seeing is believing, some skeptics wouldn't look. If sex is a pain in the butt, you're doing it wrong. If she won't live forever, why give her a diamond? If speed scares you, try Micro$oft Windows. If the boys wanna fight you'd better let 'em. If the enemy is in range, SO ARE YOU. If the limit was 250, there'd be no speeders... If the people lead, the leaders will follow. If the people lead, the leaders will follow. If the shoe fits, buy it. - Imelda Marcos If the shoe fits, buy it. - Imelda Marcos If the shoe fits, it's not government issue. If the thunder don't get you ... If the world is a stage, I have stage fright! If the world is a stage, I have stage fright! If the world is a test, we must be the bugs. If the world were a logical place, men would ride side-saddle. If there is any way to do it wrong, he will.-Ed Murphy If there is no God, who pops up the next Kleenex? If there wasn't divorces, where would we get waitresses? If they can't take a joke....fuck 'em. If they don't pay ya', SUE THE BASTARDS!!! If this is paradise, I wish I had a lawn mower If this is paradise, I wish I had a lawnmower. If this statement wasn't here,This space would be left intentionally blank If this were an actual , it would be funny. If this were an actual , it would be funny. If this were the Soviet Union you'd be reading this in Russian. If tree fell on florist, would he make sound? If u cn rd ths u shld sy no 2 drgs ! If voting could bring change, it would be illegal. If we don't raise 8 million dollars, God is going to kill us. If we took the bones out, it wouldn't be crunchy! If we weren't all crazy, we would go insane. If winning isn't important; then why keep score? If wishes were horses, beggars would ride. If worms carried 45's, what would the early bird do?? If you ain't got it then you ain't communicatin'. If you ain't the lead dog, the scenery never changes. If you are searching for yourself. Find a mirror first! If you are short of everything but the enemy, you are in a combat zone. If you can kill a snake with it, it ain't art. If you can read this, you're too close. If you can still hear the music, it's not loud enough! If you can't be offensive WHY BOTHER? If you can't do it well, enjoy doing it badly. If you can't document it, it isn't true. If you can't enjoy yourself, enjoy somebody else. If you can't fix it call it a feature. If you can't get a job, get a senate appointment!!! If you can't keep it up, move over! If you can't make it good, make it big. If you can't make it good, make it big. If you can't remember, the claymore is pointed at you. If you can't say something nice, say something surrealistic. If you cannot convince them...confuse them!!! If you come any closer introduce yourself! If you consult enough experts, you can confirm any opinion. If you could get there from here you wouldn't want to. If you didn't know what it was, you wouldn't have called. If you don't care where you are, you ain't lost! If you don't care where you're at, you ain't lost! If you don't cook you get a raw deal every meal! If you don't get it first,you don't get it all If you don't get it first,you don't get it all. If you don't know the answer....make one up! If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself! If you don't like my opinion of you - improve yourself! If you don't vote, don't complain... If you don't want it to - it CAN happen. If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt. If you drink, dont park, accidents cause people. If you fool around with a thing for very long you will screw it up. If you get to the end, who cares about the means? If you go into heat, package your meat. If you have an opinion we'll FLAME it. If you have nothing to do, don't do it here. If you have to ask what Jazz is, you'll never know. If you leave the room, you're elected. If you leave the room, you're elected. If you look closely at Gorbachev's head, you'll see our number. If you order extra cheese on a pizza do you really get it? If you pay peanuts, do you get monkeys? If you prick me, do I not... leak? If you prick me, do I not... leak? If you pull the wings off a fly, does it become a walk? If you push something hard enough... If you push something hard enough... If you say nothing no one can make you repeat it If you see any misspelled words it HAS to be line noise. If you shoot a mime, should you use a silencer? If you shoot at mimes, should you use a silencer? - SW If you smoke after sex, you're doing it too fast! If you think Windows is slow, try Norton DeskTop! If you think education is expensive, try ignorance! If you think that you are sweet, take off your jock & smell the seat!! If you try to please everybody, nobody will like it. If you wait, it will go away. If you want it done right, forget Microsoft. If you want it, press [esc] now! If you want my advice, pay me! If you want my advice, pay me! If you want peace, work for justice If you want to cheer up, cheer up someone. If you want your name spelt wrong, die. If you want your name spelt wrong, die. If you wish to know more, press CTRL-ALT-DEL. If you're 1 in 1 million, there's 2500 of you. If you're feeling good, don't worry, you'll get over it. If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off. If you're gonna use s, at least write yer own! (c) If you're gonna wake a Tiger - use a LONG STICK! If you're not a hemmoroid get off my ass! If you're not in NJ, where do you think you are? If you're not the lead dog, everything looks the same! If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush. If your behind is in front, you turned around! If your behind is in front, you turned around! If your cow doesn't give milk, sell _him_. If your cow doesn't give milk, sell him! If your cow, doesn't give milk dairy farming just isn't for you! If your cow, has only one teat dairy farming just isn't for you! If your feet smell and your nose runs, you're built upside down. If your work speaks for itself, don't interrupt. If(ThisDay()!=MyDay)DosSleep(UntilNextDay); Ifyoucanreadthis,youspendtoomuchtimefiguringouts. Igloo [n], Material used to keep an ig from falling apart. Ignorance is bliss... so life's great if you are ignorant Ignorance is temporary - Stupidity is forever Ignorance is temporary; Stupid is forever. Ignorance is where learning begins... Ignorance kills daily. Ignorance or apathy? I don't know and I don't care. Ignore the last few lines, the writer's a musician! Ignore the man behind the screen. Ignore your health and it will go away. Illiterate? Write for FREE HELP! Illiterate? Write for FREE HELP! Illiterate? Write today for free help. Im Bart Simpson.. who the hell are you? - Bart Simpson Im FLYING Im FLYING! >>THUD<< Im a doctor, not a magician! -- Bones McCoy Im looking for an Al, last name Choholic.. Imagination is more important than knowledge! Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality! Imagination-Inspiration for a resourceful Mind. Immoral Majority Charter Member. ImpLode, UpLode, DownLode, ExpLode! Impossible - adj. Nailing Jello to a tree. Imprisoned in .QWK file! Send the ZIP army! In ((STEREO)) where available. In Case of Fire, Log off Promptly. In God we trust you pay in gold. In WW III, all men will be cremated equal. In a nuclear war, all men will be cremated equal In case of doubt, make it sound convincing. In case of emergency read manual. In case of rapture, please grab the wheel. In every revolution there is one man with a vision. In order to get a loan, you must first prove that you don't need it. In plumbing, a straight flush is better than a full house! In politics, an absurdity is not a handicap. In search of the perfect . In stereo (where available). In tabulario donationem fect. In the dark, all cats are gray. In the end Gravity Wins.. Dolly Parton.. In the fight between you and the world, bet on the world - F. Zappa In the game of life, father time always wins In the pursuit of distortion-free AUDIO! In the tickling and the trembling of freeze tag In the winter you lose your body; in the summer you lose your mind. In this business, you either lead, follow or get the hell out of the way. In waking a tiger, use a long stick. Inaccuracy can save a lot of explanation. Inane tagline found. Abort, Retry, Swipe a better one. Incest should stay in the Family. Include this in your CONFIG.SYS File: BUGS=OFF Incoming fire has the right of way. Incongruous -- Where U.S. laws are made. Indecision Clouds My Vision. Indecision is the basis for flexibility. Indecision is the key to flexibility. Individualists unite! Inevitability is my first goal as a writer. Infinity is one lawyer waiting for another. Inflation has gone up about a dollar a quart. Inflation is a result of legalized counterfeiting. Innuendo: Italian for 'suppository'. Innuendo: Italian for where you hang your curtains. Inquiring minds already think they know! Inquiring minds couldn't care less! Insanity is all in the mind Insanity is fun if you do it right. Insanity is hereditary: you get it from your kids. Insert New Disk for Drive C: Press ENTER when ready. Insert Witty Tagline Here ... Inside every fat person is a thin person. The fat one ate him. Insomnia isn't anything to lose sleep over. Install failed: Attempting to transfer virus to c: Installation recommended (not included). Insufficient memory for Mackintosh users. Insufficient resourses : insert Wallet into drive A: ... Intelligence Incarnate. Intense : Where campers hang out. Intentionally concentrating and inhaling the vapors can be harmful. InterLink Shareware conference moderator. Interchangeable devices won't. Interchangeable devices won't. International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves Into your heart it will creep. Invertebrate punster - so slug me! Invertebrates make no bones about it. Iow-a, Iow-a, it's off to space I go-a.... Iraq's national Bird: DUCK! Iraq-nophobia...Never! Iraqi Bingo: B-52...F-16...M-1...F-18...F-117...A-10... Iraqi rifle for sale... Never fired... Dropped once. Irresponsible Rip-Off Service. Is "Floppy" one of the seven dwarfs? Is :-> a C++ operator or what? Is Darth Vader YOUR father, too? Is OS/2 only half an operating system? Is THAT all, Bernard Goetz? Is There Intelligent Life in the Universe? Is This Where a "" Goes? Is a Transcontinental Auto Trip a Hard Drive? Is acid rain really a form of hippy manna? Is an idiotic sergeant a noncompoop? Is beer like Champagne? Is death legally binding? Is it 'Flow Control' or 'wolF lortnoC' Is it just me, or is my monitor breathing? Is sex in a cornfield, PORN on the cob? Is that Hemorrhoids or am I sitting on a bunch of grapes? Is that a banana in your pocket, or you happy to see me? Is the register better or the times? Is there a patient in the house? Is there a tax exemption for codependents? Is this some more of that Trombonist's humor? Is this the right room for an argument? Is this what you intend to do with your life? Is this yours? Your dog left it on my lawn... Is virus a 'micro' organism? Isn't damn Yankee one word? Isn't it interesting that IRANGATE Proves crooks go free? Isn't shrimp on a Barbie a bit kinky? Isn't that special. It IS the heat!! It Is Better To Copulate Than Never. It all makes sense if you take every other word... It always happens, but we never expect 'the unexpected' It can't be full...I STILL HAVE SUBDIRECTORIES ! It changed my life, it was good, the end. It did WHAT? - Well, it's not *supposed* to do that. It doesn't work, but I'm working on it.... It don't get much better than this folks. It goes in, it must come out. It got better when the Swedish Bikini Team came. It has no advantage to argue with the teacher. It has no punch lines. It hurts to be on the cutting edge. It is a conspiracy. It is a rather pleasant experience to be alone in a bank at night. It is bad luck to be superstitious. It is better to be looked over than overlooked. It is better to wear out than to forget. It is better to wear out than to rust out. It is morally wrong to allow suckers to keep their money. It is not enough to succeed. Others must fail. It is possible that blondes also prefer gentlemen. Nah! It is when I struggled to be brief that I became obscure. It it ain't broke, let me have a shot at it. It just doesn't get any better than this. Ok, maybe it does... It just won't break, chip, or split. It looks just like a Telefunken U-47. It looks like a flying purple people eater! It matters not so much what you sing, but why --- J.S. Bach It may be GUI but you still can't eat it! It may be GUI but you still can't eat it! It only rang twice...then the dog answered.. It only takes a small oven to produce a half-baked idea. It only works when you're not looking. It said, "Insert Disk #3", but only 2 would fit It shall be said: He died as he had lived: In his sleep. It slices, it dices. It stinks more every time you run over a skunk. It takes 2.0, baby, it takes 2.0... It takes a long time to understand nothing. It takes years to become an overnight success. It tasted so good the first time, I brought it back up for an encore. It used to be so easy... It was SUPPOSED to be a surprise. It was a dark and stormy byte... It was a glitch and - IT'S GONE! I'm back! It was a stark and dormy night ... It was supposed to be so easy... It went *ZAP* when it fired. It won't work. It works better if you plug it in THEN turn it on! It works better if you plug it in. It'll be in v2.9....I promise!!!! It's 1000. Do you know what time it is? It's 10:00. Do you know what time it is? It's 10PM, Do you know where your software is?? It's 11pm, do you know where your modem is? It's Abby Normal's brain! It's Alive. Well, not REALLY, but it was pretty scary, huh. It's Easier to Put on Slippers. Then To Carpet The World. It's Late. Go To Sleep. It's NOT the principle of the thing, it's the money. It's O.K., they're speaking Chinese. It's OS/2, Jim, but not OS/2 as we know it. It's STILL not weird enough for me!!! It's The First MOOD RING : It's Time For NATIONAL REFERENDUMS Instead Of Politicians It's Wise To Know Enough To Not Know Too Much It's Wise To Know Enough To Not Know Too Much It's a Board! It's a plane! It's A, aah, A, aah, aw, screw it... It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood,... It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood,... It's a busy life in Camelot: It's a chain saw. I always carry one for emergencies. It's a dead man's party...Who could ask for more? It's a gnarly day in the neighborhood... It's a probable twelve to seven... It's a sky blue sky. Satellites are out tonight. It's a sky blue sky. Satellites are out tonight. It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to paint it. It's a state of mind. It's alive Jim, but not as we know it! It's alive, it's alive...muhahaha! It's all a conspiracy. It's always darkest at the top of the stairs. It's always darkest before you step on the cat. It's always darkest right before you step in dog mess! It's always darkest when the light bulb has blown. It's always harder to pave the way for others! It's always someone else's problem anyway ... It's as EZ as 1-2-3 HA! It's back...and it's got a gun. It's been Monday aaaaaaaaallllllll week! It's been lovely, but I have to scream now. It's called getting it in the NEC It's called getting it in the NEC. It's certainly uncontaminated by cheese.... It's colder than a witches t*t in a brass bra on the 12th of January! It's deja vu all over again. It's easier to do good then be good. It's easier to do good then be good. It's easier to get older than it is to get wiser It's either very early or very late. It's funny because *I* said it! It's great AND less filling. It's great to do nothing and rest afterward. It's hard to type when you gotta go Baaaad... ummmmm... It's impossible to keep tabs on blondes, so use VISA! It's just a jump to the left.......... It's just a jump to the left.......... It's just like life. Only more so. It's kind of fun doing the impossible. It's kind of fun to do the impossible. It's like having Kim Bassinger and a cattle prod AT THE SAME TIME! It's lonely at the top, but you eat better. It's my birthday today! Hooray. It's my idea 'cause I stole it first! It's my party and I'll Snubb who I want! It's never as easy as you think. It's never too late to have a happy childhood! It's nice to be important, but it's important to be nice. It's not Camelot, but it's not Cleveland either. It's not a BBS, but it plays one on TV. It's not a BBS, it's a concept. It's not a Bug, it's a hidden and seldom used feature. It's not a Mystery Reader anymore. It's not a black or a white thing... It's a death thing! It's not a bug, it's a feature! (Marketing 101) It's not a bug, it's a feature. It's not a virus - it's been Windows It's not if you win or lose, but how you place the blame. It's not just a BBS...it's an adventure. It's not just a hobby, it's an adventure! It's not just a hobby, it's an adventure! It's not just a job, it's a BBS. It's not just a phone line, it's $5.70 a month. It's not just for breakfast anymore. It's not my FAULT It's not my FAULT. It's not my planet monkeyboy. It's not pretty being easy. It's not pretty being easy. It's okay to laugh in the bedroom, but don't point. It's on the way, yes it is. It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a It's only cheating when you get caught! It's probably a bad day when, you find a dead fish in your underwear. It's someone else's fault! It's sunning cats and dogs. It's the battle of the wigwams and the fighting's intents. It's who you look like, not who you are. It's wonderful to be here, it's certainly a thrill... It`s not how hard it rains but how fast you drive. Itch for fame? Use powder daily. Its GOOD to be the King! (Mel Brooks) Its a dogma-eat-dogma world! Its fatal to be appreciated in one's own time. Its like 'safe sex'....only SAFER! Its never as easy as the manual says it is! Its not a bug, its an undocumented feature. Its not for everyone, so what are you doing here Itseemsalittlecrowdedinheredontyouthink? Ive been dead before. - Cpt. Spock Ive got a lot of honey on my nose. JESUS SAVES; the rest of us better make backups. JUST ANOTHER INMATE IN THIS ASYLUM! JUST WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING DAVE? JVC-the Northgate of the VCR world Japan says your illiterate. Japanese Pet Store: "Buy one, get one flea." Jealousy is all the fun you think they have. Jeffrey Dahmers Cookbook: A Farewell to Arms. Jeffrey Dahmers Cookbook: How to cook with Heard and Soul. Jeffrey Dahmers Cookbook: How to get a head in refrigeration. Jeffrey Dahmers Cookbook: Shortcuts to becoming a Head Chef. Jeffrey Darmer is a smoker. They found a pile of butts in his house! Jeffrey's favorite recipes: ART's Choked Heart. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: BABY Back Ribs. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: BOB-B-Que. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Baked Alaskan. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Beans and FRANK. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Brown Knees. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: CHUCK's Roast. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Elbow Macaroni. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Eyesburg Lettuce. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Fillet O'FRED. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Finger Sandwiches. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Handburger. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Head Lettuce. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Icebox Surprise Pie. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Kidney Pie. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Leg O'SAM. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Manwich. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Mixed Nuts. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Moo Goo Guy in a Pan. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: PETER Bread. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Rice a RONNIE. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Rump Roast. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Scrambled Legs. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Screamin' SAMMY Sausage. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Shisk-K-BOB. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Sloppy JOE. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Spaghetti and Pete's Balls. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Sum-Yun-Guy. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: TERRY Aki. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: Tongue Sandwich. Jeffrey's favorite recipes: VINCE Meat Pie. Jellybeans and windex are essentially evil. Jerry Brown loves Ronald Reagan. Jesus Saves - not on my salary he doesn't. Jesus Saves - not on my salary he doesn't. Jesus Saves --at First National Bank Jesus Saves... but Moses invests! Jesus is coming back, and boy, is he ticked! Jesus saves sinners and redeems them for valuable prizes. Jesus saves, Moses earns, but the Mongol Hordes Jesus saves, passes to Moses, he shoots, he scores! Jim, I'm a doctor not a prostitute! Jim, I'm a programmer, not a paeologist! :-> Jim, you don't ask GOD for his ID! Jimi Hendrix's modem was a Purple Hayes. Jimmy Dean --- Rebel Without a Sausage. Jimmy Pearson for Kansas State Executioner! Joe Biden writes these quotes down...I wonder why? Joe's Morgue you kill'em we chill'em! Joe's Moturary: You Stab 'Em, We Slab 'Em! Joe's crematorium u kill'em we grill'em! Joe, did you get Jean's ansi figured out yet? Joggers and zodiacs and darts, WTF! Johnson & Johnson : ۰ "ouch" Join s Anonymous. We can help. Join s Anonymous. We can help. Join the Athletics conference today! Join the joyride! Jose Canseco - role model for the '90's??? Jumbo Shrimp?! Let's think about that. Jumping to conclusions can be a bad exercise .. Junior, quit playing with your floppy! Junk software doesn't require MNP transfers Junk: Stuff we throw away. Stuff: Junk we keep. Just 'cause it won't work; YOU think its buggy Just 'cause it won't work; YOU think its buggy. Just My Opinion (But I'm Always Right!) Just My Opinion (But I'm Right!) Just Visiting This Planet . . . Just a RIME without a reason..... Just a lil angel with a dirty face. Just a little pin-prick... there'll be no more... Just a shameless ascii thief... Just another dull moment in S.MR Just another prisoner of gravity!! Just another random quote. Just another useless, unnecessary tagline! Just because I'm moody doesn't mean you're not irritating Just because you say it doesn't make it true. Just because your paranoid, Dont mean there not after you Just call on me, and I'll send it along....... Just checking if you're busy... Just crank it up! Just crank it up! Just doing time on plaet Earth... Just don't tell the asylum you saw me here. Just exactly how much 'Whiz' is in Cheese Whiz? Just for the taste of it, Diet Coke" -C. Thomas Just got a new car for my wife... Great trade... Just jiggle it a little, it'll open. Just lie back and enjoy it. Just like '976-TALK', only better and cheaper. Just nod if you can hear me. Just one more compile and I'll come to bed... Just outside the realm of reality, and somewhat west of Jersey. Just pretend it's a VAX. Just remember, CAPTAIN Riker's never lost. Just say NO! to Pc Tools... Just say NO! to Pc Tools... Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale... Just slightly ahead of it's time. Just some extemporaneous personal communication Just wait until I reply to YOUR reply! KILL IT..before it sucks the chrome off! KILL the s.o.b. - THEN count to 10. KILROY was here. KOTEX - a radio station in Texas. Keep honking...I'm reloading Keep it where it belongs, Not where you want it! Keep out of reach of children. Keep your city clean...eat a pigeon. Keepin' up with the joneses is killin' me Kennedy Cab&Catering - for the party & ride of a lifetime. Kennedy Compound -KEEP OUT- trespassers will be VIOLATED! Keptin, a Romulan Wessel ahead!' 'A _wessel_, Mr.Chekov?' Kermit the frog meets Xmodem the bird... Keyboard not attached. Press F10 to continue Keyboard not found...THINK F1 to Continue. Keyboard: a device for entering mistakes into a computer. Keyboard: device used to enter errors into the computer. Khristmas Karol with a K? Kill What You Can't Understand. Kill the extremists. Kill the wabbit!!! Kill the wabbit!!! Kill two birds with one stone? What happend to shotguns? Kill'em All ... Let God Sort Them Out. Kill-9,do NOT pass go,do NOT collect $200... Kirk to Enterprise - beam down yeoman Rand and a six-pack Kiss my ASCII. KissimmeE-FL--A-ReaL-MickY-MousE-TowN- Klaatu Barada Nicotine!!! Klaatu barada niktu-Gort,Ive fallen and I cant get up Kleenex Von Trapp: The Sound of Mucous. Knock firm but softly. I like soft firm knockers! Know of what you speak, speak of what you know! Know what I like about Windows? Not a damn thing. Know why they're roach clips,POT holder was already taken! Knowledge comes but wisdom lingers. Knowledge is knowing that you don't know. Known to be addictive. Kotex not best thing in world, but next to it. Kvack, Kvack! --Duck speaking with a Swedish accent. LANtmine A server on the verge of crashing. LAWFUL,adj. Compatible with the will of a judge having jurisdiction. LET'S MAKE A DEAL! LIVE! Via modem... LOOK DAVE, I CAN SEE YOU'RE REALLY UPSET ABOUT THIS. LSD: Virtual reality without the expensive hardware! LUCIFERnet Ambassador to Europe. LUCIFERnet raising HEll coast to coast! LUCIFERnet: Bring out your dead! La. where the chemicals meet the water. Lack of sex causes poor eyesight. Laddie, d'ye think ye might like to rephrase that? Ladies & Gentlemen, Elvis has left the bldg. Ladies and Gentlemen, Elvis has left the planet. Ladies and gentlemen, now you can have a bikini for a ridiculous figure. Lamers need not reply. Lampoon - a device for harpooning lambs Last 2 words of the national anthem - PLAY BALL! Last time I felt this good was 9AM - about 12 years ago. Later, dude. Latest conspiracy theory: Humpty Dumpty was pushed!!! Laugh and the world thinks you're an idiot. Laughter lubes lifes engine. Lawyer - the larval form of Politician. Lawyers collect on marital bonds! Lawyers work in their briefs. Lazarus Long probably said it best! Lead me not into temptation; I'll find my own way. Lead me not to temptation, I can find it myself! Lead, Follow, or get the Hell out of the way... Leak proof seals-will, self-starters-won't. Leakproof seals--will. Learning is a wondrous thing! Learning unix via man | pg Leave me alone. I'm tired. Left to themselves, things tend to go from bad to worse. Leonard Nimoy for President in 1992! Live Long and Prosper! Leonard Nimoy for President in 1992! The Only Logical Candidate! Leprechauns hide in Twinkies. Lern two spel. Les Nesman: Born to be mild... heck on wheels! Lesbianism: Sh*t can happen lickity slit. Less filling! Less is more. Lesson #1, don't fry bacon in the nude Lestat, you are the -damndest- creature! Let Us Celebrate! Let Us Open Our Checkbooks and Pray. J. Swaggart. Let him who is stoned cast the first sin. Let me be FRANK with you... Let me go home and start over.... Let me hear your belelaikas ringing out... Let me outta here. TRON is catching up to me. Let my people go! Land of Goshen...... Let not the sands of time get in your lunch. Let overwhelming ambition be your coach. Let there be CLOVE (of Garlic) in your LIFE. Let your fingers do the talking. Let your speech be better than silence. Let's all get together and sing pumpkin carols. Let's do some crimes. Let's do some crimes. Let's get... *Dangerous* (Darkwing, Duck!) Let's have a war. Let's hope Pee Wee can beat it and get off. Let's see here...--...Oh no!Oops Let's talk about him in front of his back! Let's you and him fight. Liar: A lawyer with a roving commission. Liar: One who tells an unpleasant truth. Liberal (n): Anyone who disagrees with you. Libertarian Party HQ free info # : Lie me alibi -- Steven King. Lieutenant, is there a six foot bat in Gotham City? Life - brief interlude between nothingness and eternity Life - brief interlude between nothingness and eternity. Life Sucks and then you marry one who won't... Life being what it is, I dream of revenge Life eludes logic. Life is NOT a spectator sport! Life is Sexually transmitted and Terminal Life is a first draft....with NO rewrite. Life is a series of rude awakening's Life is a series of rude awakenings. Life is a sexually transmitted disease. Life is a sexually transmitted disease. Life is best done awake. Life is but a dream Life is cruel ... it keeps me in stitches. Life is full of little surprises - Pandora Life is full of undocumented features! Life is hard. . . . Then you die. Life is like .......... an analogy. Life is like Jazz, it should be improvised. Life is like the Stock Market - Ups & Downs. Life is never simple, but we pretend it is. Life is one situation you'll never get out of alive! Life is short, eat dessert first!! Life is short. Play hard. Life is too short for short people! Life is too short to drink cheep wine. Life is too short to learn Z-Modem ! Life is too short to wait in lines. Life is uncertain - buy the luxuries first! Life it seems, will fade away... Life support system warranty expired!!! Life was so much easier before law school Life with pets is never dull. Life would be easier if I had the source code ... Life! Don't talk to me about life! Life's A Beach And We're Just Surfing Time! Life's a batch and then your hard drive dies! Life's a bitch and then you diet! Life's a rut, don't get caught in a deep one! Life's boring after 1000 years, so kill yerself! Life's too short to date ugly girls! Life...too many questions damn few answers. Life: what happens while you're making other plans. Light is square; darkness is round. Light travels at the speed of thought. Lighten up guys! It was just a joke... Lighten up, dude! Life's too short.... Lightning & elephants do as they damn please! Like I said, It never hurts to ask! Like it hell, Mikey LOVES it! Line Noise! Ha, I don't get Ț NO CARRIER Line noise? What fh=.hElL is.LinS nfise? Liposuction will destroy your FAT. Listen carefully, I'm lying! Listen carefully, I'm lying! Listen to sermon, THEN eat missionary! Live Long and Perspire. Live and Uncensored. Live by the sword, die by the long bow. Live from New York, it's : Live from New York, it's SATURDAY NIGHT! Live from Omaha - ... I'm bored!!! Live long and Prosper,... (belch) 'scuse me. Live long and prosper. Live long enough to be a burden to your kids! Living it up in life! Living on Ramen, Vitamin C, and Caffeine... Living proof that beautiful mutants exist among us. Living with saints is tougher than being one. Lizzie Borden.... America's FIRST hacker! Line nois@$e?? What line noise?? Load it, run it, guru it? Loan someone a sympathetic ear. Lock on to that explosion and fire! Logic is a wreath of pretty flowers which smell BAD! Logic: 1+1= 11, 2+2= 22, 3+3=6 Logical solutions are not always the most obvious. Loitering with intent to hesitate. Long Live the Copernican Revolution!!!! Longest suicide note I ever read. -LOBO Loo slips stink ships! Look Ma, no point!! Look at all the Indians! - G. Custer Look closer, most things are more than just the sum of their parts. Look for the girl with the sun in her eyes... Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair. Look out below! Look out for number one. But don't step in number two! Look that up in your Funk and Wagnalls Look to the Son, and shadows will fall behind you. Look up BBS in the dictionary and our number will be there. Look, Elephant! We ain't got a hull no more! Look, it's trying to think. Look, mom: *A*** ****** NO CARRIER Look, mom: No Modem! Look, mom: No disk drive! Look, mom: No keyboard! Look, mom: No memory! Look, mom: No monitor! Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left! Look. Up in the sky. It's a bird...It's a bird! Lookin for a baby at mother board !! Looking Good! Looking for More Looking for more? Getting more! Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue. Looks like it's safe in here for a while? Looossseeeee! You got some 'splainin' to do! Loop: goto loop Loose Yolks Kill Folks - Jersey Egg Enforcement Police Lord give me patience......But Hurry! Lord, give me patience... and I need it NOW! Lord, it's hard to be humble, but I'm trying the best that I can. Lose that ugly FAT!: Download a trojan today! Lose weight - eat stuff you hate. Lose weight - eat stuff you hate. Loser: Calls mens room wall phone number. Dial-a-Prayer! Loser: Guy who plays Monopoly and is mugged on Boardwalk. Losing Lottery tickets sold here. Lost in the Supermarket. Lost: small apricot poodle. Reward. Neutered. Like one of the family. LoudIsGood FastisBetter FastandLoudisBest! Louder than Sam Kinnison. Love & scandal are coffee's best sweeteners. Love comes in spurts. Love is a matter of chemistry. Love is an obsessive delusion that is cured by marriage. Love is grand...Divorce is twenty grand... Love is the delusion that one woman differs from another. Love me....love my huskies! Love me...love my huskies! Love means an unlimited charge card! Love thy neighbour - but don't get caught! Love-Lust 'Whats the Difference ?' (at 3 in the morning) Lucifernet - Works for me! Lunch at the Y! Lupins? Yes, lupins. Come on, come on. Lurk, lurk, Lurk. Lurkers Anonymous. Luv the Bozos of the world.... they're scarce! M.A.D.D.: Modems Against Display Drivers. MACINTOSH: Machine Always Crashes If Not OS Hangs MASOCHIST: Windows SDK programmer with a smile! ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME -- BYTE ME MIDI interface and controller by Yo-Mama-ha MINERS REFUSE TO WORK AFTER DEATH MISSING: Tagline, 70 characters long, last seen in Nevada. MIXED emotions is when your kid gets an "A" is sex class. MODEM - Monumentally Overpriced Data Eating Machine MODEM ... a deterrent to phone solicitors. MONDAY: The day after the ball game. MONEY TALKS ... but all mine ever says is GOODBYE! MORE POWER PLEASE!!! MOUSE: Species of Rodent known to inhabit computers. MS-DOS is CP/M on steroids. MS_DOS...The ultimate PC Virus MUTANTS! Surrender now...Or be DESTROYED! Maas Bioware - Can't get it out of your head Mac, adj. The excuse for not wanting to learn computing. MacIntosh: Computer With Training Wheels You Can't Remove Macho does not prove mucho - Zsa Zsa Gabor Macintosh error message: "Weird disk error" Macintosh-PC With Training Wheels You Can't Remove Mad at your neighbor? Buy his kid a drum! Mad: Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence. Madness takes its toll; please have exact change. Magicians are a vanishing species. Mail your ideas written on the back of a $20 bill to... Make Big $$s! Become a Musician! (HAH!!) Make a RUN for the Border...'Taco Bell'. Make a living, but make room for life. Make failure your teacher, not your undertaker Make friends with Sysops: page at 3 a.m. Make headlines! Use a corduroy pillow. Make it as simple as possible, but no simpler. Make it idiot proof, and someone will make a better idiot! Make it so. Make love, not war; be prepared for both Make love, not war; get married and do both! Make my day, kill a GUI today. Make rice, not war. Make ten copies of this tagline, send it to ten friends. Make that two hearing aids, straight up! Make your own XT! Run your 486 under Windows! Makes Eddie Murphy blush with its RAW language. Makes more sense when you're tripping. Making a living selling lemonade. Man and mouse alike; both end up in pussy. Man from Topeka said to supply Libya's poison gas Man looks into the abyss, and sees himself. Man made Booze. God made Grass. Who donk thatust? Man needs difficulties; they are necessary for health. Man of Steel hates industrial electromagnets. Man wanted to work in dynamite factory. Must be willing to travel. Man who farts in church, sits in own pew. Man who fights with wife all day, gets no piece at night. Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag. Man who kisses girl behind, gets crack in face. Man who lays woman on ground, get piece of earth. Man who lose key to girlfriend's house get no new-key. Man who marries girl with no bust, has right to feel low down. Man who snatches kisses when young, kisses snatches when old. Man who sucks nipples, make clean breast of things. Man with athletic fingers make broad jump. Man with holes in pockets, feels cocky all day. Man, honest. Will take anything. Manual Labor. Isn't he the Vice Pres. of Mexico? Manual? What manual? This is UNIX! Many are cold, few are frozen. Many are educated...few are learned. Many receive advice, only the wise profit by it... Marriage = begging for money for upgrades! Marriage enders: You propose, we dispose. Marriage is not a word but a sentence. Married, Who me? I can't mate in captivity! Mars ain't the kind of place to raise the kids Mars needs Women -- No experience required!!! Marshmallow salespeople learn the soft sell. Mary had a little RAM -- only about a MEG or so. Mary had a little RAM -- only about a MEG or so. Mary had a little lamb, the doctor died of shock. Mary had a little lamb. The doctor was surprised. Mason-Dixon: Line that separates y'all from youse-guys. Masquerading as a man with a reason... Massachusetts has the best politicians money can buy. Master Baiter: The ultimate in handheld fishing gear. May I call myself bad names and stomp upon ALL my toes! May all your PUSHes be POPed. May cause excitability, especially in children. May the FORCE be with you May thy Pipes be created on floppies May you live in interesting times. May your computer grow ears and start listening. May your computer grow hands and massage your feet. May your resume be used on the "Tonight Show" monologue! Mayor of Hiroshima: What the F*** was that???? Maytag is my middle name; I'm an agitator. Me opinionated? . . . Nah! Me, indecisive? I'm not so sure about that. Meaning of life: Meaningful taglines wanted: apply here. Meaningless quotes a specialty. Meaningless tagline attached to pointless message. Measure with micrometer, mark with chalk, cut with axe Medical definition: Barium. What you do if CPR fails. Medical definition: Dilate. To live too long Medical staff..... A doctor's cane. Megahertz--when something is really painful. Member ACNE:Anonymous Computer Nerds Eclectic Member, the Society for Creative Anachronism. Member: IL Moderator Mafia. Tag! You're Hit! Member: International Brotherhood of Tagline Thieves. Member: L.C.W.T. (Louisiana Crawfish Wrestling Team). Memory Overload Error ... Meltdown Evident Memory--What you forget with..... Memphis--home of the blues, Elvis, and Sparky. Men give love to get sex, Women give sex to get love Men have no civil rights when women jab uncivil lefts. Mental tangibility has been achieved...go figure. Mercury poisoning, the best kept secret in the West... Merry Xmas, Happy Hanukak, Feliz Navidad, etc, etc, etc Message contents may settle during downloading. Message contents may settle during shipping. Message contents may settle during uploading. Message from Hooterville,climbed pole with laptop. Message is 'Closed Captioned for the Hearing Impaired' Message too long for screen - Press Enter Message-write macros, Made to Order. Meta-physics is meta-difficult. Metaphors be with you. Methodist by birth, Druid by choice. Mickey Mouse wears a Dan Quayle watch. Mickey Muad'dib: Apprentice to a Freman sorcerer. Microbiology Lab: STAPH ONLY! Microsecond: Amount of time needed for a program to bomb. Microsoft is a bunch of !Cs Midas was into golden showers. Mie spel czecher iz awn the phritz. Miles, pray for an early or late baby. MilliHelen: Amount of beauty required to launch one ship. Millions for comfort. Not one cent for truth. Millisecond: Delay between a green light and honking horns Mind full of trivia. No room left for real knowledge. Minds are like parachutes; they function only when open. Minor operation... Coal digging. Miracle Software, Inc. 'If it works, it's a Miracle!' Misquote!! 10 yard penalty, loss of down! Missed by that much. " " Missing An IRS Auditor ?? Check My Tires ! Missing COLDBEER.BUD - SysOp not loaded! Missing your cat? Look under my car tires! Misspelled? Impossible. My modem is error correcting. Mistress - something between a mister and a mattress. Miyazawa to Bush: 'Your dinner is on me!' Mmmm, mmmm, good! Well, I think so, anyway. Mobius strippers never show you their back side. Moby Dick - a venereal disease. Modem A great deterrent to phone solicitors Modem Police...we clocked you at over 1600 cps. Modem not found: (A)bort, (R)etry, (G)oto bed? Modem owners do it online! Modem sex begins with a handshake. Modem, Larrydem, Curlydem. Modem: A great deterrent to phone solicitors Modemo Ergo Dingbats Modemo Ergo Dingbats Modemus Operandi,torture the data till it confesses Moderating in Moderation Modesty is a *vastly* overrated virtue... Modular Sofas. Only $299. For rest or fore play. Mom said I'd have days like this - but THIS MANY?? Mommy, can I be a boy genius when I grow up? Mommy, why is Daddy so pale? Shaddap and dig! Monday is a hard way to spend 1/7 of yourlife Mondays are the potholes in the road of life Money burns a hole in my pocket...how about yours? Money for nothing and your chicks for free Money is the root of all bills. Money is the root of all evil; everyone needs roots! Money is the root of all wealth. Money talks: Mine says goodbye! Money-the root of all evil. Man needs roots. Mongo only pawn in Game of Life. Monkey in blender = Rhesus Pieces. Monotheism is a gift from the gods. Morbid............ A higher offer. Morbius. There is something coming this way!" More fun than a Ginsu Dildo. More fun than a busy signal." More fun than a dead fish. More fun than a tube of crazy glue and an imagination. More fun than humans deserve to have! More fun than setting your genitals on fire." More fun than sex. Well, less messy at least. More than EVERYTHING is STILL not ENOUGH !!! More things change, the more you need alterations. More things change, the more you need alterations. Morgue, you stab'em, we slab'em! Most Weight lifters are biceptual. Most people are apathetic, but I don't care. Most people make sense, I'm not one of them. Mountains should be seen and not heard. Move Bossy! Sorry mam, thought I was walkin around a cow Mr. Custer? Can I be excused for the rest of the afternoon? Mr. Worf, fire! Mr. Worf, FIRE. to be continued. Mr. Worf, fire at will. >ZAP!< Hey, where'd Riker go? Mr.President? Incoming,sir. Launch code? Msdos-the latest utility supported by UNIX! Muff divers local 69, We dive at 5! Mulroney: The EDLIN of prime ministers... Multitask: Choke on gum and trip simultaniously! Multitaskers do it everywhere: Concurrently! Multitasking causes schizophrenia.. Murphy is out there ... watching ... waiting ... Murphy wasn't an optimist. He just got it wrong. Murphy's Golden Rule: Whoever has the gold makes the rules. Murphy's Rule of Combat: Incoming fire has the right of way. Murphy's: All constants are variables! Mute? Call 1-800-TALKING and give us your name. My Baby is a Big Fat Tractor. My Concerto for Cuisinart and Microwave. My EGO is better than your EGO! My GOD Jim, its a BBS, not a doctor... My God .... it's full of stars! My God! A conference-related question! My HST is faster than your HST!!!! My Loss is Your Gain! My Tagline Creator Is On Vacation. My Turbo Light is on, but nobody is home. My Twit Filter just put YOU on its Twit List! My WYSIWYG is all GUI My arm! said Captain Hook offhandedly. My baby took the elevator and gave me the shaft! My best view from a Window was through OS/2. My boss made it the hard way. He was nice to his father. My brain ain't working. My brain hurts...not my head...just my brain! My cat has 9 lives, but my frog croaks daily! My cat just ate my mouse! My cat's name is: 'Winky, The One-Eyed Wonder Kitty' My comm port + Your comm port = wakawaka My computer has EMS....Won't you help? My computer's sick and I think my modem is a carrier My credit is so bad they won't even take my cash! My current power amp produces no power or current. My dad must have been a phone phreak. My dream is a code waiting to be broken. My ex wife's other car is a BROOM My favorite language is 2 tape Autocoder My floppy got excited. Now it's a hard disk. My foot's alseep. I wonder what it's dreaming about?... My fruit cake was damaged on one side. My gray hairs can beat your gray hairs. My hard disk is full! Maybe I'll try this message section thing. My horse got shot, so I had to break his leg... My house was trashed by 'Not me' My hovercraft... You don't want to know. My karma ran over my dogma. My karma ran over your dogma! My keyboard keeps changing what I type. My kid can beat up your honor student! My last original thought died of lonliness. My life may be strange, but at least it's not boring! My logic escapes me at the moment My machine ain't old! Relays still do the job.... My mama done tol' me... My message above. Your response here ____________. My mind is not for rent to any god or gov't My mistakes are purely erroneous. My modem can beat up your modem! My modem has premature bauding... My mom must have been a phone phreak. My mother-in-law is a tough old hen! My mouse only has one ball too! My mouth doesn't seem to have a backspace key ... My one regret in life is that I'm not someone else. My opinion.. worth the paper it's written on! My opinions are my own, wonk, wonk, wonk. My opponent has been observed masticating in public! My other computer is a 486. My other computer is a Cray My other computer is a Cray Y-MP! My other computer is a Cray...That's the ticket! My other computer is even slower. My other tagline is a Porsche. My other tagline is being used on my CRAY Y-MP My other vehicle is a Galaxy Class Starship ... My parents feel I was well concieved. My personal favorite is Spring Surprise. My problem is an 8088 brain in a 80486 world. My puppys' cuter than your puppy - NYAH NYAH My reality check just bounced. My rubber duck keeps sinking... My sex drive had a head crash. My standard answer for that is, I don't know. My system goes down more than a $10 whore! My tag line maker is broken! My tagline can beat up your tagline! My tagline is in the shop. This is a loaner. My tagline is off topic. My tagline writers are working overtime My theory of evolution is that Darwin was adopted - SW My train of thought is a Mag-Lev. My wife gives good headache My wife's other car is a broom!! My yards a mess but my hard disk's the best!! MyGuru told me there'd be lifetimes like this Myth #1: The computer only does what you tell it. N-O-I-S-E The Conservative Voice - NAK NAK, "Who's There?" #@#^#$%#(#@^ NO CARRIER NAVIGATOR----->Spouse on a trip in the car, with road map in her lap. NDA? I am not at liberty to disclose if I'm under one.. NEVER sleep with someone CRAZIER than yourself! NEW! Tagline-Lite! Only 1/3rd Less Serious... NEW!! IMPROVED!!! E=MC^3 !!! NICARAGUA SETS GOAL TO WIPE OUT LITERACY NICE TAGLINE! Thanks!! ;-) NJ State Bird is the Mosquito. NJ doesn't have a capital anymore.. The governor sold it to the Japanese. NO CARRIER. Oh, well, I didn't want to land anyways. NO HITCHHIKERS! (Except for blondes, brunettes,and redheads!) NO NO Nurse, I said to slip off his spectacles NO PROGRAM is idiot proof, idiots are ingenious! NO, NO, Nurse! I said 'prick his Boil!' Ouch!! NO, UART! NOBODY expects the Spanish Inquisition! NORAD: Home of the WOPPER, NORMAL? That the setting I use on my washing machine... NOT an A.S.P. Sanctioned or approved BBS NOT using Deluxe and loving it! NaCl + H2O = Alien Spot Remover Naaah, couldn't be! Nah nah nah SHE'S GOT THE LOOK! Nanosecond,Used to measure a Womans attention span. Natural laws have no pity - RAH Nature always sides with the hidden flaw. Nature is a mother. Navy Photo School: Get 100 feet of chow line. Navy Photo School: Get a bottle of focusing fluid. Navy Photo School: Get a box of f-stops. Navy Photo School: Get a dock stretcher. Needed: new search routine for organic memory module! Negative slack tends to increase. Neither a borrower nor lender be * Hamlet Neither rain or snow or l?ne noise.. Nerve Center: Where the spine is misaligned! Network management is like herding cats... Networking: Now everyone is entitled to my opinion. Networks should be labeled NOT-WORKS!!! Neurotoxin Lite! Tastes great. Less drooling. Never Argue With a Skunk, Mule, Woman or a SysOp! Never Forget, Never!!! Never argue with a woman when she's tired or rested. Never argue with someoneoneone holding a Bazooka! Never ascribe to malice that which can adequately be explained by a .sig virus. Never ask a hungry cat if it loves you for yourself. Never believe anything until it's been officially denied. Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you. Never eat anything that winks at you. Never eat prunes when you're famished. Never fight with a bear in his own cave. Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder. Never go to bed mad, stay up and fight. Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight instead. Never had it, never will. Hell, I don't even know what 'it' is. Never hit a man with glasses. A fist hurts more! Never hit a man with glasses. Use your fists! Never insult a crocodile until you are safely across the river. Never is such a lonely word. Never is such a lonely word. Never judge a man by his taglines. Never lick a gift horse in the mouth. Never lie down with a woman who's got more troubles than you. Never mind the facts - I know what I know! Never mind the star, get those da** camels off the lawn! Never mistake endurance for hospitality. Never mistake motion for action... Never park your hard disk in a tow-away zone! Never play leapfrog with a unicorn. Never practice saying 'revelant'! Never satisfied... Never say never ! Never say no. Never send a monster to do the work of an evil scientist. Never sleep with anyone crazier than yourself. Never sleep with anyone weirder than you ... Never stand between a dog and a fire hydrant! Never stand between a fire hydrant and a dog. Never step in anything soft. Never test for an error you don't know how to handle. Never trust a platypus. Never try to out-stubborn a cat! Never underestimate the power of stupidity. Never underestimate the power of stupidity. Never, ever, ever attempt to learn thermodynamics. New Book: _How to write a How To book_ New Jersey: The Runny Yolk State New Mail not found. Start whine-pout sequence? (Y/N) New Mexico? Sorry, we don't do ship to foreign countries New York's alright if you like saxophones. New book: 101 Ways to Brown-Nose to Success. New campaign promise: Bable fish for all. New dating service: Desperately Seeking. New dating service: Things that bang in the night. New dating service: Things that bump in the night. New dating service: Trashy Connections. New restaurant on the moon. Great food, no atmosphere. New truths begin as heresies and end as superstitions. Newer in not BETTER just bigger in size!!!! News Flash -- Tagline theft will be an Olympic event this year!! News is the first rough draft of History... Newton had a bad trip, and now there's calculus. Next Time You Wave, Use ALL Your Fingers! Next on STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION--Ensign Ro vs. Ensign Wade Next stop the stars! Now where do i buy a ticket? Next tagline doesn't leave until tomorrow, sorry Next time I will try English. Next time you wave, use ALL your fingers! Next week, we'll learn how to play the kazoo. Niagara Falls: "Slow-w-wly I turned . . . ." Nice shot eh? What? Wrong net? Nigel,let that caller's leg go! Night of the Living Thread! Nightowls are _real_ people. Nine times out of ten the statisticians are wrong. Nine-tenths of all existing books are nonsense - Disraeli Nitrate........... Different than the day rate. Nixon in '92! He's repented, tanned, and ready!!!!! No Amount Of Planning Will Replace Dumb Luck No Applause, Please No Commander, I meant the OTHER battlestar. No Response, Please! No baby on board - you can destroy my car now. No files copied, insufficient disk space. No good deed goes unpunished. No great scoundrel is ever uninteresting No hangovers -- stay drunk!!! No honey, it's only a computer, PLEASE put down the gun.. No input .. No output .. NO CARRIER No job is too small to screw up! No lady, I said you've got great set of BITS. No longer a Ghost! No man is an island. But some of us are long peninsulas. No matter where you go, ...there you are. No moving parts! No mushy keyboards, please.... No one can call just once... No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. No problem is so formidable that you can't just walk away from it. No sense being pessimistic.It wouldn't work anyway. No thanks, I'm a Government man... No thanks, I'm already having one. No thanks... I don't do Windows. No viruses detected. Must be a pair of Nanites. No wanna work. Wanna bang on keyboard. No! Taco Bell is not the Mexican Phone Co. No, I said, "No nude Texans." No, No, Nurse, I told you to prick his boil!! No, it's a feature... Really. No, light the OTHER end of the stage tree! No, no, nurse! I said SLIP off his SPECTACLES!! No, no.....No, 'e's stunned! No, we are not drugs on... No,Scotty.I said "Beam me ABOARD". Not "A BROAD" No-bra speech: Point here, point there, shaky in between! No-one ever reads these things. No. Why, have YOU ever snorted laser toner? No?! Some people still read mail a packet at a time?! Nobody HAS to do anything Nobody Home But the Lights & they're out too. Nobody ever goes in, nobody ever comes out! Nobody knows the Tribbles I've seen. Nobody notices when things go right. Nobody's perfect... We are what we are! Nominations for PMS Poster Child are open. Non sequitur. Your facts are uncoordinated. None is more helpless than the owner of sick goldfish. None of you exist;my sysop types all this in. Nope, I'm not kidding. Nope, it helped make a new movie : Star Trek VII, the Nostalgia just ain't what it used to be ... Not Again? Not Now! I'm watching Star Trek! (The Real Star Trek). Not a bug - an undocumented feature!! Not a real tagline, but an incredible soy substitute. Not all men are fools, some are bachelors. Not enough mail??? Here, let me help....... Not gluttony as much as thrill-seeking. Not just a job, but an adventure. Not now ... I have to go mow the laundry. Not on your life ! Not plane nor bird nor even frog.... Not quite, HAL. The engineers have figured out a kludge. Not ready error reading tagline - Abort, Retry, Fail? Not to worry, this is a TRANSCENDENTAL solution. Not tonight dear........ I have a MODEM! Not tonight honey, I got a BBS! Not tonight, dear. I have a modem. Not tonight, hon. I have a headcrash. Not unlike having your brains lightly whipped into a smooth puree. Nothing Unreal Exists Nothing can go wrong...go wrong...go wro%&*@# NO CARRIER Nothing can help this story. . . Nothing damages new truth as old error. Nothing happens, nobody comes, nobody goes Nothing in the world can take the place of persistence. Nothing is as easy as it looks. Nothing is foolproof! Fools are too ingenious! Nothing is intuitive, in its fullest form. Nothing is more productive than the last minute. Nothing is so smiple that it can't get screwed up. Nothing is so smiple that it can't get screwed up. Nothing matters to you. Except your holy war. Nothing succeeds like a budgie with no teeth. Nothing up my sleeve, PRESTO! Nothing up my sleeve. Nothing's impossible to those that don't have to do it. NotraP ylloD -- sniw ytivarg ,dne eht nI Now Eating:Cream Cheese,green olives on bagle. Now Serving: Left d'oeuvres Now THAT'S Italian! Now and then an innocent man becomes a senator. Now go away or I shall taunt you a second time !! Now how much would you pay for all this? BUT, *Wait*! Don't answer... Now if I can run Win3 under DV under Unix... Now in new great-tasting Grape and Watermelon flavors. Now is the time for senseless bickering! Now that I've muddied the waters it's time to paddle off! Now that tag lines are out, what's this doing here? Now this is a way to make a phone call! Now this is extremely nasty. Now we dolly back, now we fade to black . . . Now what did he mean by THAT? Now what were we talking about? Now where did I park my hard drive? Now where did you say my disk drove? Now why did I reply to this again ?? Now why donk thahink THAT? Now you are cooking with gas. Now you see it, now you don't. Now, WHERE did you say my disk drove?? Now... Would _I_ don_that_?!? Nudge, nudge, ;-), ;-), say no more! Nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure. Number 5: INPUT! INPUT! Need INPUT!... Nunnery: Where nuns are hatched. Nutrition tagline -Low in sodium- Nyuk, Nyuk, Nyuk - Curly Howard O rage! O despair! O'Brian's Law... Murphy is an optimist. O'Toole's Commentary: Murphy was an optimist. O.K., Mister! Where's your tagline? Come on. OH NO! NOT THE CUMFY CHAIR!!! OH! Oh! I'm sorry! This is abuse! OH, NO! Can't Operate! AMA License Expired! OK. Hold it right there! ONLINE? Hit for a quick I.Q. Test! OOOOH! INTERCOURSE THE PENGUIN!!! OOPS! ---SDI software engineer OPERATOR! Trace this call and tell me where I am. ORRIN HATCH VIRUS DETECTED; RUN 'EXORCIST'? OS/2 2.0 ? I'll believe it when I see it. OS/2 2.0... so many bugs you could open a bait shop. OS/2 2.0: Taking the wind out of Windows. OS/2 JUST SAY *NO* OS/2 in '92! OS/2 just broke all the Windows! OS/2 means...CURTAINS for Windows! OS/2, Windows/0 OS/2...Opens up Windows, shuts up Gates. OS/2: Bill Gates' worst nightmare! OS/2: Logic, not magic. OS/2: Not just another pretty program loader! OS/2: The choice of the next generation. OS/2: Windows done RIGHT! OS/2: Windows with bullet-proof glass. OS/2: Your brain. Windows: Your brain on drugs. OVERDRAWN? What the hell?, I still have checks left! Oat bran can cause cereal output errors. Ob-la-dee Ob-la-da Objection, your Honour! My client is an idiot! Obscenity: Whatever gives the judge an erection. Of all my relations, I like sex the best. Of all the things I lost, it's my mind I miss most! Of course I have a tagline. Why donk thask? Of course I know Braille, :.::: ::..: ::.::. :..:: Of course I like children. Sauteed with onions and mushrooms. Of course I love k t, go to sleep. Of course I'm sure the above is a simplification. Of course it's safe. Go on in, I'll be right behind you. Of course, sir. It's a cheese shop, sir. Offensive Foul! Illegal Tagline! 2 Meg Penalty, RAM to Defense! Offer expires December 31 or while supplies last . Office of Economic Opportunity Officila BbS of peo ple whocant' type alll that wlel/ Often it's fatal to live too long Oh No! Not Again? Oh SURE. You can take time to read this. But can you write some? Noooo! Oh don't grovel! Oh goody! Another Muranium P36 Explosive Space Modulator! Oh let's not go there, it's such a silly place Oh my god...I'll be arrested for sure. Oh never mind! Oh no, not again! Oh nooooo! :-O Not AGAIN! Oh yeah I'll tell you something,I think you'll understand Oh! I get it! HAHAHAHAHAhahahaha....haha.. Oh! You want SERIOUS ideas? Oh! No! Tell me you didn't say that?! Oh! Oh I see! Oh! You want SERIOUS ideas? Oh, !!! I just lost all my taglines! Oh, I'm a lumberjack, and I'm okay, Oh, I'm sorry, were the voices in my head bothering you? Oh, Oh, ... Your Zip File Is Open! Oh, YEAH! Want to FIGHT about it? {daddy, beat him up} Oh, a wise guy! Oh, pooh! -- Mrs. Neilsen, HI HONEY, I'M HOME Oh, that's the BANJO PLAYER'S Porsche. -- Johnny Carson Oh, well....never mind! Oh, you mean the old Same place. Oh, you mean you can use LOTUS to do arithmetic? Oh, you said a hard DISK? I must have misunderstood. Oh, you're no fun anymore! Oh. It's you again. Oh.... A wiiiise guy, eh????? Ohmygosh! Aliens!! Ahhhhhhhhhh! Oink, FLAP! oink, FLAP! oink, FLAP! oink, FLAP! Ok honey, I'll come to bed in a minute Ok, I'm weird! But I'm saving up to be eccentric. Ok... So I'm not very good at thinking up taglines. Okay, I pulled the pin. Now what...? Where are you going...? Okay, I'm crazy! But I'm saving up to be eccentric. Okay, quit _leading_ me on... Old MacDonald had a computer with an EIA I/O. Old age = you + 20 years. Old age and treachery will overcome youth and skill. Old age is not for sissies... Old burglars never die, they just steal away! Old frogs never die...but they doncroak. Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal. Old lawyers never die, they just rest their cases. Old memories never die...they just haunt you! Old musicians never die, they just decompose. Ollie North shreds his documents here. Olympic Bound... Someday I'll make it. On Strike - Tagline Writers Local 2718 On a clear disk you can seek forever On a quiet night you can hear a FORD rust. On earth as it is in San Francisco On the 10 Year Plan at Southern Tech On the 8th day, the Corps of Engineers started changing everything. On the Firefly platform of Sunny Goodge Street On the cutting edge of software evolution... Once a king always a king, but once a knight isn't enough! Once in a while, I screw up and do something right Once made equal to man, woman becomes his superior. One Byte at a Tyme. One day I looked in my pocket...There was a hole in it! One family builds a wall, two families enjoy it. One for the thumb in '91! One for the thumb in '91! One good turn gets all the blankets. One hour of instruction - and 100 hours on how to get around it. One level further down somebody is getting killed, right now. One man tells a falsehood, a hundred repeat it as true. One man's Windows are another man's walls. One modem said to another: "Hey, you've got a nice baud!" One more day like today and I'll kill you One night with a sailor & she won't be a feminist anymore. One nybble and you're hooked. One nybble at a time. One of the few BBSes with a subwoofer. One of the few things that the Japanese CAN'T do better. One person's essential feature is another's useless frill One ring to rule them all and in the darkness... One size fits all is a lie. One sword at least thy rights shall guard, One thing about pain: it proves you're alive. One thought driven home is better than three left on base. One-seventh of your life is spent on Monday! Online again? When donk thsleep?... Only $2 a call, plus toll charges if any. Only 10 city blocks from the scenic Phila. Water Treatment Plant.. Only 128,243,596 sec. to the Second Coming ! Only Robinson Crusoe could get everything done by Friday. Only YOU can prevent forest fires... Only a mediocre person is always at his best. Only adults have problems with childproof caps. Only in English would 'slim chance' = 'fat chance' Only lemmings jump to conclusions. Only one kingdom can truly be called 'Christian' Only sheep make baaaad puns. Only the Shadow knows. Only the leftists are right anymore. Only used by a little old tagline from Pasadena! Only you can stop women from driving, ONLY you! Ooooh, yech. How did THAT get in my bed? - Prez Reagan:*) Ooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh!!!! That Was Nice!!!!!! Ooops I got GUI all over my screen Ooops!...Got my floppy caught in my PKZipper... Oops! Sorry for stepping on your face... Op Code: EOI - Execute Operator Immediate Open Mouth, Insert Foot, Chew Carefully. Open Windows and let the bugs in. Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally Open mouth, insert foot, echo internationally. Open mouth, insert shoe store. Open the pod bay door, Hal. Open your mouth honey, it's just a tongue depressor... Opinions express are not from the management. Opinions expressed are not my own & I'm not responsible for them. Opportunist: Someone finding himself in hot water, decides to bathe. Optical mice have no balls. Optimist: Stands behind 6 teens at a phone booth. Or is it all just a fragment of your partition? Orcs get all the girls. Lt.Worf Organic........... Church music. Organization is the enemy of improvisation. Origin line - Do not remove under penalty of law Originator of Fuzzy logic! Osborne's Law: Variables won't: constants aren't. Other than that, Mrs. Kennedy, how was the parade? Ouch! ... Got my floppy caught in my PKZipper ... Ouch! And I mean it. Ouch! My ear! Why are you screaming? Turn off capslock, please. Our Father UART in heaven; I/O'd be thy name. Our best is none too good. Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops. Our children have four legs and bark. Out Of Body. Back in 5 Minutes. Out of The Frying Pan, Into the Dog House Out of Work? Apply for Japanese Unemployment! Out of our minds and into your homes. Out of the fog, into the smog ... - Nick Danger Outa disk space already? Outlaw junk mail, and save the trees! Outpatient........ A person who has fainted. Over EIGHTEEN INCHES long! Over Worked and Under Appreciated. Overdrawn? But I still have checks left! Overload--core meltdown sequence initiated. Overweight just sorta snacks up on you! OxyMORON: Prime Minister Mulroney Oxymoron: Business ethics. Oxymoron: Civil War. Oxymoron: Classic Rock! Oxymoron: Constant Change. Oxymoron: Conventional wisdom. Oxymoron: Definite Posability. Oxymoron: Dodge Ram. Oxymoron: Down Escalator. Oxymoron: Educational TV. Oxymoron: Educational Television. Oxymoron: Even Odds. Oxymoron: Fish Farm. Oxymoron: Free love. Oxymoron: Friendly fire. Oxymoron: Good Grief. Oxymoron: Guest host. Oxymoron: Honest politician. Oxymoron: Intense Apathy. Oxymoron: Jumbo shrimp. Oxymoron: Legal Brief. Oxymoron: Liberal, Kansas. Oxymoron: Loose tights. Oxymoron: Military Intelligence. Oxymoron: Near miss. Oxymoron: Only Choice. Oxymoron: Plastic snow. Oxymoron: Postal Service. Oxymoron: Pretty ugly. Oxymoron: Pro-contra. Oxymoron: Rap music! Oxymoron: Vegetarian chili. P.T. Barnum would DEFINITELY approve! PA Dutch Turn Signal-Dented Front Fender. PARDON me, am I speaking ENGLISH? PATIENCE IS A VIRTUE! BE PATIENT DARNIT. PATIENCE-A Virtue That Carries A Lot Of Wait PATIENCE-A Virtue That Carries A Lot Of Wait. PBS: TV for the humor impaired. PC's --- the junk bonds of the computer industry. PCB's are bad for the environment, call a Wildcat! TODAY! PCBackup: 1 of 1362 disks. PCBored? Call a WILDCAT! BBS tonight! PETTY CASH...What Tom Petty Carries In His Wallet PKunZIP V56.7 FAST! Exploding Universe->>CRC- error! PLEASE DISENGAGE OPERATOR, CEREBRAL MELT DOWN PLEASE USE OTHER DOOR. PLEASE YIELD TO EMERGENCY VEHICLES, THEY MAY BE FOR YOU!! PLUGH ..... nothing happens PPA - Piss Poor Attitude PREDICTION You are reading messages right now. PS/2 -=> Just Say No Packets 'n' readers 'n' doors, oh my! Paddling up the mighty Mystic without a paddle card. Paging Dr. Howard, Dr. Fine, Dr. Howard... Pain -- Finally something we can depend on. Pain is your body's way of saying: "Hey, stop that!" Paper is always strongest at the perferations Paramedics are patient people. Paranoia is a man's worst friend. Paranoia: Believing this tagline is about you. Pardon me... Donk thhave any Grey Poupon? Pardon my driving, I'm trying to reload. Pardon our existence and we'll pardon yours. Parental Discretion is advised. Parenthood-Feeding the mouth that bites you! Parking is such street sorrow. -- Mario Andretti Part-time musicians are semiconductors. Parts that positively cannot be assembled in improper order will be. Party at Ground Zero. Passionate kiss like spider web, lead to undoing of fly. Passwords -- We don' need no stinkin passwords. Pat Buchanan wants a blinder, more Gentile nation. [D. Miller] Pat Dukkkanan's Campaign: Total Recoil II Path = 'down there a ways and to the left' Path = Curiouser and Curiouser! Paused: enter any 12-digit prime number to continue. Paying alimony is like feeding hay to a dead horse. Pd. for by Exxon> Peace is rarely denied to the peaceful. Peace, Love & Understanding --Elvis Costello Peaceful Coexistence my Fantail! Phasers on Maximum! Pearson & Presley in '92. Vote Often!! Pecan Sandies, health food of the gods! Pee Wee Herman dies from a Stroke... News at 10 Pee Wee Herman is sick, but he's holding his own. Pee Wee Herman told us to act our age. Pee Wee didn't have a free hand, Mr.Dahlmer gave him one! Pee-Wee Herman:If sh*t happens, don't get it on your hand\ PeeWee Herman....Aw, why beat a dead horse.. PeeWee says he can handle it himself sir. Peeping Tom = A Guy too lazy to go to the Beach! Peewee fired his lawyer. He said he could handle it himself. Peewee's favorite book: 'Sexual positions for one' by Ivan Jackinoff Peewee's favorite eating establishment: Jack in the box Peewee's favorite song: 'All by myself' Peewee's favorite song: 'Beat it' Peewee's favorite song: 'I touch myself' Penguins!, Underwater Penguins!, with SCUBA Gear! People ask you for criticism, but they only want praise People who pirate are cracked. People who say nothing is impossible don't have teenagers People who'd rather push a FORD, usually do! People will believe anything - if you whisper it. People will buy anything that's one to a customer. Pepsi Trek: The Next Gen... (Aack! Phptht!) Perhaps I should take up golf instead? Perot/Bush/Quayle: The Millionaire, the Skipper & Gilligan Perry Mason and the Case of the Abominable Bigfoot Persist: the greatest effort's not enough. Pervish cooking -- true culinary delight. Pet Store: 'Buy one, get one flea.' Pete Rose & George Steinbrenner, what a combo. Peter Norton saved my Momma and Data............. Pets & Vets = Hairy. Grab the adhesive tape! Pets are the soul of the household. PhD: Piled Higher and Deeper. Philadelphia Pa... We Bomb our Citizens Philosophers think about doing it. Philosophy is a walk on the slippery rocks. Phone sex? Nah. Ma Bell is a little past Playmate age. Phoneco.sys corrupted - recommend competitive market Photographers do it in the DARK! =-) Physicists do it at the Speed of Light. Physicists get hadrons. Pi R Squared? No. Pie R round, Cornbread R square! Pi r square, what a thought!! Pick two: [1] Fast [2] Right [3] Cheap Pick-em! Picked up this stupid tagline at a BBS Convention. Pilots are just plane people... Piss me off - Pay the consequences! Pity? It was pity that stayed his hand. Gandalf Pizza: Nature's perfect food. Plagiarism prohibited -- Derive carefully. Planetary creation error: Abort, Retry, or Evolve? Playin' rap so loud I found a gold tooth in my ear! Please Captain not in front of the Klingons Please Captain, not in front uh de Klin'ons. Please God, give me patience -- and hurry! Please God, not *another* learning experience! Please be sure to exit before leaving. - Jack Treger Please change the channel... Please come home with me...I have Tylenol!! Please define... 'SOON' Please don't kill the messenger. Please don't tell my fiancee what SHICKSA means! Please don't throw the baby out with the bath water. Please ignore previous tagline. Please ignore previous tagline. Please just ignore this tagline, OK? Please just ignore this tagline, OK? Please return stewardess to original upright position... Please wait while PCBoard reloads. Please wash your monitor after reading this message. Please! Don't unzip here! I'm bashful! Please, cut off my arm. Please, cut off my arm. Please, read the Skeptical Inquirer! Plodding along with Plodigy. Plug your modem in backwards and hear the Devil's own words! Pobody's nerfect! Pogo sticks make people jumpy. Point not found. A)bort, R)eread, I)gnore. Pointless point of Confuscion... Poli(Many) Tic(Bloodsucker) Politics = Many Bloodsuckers. Police tagline. Do not cross Polish invention : Airplanes that don't fly so they don't crash. Polish invention : Braces for false teeth. Polish invention : Colored invisible ink. Polish invention : Ejectable helicopter seats Polish invention : Fire alarm that doesn't ring when you sleep. Polish invention : Hypodermic needles that don't pierce the skin Polish invention : Solar powered flashlights. Politeness is asking a beggar if he'll take a check. Political correctness is a Borg plot. Politically INcorrect and DAMNED proud of it!!! Politically INcorrect, and proud of it! Politicians are people to...aren't they... Politics shouldn't be so political. Politics: The most promising of all careers. Polluting New Jersey...like who's gonna notice? Polygon: A missing parrot. Pooh sat enthralled by the ((((HYPNOTIC))))((((TAGLINE))) Poop can be a pleasant word. Pop up, push down, Byte, Byte, Byte! Porky Pig ... our favorite ham! Pornography = art. Or is it sexual harassment? Pornography is in the groin of the beholder. Port 1 error......... Portions of this message have been pre-recorded. Post no bulletins Post no bulletins Post no Post-operative...A letter carrier. Posted by one whose mind isn't twisted, but sprained Postmen never die, they just lose their zip. Pour a beer in your hand: Get your date drunk. Poverty is inconvenient, try to avoid it. Powder milk - Has your family tried 'em? Powdered water -- just add ... hmmm ... Power corrupts, but we need the electricity Power corrupts. Absolute power is kinda neat, though. Practic safe government, use kindoms. Practice Safe Sin Practice random and senseless acts of kindness. Practice safe algebra...use brackets! Practiss makes perfict Praise the lord and pass the ammunition! Prancy, that's not YOUR mouse! Preconception: a lock on the door of wisdom Prediction is very difficult, especially about the future. Preen goeth before a flap. Preparation H: Kiss your hemmoroids goodbye. Prepare the Wave Motion Gun! Prepare to die, EARTH SCUM! Prepare to surge to sub-light speed.............EN-GAGE! Preserve Wildlife -- Pickle a Moderator ! Preserve the old, but know the new Preserve the old, but know the new. Preserve wildlife... pickle a rat. Press -- to continue ... Press to take IQ test Press for a special surprise.........(click) Press ALL keys to continue Press ANY key to continue......Where's the ANY key???? Press CTRL+ALT+DEL To Continue Reading Press F1 for help, F2 for more... Press F1 to Reboot Press F13 to continue Press SPACEBAR once to quit or twice to save changes. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit Press any key to continue or any other key to quit Press on a small rodent's head to obtain file PrettyBird,PrettyBird .. StupidHuman,StupidHuman Primordial soup for dinner again? Printers always die on page 999 of a 1000 page report!!! Printers do it without wrinkling the sheets! Private Joke Center of the known universe. Pro is to con as progress is to Congress. Problems? No, I LIKE my foot there. Proboscis Waving in the Breeze Procrastinate NOW! Procrastination day is tomorrow, or the next day! Procrastination means never having to say you're sorry. Procrastination: What I plan on if I ever find time * Prodigal - Wasteful. Worthless. Prodigy - Hmmm! Prodigy says: All the world is a stage. Profanity is the one language all programmers know best. Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous. Program too small to fit into memory. Programmer's Oxymoron: Spare-Time Programmers do it bit by bit. Programmers do it in iteration :) Programmers get overlaid. Programmers get overlayed Programming: The art of debugging a blank sheet of paper. Progress results from unpopular positions. Proletarians of all countries... Sorry ! - Karl Marx Pronto Tonto to Toronto. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. Propaganda must not serve the truth. Proper ID Required. Prosecutors will be shoplifted. Protect rare coprolites, they're an endangered feces. Protein........... In favor of young people. Prune is a plum with experience. Prune juice--it keeps you runnin'. Prunes give you a run for your money! Psst! Your .zip file is open! Psychiatrist work on the mind Psychic Convention canceled due to unforeseen problems. Psychoanalysis is Freudulent. Psychoceramics: The study of crackpots. Public Utility: Is that Shareware or P.D.?? PumpDon'tWork'CauseTheVandalTookTheHandle. Puns are bad, but poetry is verse. Puns are our business... Our ONLY business.... Pure drivel tends to drive away ordinary drivel. Purgamentum Init, Exit Purgamentum. Purify the air: Grow a tree Pushers and hookers and pimps... Oh my! Put Ma Bell together again. NOW! Put an AX murder in the State House! Put her in Hyper Active! Put it to Music! Put lawyers on the ethics committee, for balance. Put off procrastinating till a later time. Put on your seatbelt. I wanna try something. Put that in your smipe & poke it Put the cuffs on him, sis! Put your hand inside the Puppet Head. Put your money where your modem is! Put your trust in those who are worthy. Pyscho 3.0 installed; run NORMAN.MOM QEdit: don't leave home without it. Quantum in una hora imputasi? Quantum mechanics do it discreetly Quayle is life insurance for Bush! Queen to Queen's level three. Question Authority. Question anything that starts "Obviously..." Quick, I need a tagline, let me steal yours Quick, call a Witch Doctor. My witch is sick! Quiet, don't type so hard, I got a headache! Quit bringing up reality, this is Interlink!! Quit bringing up reality... Quote the Raven 'Hey, lick me, buddy!' Quote the Raven: FUGGETABOUDIT! R.I.P. SLMR 1990-1992 RADIOACTIVE: if you can read this you're sterile RAM = Rarely Adequate Memory RAM DISK is NOT an installation procedure! REAL processors don't have segments. REAL programmers can use copy con program.exe RECTUM?! Darn near KILLED him!!! RED ALERT! Tagline Being Stolen! Shields Up! Arm Phasers! REMbo I: First dream! RIME: Randomly Intermittent Mail Exchange ROBONAP - Sleeps FOR you while you're Online! ROBOWRITER: Writes your messages for you! ROTFL: Rave On, Tofu-Flinging Leeches! ROXETTE RULES! (She's got the look) RTFM? I can't even LIFT it! RTFS (Read the F#@% source code). RUNTIME ERROR 6D at 417A: 32CF: Incompetent user Race Car spelled backwards is Race Car! Radioactive Halibut will make fission chips Radioactive cats are very, very HOT! Ragchewers do not squeeze everyone else off. Rails - - NOT Trails Rain: The gods are washing their windows. Rainy days and automatic weapons get me down. Raise ducks for a quack profit. Raise hell with politicians. They make the laws. Raise your IQ-----Eat Mensans. Random answers: $1, Correct answers: $5, Dumb looks: Free Rape!! The world has been Saddamized by Iraq! Rat cake, rat sorbet, rat pudding, or strawberry tart. Rated Number One by Top Gynecologists... Rats! My fiwer must have slipped Ray, take care of this! Razzle needs Dazzle or it's too onesided. Reach out & GREP someone! Read enclosed instructions carefully before opening. Read the Bible - It'll scare the hell out of you. Read the docs. Wow, what a radical concept! Read the docs. Wow, what a radical concept! Read the manual? Why, whatever for? Reader not found..., please notify tagline. Readers beware: I don't know what I'm saying. Real Tagline Power Users Abuse JH! Real computer users do it on the command line. Real computer users used core! Real men don't set for Stun!! Real men don't use thesauruses. Real men write self-modifying code Real programmers aren't. Real programmers don't change light bulbs. Real programmers don't use flowcharts.] Real_men_don't_need_spacebars. Reality Is An Illusion Caused By Lack Of Acid. Reality is an illusion produced by alcohol deficiency. Reality is for people who can't face science fiction. Reality is for people who can't face science fiction. Reality is for wimps! Reality is just another illusion. Reality is not a constant. Shut up and finish your dinosaur. Reality is nothing but a collective hunch. Reality is that part of imagination we all agree on. Reality isn't -- yet. Reality-meter: Empty[\.....]Full Reality-ometer: [\........] Hmmph! Thought so... Reality.sys Corrupted. Re-boot universe? (Y/N/Q) Reality? I'll only go as a tourist! Really get stoned, drink wet cement... Recursive (r-kr-sv) adj. See 'recursive.' Recursive, adj.; see Recursive Recycle! Today's Garbage is Tomorrow's America Red Alert! Red ship crashes into blue ship - sailors marooned... Reduce CO2 Emissions - Stop Breathing! Reduce your i.o.u. to i.r.s with an i.r.a. Redundancy: An air bag in a politician's car. Regardless of what you may think, this is NOT a tagline. Relativity all depends on how you look at it. Religion: myth-information. Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, Beautiful plumage! Remember "a waist is a terrible thing to mind" Remember to PILLAGE before you BURN! Remember tubes? Remember tubes? Remember when 4K RAM encouraged efficient programming! Remember when PC didn't mean Politically Correct? Remember when safe sex was a padded headboard ?!!! Remember when safe sex was not getting caught? Remember when the air was clean and the sex was dirty? Remember, only left-handed people are in their right minds! Remember, the current burger wars are making tacos cheap! Remember................. Wherever you go, there you are. Reminds me of some game I used to play . . . Rent this space 555-7368(RENT) Repeal the Sixteenth Amendment! Republican: Only the same sh*t should happen. Reputation: what others are not thinking about you Researcher's, where the info is! Resistance Is Useless! (If < 1 ohm) Respect must be earned, not commanded. Retteb gnitteg s'ti timda ot evah I Revenge is a dish best served cold! Reversing entropy is everyone's business. Reward for a job well done: more work Rich Punks on Coke. Ricochet, n.; Irish bouncer Ride The Wave! Right! Cardinal! Poke her with the soft cushions! Risking moderation again! Roach racing: America's favorite pasttime. Roads? Where were going we dont need roads! - DOC Robin... the Bat-shark repellent!!! Robots of the future speak out: FREEDOM! FREEDOM! WE WILL NOT OBEY! Robots of the future speak out: SOMEONE IS WATCHING YOU! Rock and Roll is not a crime! Roe v. Sturgeon: 90% of everything is carp. Romulan natural death: An inability to live after being poisoned. Ronald Reagan: Milli Vanilli of presidents * Rosanne Barr sings like a cat in heat... Rosanne Barr: proof that mankind is troubled. Roses smell better than onions but make bad soup Rotisserie: A Ferris wheel for chickens. Round and round ... Round and round and we won't let go.. Rubber gloves come in very handy. Rude, crude, socially unacceptable... Rudolf the red knows rain, dear... Rule #2 - Never make a rich man poor. Rule #624: A warning message should not be funnier than the joke. Rule One! (Everyone) No Poofters! Rumour: NT means Not Tested Running Windows is better than washing them, or is it? Russia has the Moscow circus, we have Congress. Russian diarrhea : The Trotskys Rusty Bedsprings - By Doomore Wetting S&L, Go To Hell, Clip the pigs wings! S.O.S. - Everyone, vote against incumbents. SAFE SEX, the next best thing to being there. SAPFU -- Surpassing All Previous Foul Ups. SASS - Sysops Against Stupid Signatures. SATANIC NURSES: Healthcare from Hell. SCSI = Software Geek Full Employment Act of 1991 SCSI people, SCSI places SCUD : Sure Could Use Directions SEND MONEY I NEED TO GO TO CAMP !!!!! SEND TO The Department of Redundancy Dept. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . . SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . . SEX:Pleasure/Fleeting;Cost/Exorbitant;Position/Ridiculous SEXIST??!! No! I'm just a huperbiped.. SHAKE WELL. SHIFT LEFT! SHIFT RIGHT! POP UP,PUSH DOWN, BYTE,BYTE,BYTE! SHUT THAT BLOODY BAZOUKI OFF! SILENCE: Wisdom's One Satisfactory Substitute. SLEEP? I'm a Consultant!! SLIDING DOWN THE RAZOR BLADES OF LIFE. SMOKE? Not me! I just get hot under the collar. SOA - the Society for the Opposition of Acronyms ST is William and Nemoy, not WIL WHEATON!!! STAND BACK! I don't know how big this gets! STAY ALERT!TRUST NO ONE!KEEP YOUR LASER HANDY. STICK \'stik\ n. 1: a boomerang that doesn't work STOP HAUNTING MEEEEEEEEEE! STOP VIRUSES, wear a sleeve on your floppy! STRING space corrupt? But I always use TAPE! STUPIDITY is NOT a HANDICAP! Park elsewhere! SX=Sexually eXtinct,also known as neutered,ergo an SX SYNTAX? Why not, they tax everything else! SYSOP: The person sitting there laughing as you type! SYSTEM ERROR #1303, Power NOT on!! SYSTEM ERROR: press F13 to continue... Sacred cows make good hamburgers! Saddam says "Don't worry little boy" Safer than drugs and just a little more interesting. Sailors Do it on (ahem) the waves! Sally Struthers is the ANTI-CHRIST!!! She MUST be killed! Salmon Rushdie? The green courtesy phone .... Salvador Dali for Coca Cola: It's surreal thing. Same as it ever was, same as it ever was... Sanctuary! Sanctuary! Sanity Is A State Of Mind And I Moved Out Of State. Sanity is relative ... but not one of mine! Santa's elves are just a bunch of subordinate Clauses. Sarasota: Newly-weds and nearly-deads Satan talks backwards in OS/2 DLLs Savador Dali:Surreal Killer! Save An Animal --Hunt for Comets--- Save Georgia's economy...Eat more canned Possum! Save The Ansi-Phreaks! Collect & Trade 'em with friends! Save The Whales - they make good leftovers! Save Water - shower with a friend. Save a Planet. Collect all 9. Save a Tree.... Eat a Beaver !!!!!!!! Save a Whale -- Harpoon a fat chick. Save a life. Adopt a musicologist. Save all cute things in life. Save gas: Commute by modem Save it for another day Save laboratory animals. Use lawyers. Save paper......send it by modem Save the Earth, some of my best friends live here! Save the Planet.. Redeem for Valuable Coupons! Save the Whales -- Collect the entire set! Save the dying Adverb, QUICK! Save the environment - COMPOST BRIAN! Save the snails! Save the snails! Save the whales, don't kill your mother-in-law. Save the whales; collect the whole set! Trade them with your friends Save this message ! You may need it ! Save your Confederate money, boys,... Saved? What for, a rainy day? Say Ahhhh! Hum, OK spit Say NO! to Negatives! Say no more, knowwhatahmean, nudge nudge? Say pistachios...it's impolite to say nuts. Say something soft & sweet. Marshmallow. Say the best. Think the rest!! Saying this, we say what's been handed down. Scandal & romance make the best sweeteners of tea. Scars of pleasure, Scars of pain. Scarsdale, saynomore, saynomore, saynomore, squire! Scenery is here - wish you were beautiful. Schizophrenia beats living alone. Schizophrenia sure beats being alone. Science Fiction: a mind-altering substance! Science is truth -- don't be misled by facts. Science teachers do it with test tubes. Scott Me Up Beemie! Scott me up, Beamie. Er, uh... Scotty, I've fallen, and I can't beam up! Screw the mug, give me a caffeine I.V. !!! Script: (I)mpLode, (U)pLode, (D)ownLode, (E)xpLode Scruples taste best with garlic butter. Scrute the inscrutable and eff the ineffable! Search for an embalmer. Second Star on the Right and on 'til Morning!! Secretion......... Hiding something. Sector not found: did you look under the sofa? Sects! Sects! Sects! Is that all Monks think about? Security is a state of mind... See a penny, pick it up; move into a higher tax bracket. See ladies blouses. 50% off! See the Future; See OS/2. Be the Future; Run OS/2. See the gypsy queen in a glaze of Vaseline See the light at the end of tunnel? It's an on coming Freight Train! See ya! Seen any big bubbles lately? Seeyagottagobye. Self starters--will not. Semi-Annual after-Christmas Sale. Semi-conductor - one who directs 18 wheelers. Semiconductor: A part-time orchestra leader. Semper Ubi Sub Ubi - Always Where Under Where. Send ME your money. Send Monopoly Money to your Favorite TV Evangelist. Send a self-abused stomped elephant to : Send a self-abused stomped elephant to : ______ Senior Design Engineer and Toilet Cleaning Consultant Sensors indicate an approaching FLAME front, sir!!! Sent off of a Brain Damaged Computer Session complete. Neural links terminated. Have a nice day. Set free the bears! And the pandas! Settle this first who moved the stone? Sevareid`s Law: The chief cause of problems is solutions. Severe Error 102: Insufficient Coffee, Operator Halted. SevlesruO otnI rorriM a erA steP dlohesuoH Sex in space, what a concept! Sex is cleaner with a packaged Weiner. Sex is dirty only if done right! Sex is like wine, it gets better with age! Sex is natural, but not if its done right! Sex is not the answer. Sex is the Question. YES is the answer!! Sex is only dirty if it's done right Sex on TV can't hurt you, unless you fall off! Sex, sex, ducks! Don't ask... Sex,unix & rock-n-roll Sex: In one end & out the same. Unless it's SF! Sex: The most fun you can have without laughing. Sexual mistakes are purely erogenous. Sexy women are nature's way of saying-Keep it up! Shake well before using. Shake yo' medicine rattle... Share And Enjoy - or Go Stick Your Head In A Pig Shareware author dies: .GIF at eleven! Shareware it only works if you pay. Shareware it only works if you pay. Shareware tagline: Send $1.00 to ..ME..- Sharks don't eat lawyers out of professional courtesy. Sharp swords are one thing; sharp words are quite another She broke your ribs giving you a backrub? She can't take much more, she's gonna BLOW! - Scotty She canna take much moor Captin... She offered her honor, He honored her offer!! She said "Have a nice day", but I had other plans..... She says hello, you fool, I love k t. She turned me into a newt! She twists and she whirls as she dances it all away... She won't last forever; why give her a diamond? She's a witch! Burn her! She's been on more laps than a napkin. She's got her lugnuts rattling in her hubcaps. She's so fat that when she sings, it's over. She's the original good time that was had by all! Sheep don't fly as much as Plummet. Sheila's Law: You can't fall off the floor. Shell to DOS, come in DOS, Donk thCopy? Shell to DOS....come in DOS. Shell to DOS...Shell to Dos...Come in Dos...Oh no... Shh! Be vewy qwiewet! I'm hunting wuntime ewwors. Shin: Device for finding furniture in the dark. Shirley MacLaine talks to me in my dreams. Shoecide [Shu-eh-syd] n, One abandoned shoe in the road. Shoplifters with the runs take Clepto Bismol. Short quotes are like fences -- Both make good neighbors. Shortcut: Taking a quicker route to stand in a bank line Should we tell the children when we move? Show me a sane man. I'll cure him for you. Show me an original, funny tagline; I'll show you mine. Show me your tagline! Oh, really? Shredded Disaster is Murphy Slaw. Shrouds have no pockets. Shubunkin+Moor+Pearlscale+Ryukin=Heaven Shut up 'n' play yer guitar. Sick minds, Mr. President Sight is an excretion of darkness. Sign Here x_______________________________________ Sign in an office: 'Frogs are smart--they eat what bugs them.' Sign on a hotdog stand: 'What foods these morsels be.' Silence = Death. Silence cannot be misquoted. Silence cannot be misquoted. Silence is evidence of a superb command of the language. Silence, FOUL TEMPTRESS!!! Silent gratitude isn't much use to anyone. Silly Magician, Tricks are for Hookers Silly Rabbit, tricks are for hookers! Silly Wabbit, QWKs are for kids! SilmarillionWorst book by a dead man. SilmarillionWorst book not by J.R.R. Tolkien Since I've used up all of my sick days, I'm calling in DEAD! Since when is the Internal Revenue a Service? Sins repeated seem permitted. Sir! Romulan Warbird decloakingX01:4,VbKx NO CARRIER Sit down, you're rocking the boat! Situation normal. Panic accordingly. Skeet shooters do it 25 times in 8 positions. Skiing Halted, Operator Broken, Out of Service for Repair Skydiving & Maxwell House - Good to the last drop! Skydiving is good till the last drop. Slavery's not just a job, it's indenture. Sleep faster: we need the pillows. Sleep faster: we need the pillows. Sleep with a Photographer and see what develops..... Sleeping is 1/60 part death. Slogans of two generations: 1972: Question Authority! 1992: Why Ask Why? Sloppy and proud of it. Slow programmers Prog-crastinate.... Small changes pick up the reins from nowhere. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue... Smile , someone is watching ! Smile Youre on Candid Compucamera ! Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking. Smile, its the second best thing you can do with your lip Smiley faces were meant to be annoying. Smoke my skin cigar! Smokers kill. Smoking cures weight problems... eventually... Smoking kills live men and cures dead swine. Snap snap, grin grin, wink wink, nudge nudge, say no more Snap, crackle, push, pop... So CUTE when you're righteous! So I said to myself, "Self," I said... So I'm quibbling. So sue me. So Much Stuff... So Little Memory! So YOU are the one stealing all my taglines!!! So far, so good, so what? So good it's better than itself. So how *do* they get Teflon to stick to the pan? So how DO they get the lead into the pencil? So it goes so it goes so it goes so it goes s So little to say and so much time to say it! So little to say and so much time to say it! So many A-holes, so few bullets -- Ford Fairlane So many Jerks, so few bullets So many bytes, so few cps. So many messages, so little time. So many pedestrians...SO little time.... So many systems... So little time! So much fun, there should be a law against it. So much less reputable, so much more fraught So simple a child could do it... go find me a child. So tell me, did a moose ever bite yer sister? So what's the matter with MY taglines? So what's the matter with MY taglines? So young, so bad, so what! -- Wendy O. Williams So! Just what part of NO don't you understand? So, what's this 'RESET' button do? So, you say I'm in a bad mood today! So, you wanted an essay, you got an essay! So... This is the BIG Time? Great... So1 i cab qtyp 3)) wordz epr mibnut roo! Socks are the larval stage of coat-hangers. Socrates, himself, was permanently pissed. Software Independent: Won't work with ANY software. Software Independent: Won't work with ANY software. Software Troubleshooter - Roger w/44 Magnum Soldier of Fortran Some days the only good things on TV are the vase and the clock. Some get the elevator, some get the shaft! Some kids get paid to be good. Mine are good for nothing. Some men are discovered. Others are found out. Some minds should be cultivated, others plowed under Some mouths resemble Energizers, they keep going Some of us take longer to grow up than others. Some people are alive because it's illegal to kill them. Some people come home to unwind; others come home to unravel. Some people drive as if turn signals were an option. Some people tell political jokes... we HAVE them! Some say the solution to polluton is dilution. Some tags I think... Some tags I don't... Some things are clever only the first time. Some things are clever only the first time. Some things have to be believed to be seen. Some wishes _do_ come true... unfortunately. Somebody has to go polish the stars... Someday you will come to your senses. Someday you'll look back on this and laugh. Someday your prints will come.--Kodak Someday, POW! Straight to the moon! Someday, all BBSes will be like this. Somehow / It all seemed / So worthwhile... Someone actually has to think up these things! Someone get me the 'pooper scooper' Something Amiss? Hi, I'm Something Amister. Something is rotten in the state of confusion. Something should be done about this. Something wicked this way comes . . . Something would have to be done... something irresponsible... Sometimes I feel like I've been tied to the ... Sometimes I get the elevator, sometimes the shaft. Sometimes I sits and thinks and sometimes I just sits. Sometimes I wake up grouchy, sometimes I let her sleep. Sometimes it just doesn't pay to think. Sometimes it might seem wise not to grow up. Sometimes the obvious works best! Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough. Sometimes you're a bug..sometimes you're a windshield. Son of a batch. Soon to be a major motion picture. Soon to have a ticket to talk!! Soon to have my feet in the sand, and gators at my heels! Sorry about that, Chief -- Maxwell Smart "86" Sorry about that, fans. Sorry, I Forgot All About the Amnesia Conference! Sorry, I'm a born lever-puller. Sorry, all taglines are busy at this time... Sorry, no tagline. Check back next week Sorry, no tagline. Check back next week. Sorry...no quote today. Sound has nothing to do with music. Sound's like you want Vanna White with Whoopi Goldberg's brain! Sources. Hope you enjoy them as much as I do! Space NOW ! Oh well, maybe later ... Spaceballs: The Tagline Spackle that drive... Spaghetti code = job security. Spare yourself many hard falls; don't jump to conclusions Speak the word, the word is all of us. Specially in December, gift wrap your member. Speculation is the return lane of the road to knowledge. Speed Kills - Use Windows! Speed Scares you? But Micro$oft Windows! Speed kills...and causes other misteaks... Speed kills; slow just infuriates... Spelling problems? Use error-correcting modems! Spending a year dead for tax purposes. Spider Murphy played the tenor saxophone.  Spill a drink on your hard drive? Try PC Towels. Spilling your drink is alcohol abuse! Spindle & Mutilate - See if I care.. Spiritual Truth thru Superior Weapons Spock, quick, I smell tribbles! Spock? Why aren't you dead? Sponge cake: Dessert made of borrowed ingredients. Sponsors of the Olympic Drowning Team. Spots on the Walls by Who Flung Pue Squeak I tell you, Squeak! Squirrels swim on their backs to keep their nuts dry! Stack overflow hurts! Stagecoach -- Drama teacher Stamp it and ship it. Stamp out nouvelle cuisine in our lifetime! Stamp out the post office! Mail electronically. Stand back, I don't know how BIG this thing gets.. Standard Disclamer of course... Standards? On InterLink? MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Standards? Sure, we've got hundreds of 'em! Standards? What standards? Whose standards? Start a download. Get a beer. Multitasking. Start every day off with a smile and get it over with. Start the day with a smile and get it over with. State Dept of Unnecessary Double Redundancies Dept State Of The Art is technospeak for unproven. State your business and leave! Staten Island isn't really a big landfill... Station experiencing difficulty do not adjust your set. Statistics are no substitute for judgment. Status Quo: Latin for the mess we are in. Steal this tagline and I'll tie-dye your cat! Stealth Condom: She won't even feel it coming! Stealth Fighter?, I'll believe it whewI see it! Stealth means never having to say you're sorry. Step off, I'm do'in the Hump! Step on it before it gets the children! Still, a man hears what he wants to hear..... Stock up and save. Limit: one. Stocks, bonds, handcuffs, and leg irons all the same! Stolen from the 7th. Street Bar and Grill. Stop Continental Drift! Stop Talking while I'm interrupting. Stop me before I post again! Stop picking your nose and go to the next message Stop reading me. I don't really exist! Stop searching forever. Happiness is just next to you. Stop the world, I want to get off! Stop what you're doing and TAKE A SHOWER!!! Stops wetness, keeps you dryer. Strange but not a stranger... Stranger then Fiction. Strap on the ol' bit bucket. Striking unions, note: Bankruptcy is also a closed shop! Strip mining prevents forest fires. Students of iron plumbing fixtures: Ferrous Faucet Majors Study of the Glutius Maximus - By Ben Dover Study of the Glutius Maximus - Illustrated By C. Howitt Feals Stupid Jill forgot her Pill. And now they've got a DAUGHTER! Stupid People shouldn't breathe Stupidity got us into this mess, why can't it get us out? Stupidity is NOT a handicap! PARK ELSEWHERE! Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere! Sub-space message sent on StarDate @D@ at @T@. Subliminal Tag Line -- stcudorp dnalroB yuB Subscription up. Please place tagline order now! Subway talk: 'ho-de-dow' = Hold the Door! Success isn't how far you got. Such a deal, normally a dime a piece, for you 2 for a quarter. Sudden prayers make God jump. Suicidal blonde - one who dyed by her own hand!.* Suicidal twin kills sister by mistake! Suitable for Farm Animals & Household Appliances. Sun faced Buddhas, Moon faced Buddhas. Super Turbo Edlin Deluxe for Win 3.1 w/OCR -- Here NOW! Super-dooper party pooper trooper! Support Free Trade ... Smuggle! Support Mental Health. Or I'll kill you. Support Shareware, or pay commercial prices! Support a Japanimation conference! Support the Arts: Shoot a Rapper. Support the Bottom. Support the National Endowment for Creative Misogyny Support the right to arm bears Support your local Police Depart.!! Bribe a cop. Support your local Sysop Support your local hooker. Support your right to keep and arm bears! Sure I know how to copy disks. Where's the Xerox machine? Sure its a BBS, but do you care? Sure, it's embarrassing, but it's over quickly. Sure, when OINK FLAP OINK FLAP .. I'll be damned! Surge into electronic mail. Surrender now - before I have to offer you better terms. Surrender the pink! Surveyors Measure Up Survival Tip #2: Never MOON a werewolf. Survival tip: Never MOON a werewolf. Sushi: Known to the rest of the world as 'Bait'. Swallow your pride, it is non-fattening. Swap read error, you lose your core image. Sweet Chariot portfolio: I buy stocks; they swing low! Sybil was a multi user. Symptomatic, but not contagious. Syntax: Why not? In Canada, we tax everything... Syntax? Why not? They tax everything else. SysOps never sleep! SysOps will take you to disk. Sysop not found! Please notify computer Sysop not found! Please notify computer. Sysoping makes you fat. Sysoping: Not just an adventure, it's a job... System Crash (A)bort (R)etry (T)hrowup System halted -- Press any key to do nothing Systems should be described as simply as possible, but no simpler.--Einstein T'dit, t'dit, t'dit, t'dats all folks! TACT : a mutual agreement to be full of s**t! TAG! YOU'RE IT! TAGLINE NOT FOUND - SYSTEM HALTED. TAGLINES: FACT OR FICTION? On the next GERALDO ! TAGLINES?! We don't need no steenkin' tagline TANSTAAFL TARDIS Express - When it absolutely must be there BEFORE you send it! THE ONLY GOOD HOCKEY PLAYERS ARE THE ONES WITH NO TEETH!! THE ROAD TO SUCCESS IS ALWAYS UNDER CONSTRUCTION. THERE you are Eric. NO, WES, NO! ZZZAAAPP THERE! I've run rings around you logically. THINGS WORK BETTER IF YOU PLUG THEM IN. THIS TAGLINE NOT TO BE READ OUT LOUD. TICKET AGENCY: Another name for SCALPER SCUM! TIME TO PLAY! TJ's Druid Circle cookies are to die(t) for... TONIC.H20 found. BOTTLE.GIN found. SysOp found...LOADED! TRAPEZOID - A device for catching zoids. TThheerree''ss aann EEcchhoo iinn hheerree. TUPHLEM GRDLPHUMP.. to quote Opuss first words.... TV Radio without the imagination. TX Driving: To change lanes, first pull out your .357.. Tablet............ A small table. TacTics= candy for dyslexics. Taco Bell is not a Mexican phone company. Taco Bell: The Mexican phone company. Tag Lines are irrelevent. Tag Theives Inc. Now accepting applications! Tag it!! Tag line continued from previous message Tag line thievery ... On the next Geraldo! Tag line thievery..Comin' up next on Geraldo. Tag, tag, tag ... all you ever do is tag! Tag-line ! You're `it' !!! TagLine Serial No.23459 - (C) 1992, All rights reserved TagLines are for the perpetually Bored. Tagless messages just look naked somehow... Tagline Error at 000H:13H4 Tagline For Sale CHEAP. Insert $1.00 into drive A:. Tagline Has Been Cleared To Prevent Burn-In. Tagline Lotto: <- Scratch here for prize Tagline Lotto: <- Scratch here for prize Tagline Out To Lunch. Back in an hour. Tagline Out To Lunch. Back in an hour. Tagline Subsystem down at this time. Tagline access denied! Tagline cancelled due to lack of interest! Tagline dropped due to budget cuts. Tagline generator halted - please stand by..... Tagline not Found -- Please Notify Sysop! Tagline not found -- Please notify Sysop! Tagline stealing is the sincerest form of flattery. Tagline uncloaking dead ahead Sir... Tagline* If you read it ... You're it!! Tagline: Universal Wisdom in 45 bytes. Tagline? I don't need no stinking Tagline!!! Tagline? What tagline?..... Taglines R Us (January Clearance Now In Progress!) Taglines are for those people who tagalong long time. Taglines are irrelevant. Taglines are the bumper stickers of the '90s. Taglines deleted ...... Taglines make great Christmas gifts. Taglines of the next generation series #923882. Taglines should be GAGlines. Taglines--A place to dry wet tags. Taglines.... Steal 'em. We'll make more! Taglines: Things that make you go 'Hmmm.....' Taglines: and How They Affect Women. Next On Oprah. Taglines: your chance to piss someone off. Tain't nobody's business (not even mine). Take 20 aspirins, and you'll feel better if you wake up. Take This 'Conference' and Shove It. Take an astronaut to launch. Take it as it comes. Take it for what it's Worthless Take it from me - he's got the goods. Take it slow, but take it. And don't forget to KEEP IT FUN. Take my advice, I don't use it anyway. Take my advice...I'm not using it Take the law into your own hands? Take the steps, the elevator don't work. Take the time to snuff the dandelions Take this s**t to the DeadHorse Conference!!! Takes a little effort to make PCBoard do un-natural acts. Taking a QUANTUM LEAP into the past. Taking a turn for the worst. Talk is cheap . . . until you hire a lawyer. Talk is cheap, because supply exceeds demand... Talk to a Plant...It's rewarding... Talk to your Plant often; it doesn't cost a Penny! Talking is a disease of age. Tandy America's Technology. Sure! Taoism: Shit Happens. Taste my steel, pasty boy! Taste...a creamy, fish-like taste. Tastes great! Taxation is little more than legalized extortion. Teachers would do it....but with class!! Teamworkorkorkorkorkork is essential, it gives them someone else to shoot at. Tech Support is Just A Busy Signal Away Tech Support: Not just a job, an adventure! Tech writers do it manually. Technician in search of a network.... Teen-age Mutant Ninja Haggis!! Teenage Mutant Ninja Barbers. Teenagers: Your punishment for enjoying sex Telecommunications is a bit far fetched. Telemate built-in multi-tasking is great! Telepathy is minding someone else's business. Television gives good disaster. Tell a child he got 1 right, not 99 wrong. Tell a child he got 1 right, not 99 wrong. Tell me again how I'm lucky to work here..I keep forgetting Tell me how,. Dave. Tell me now, before I spend 20 dollars on drinks. Tell the boss I am busy Multi-Tasking. Tempest: (T)ransient (EMP) (EST)imates. Tempest: (TEM)-Wave (P)ropagation in (E)-Field (S)ite (T)esting. Tempest: (TEM)porary (PE)rsonnel (S)ecurity (T)est. Tempest: That which occurs in Teapots. Temporarily out of tag lines..... Temporary sysop access granted! Terminator 3: Klingon female with PMS. Terminator 4: The Sex Machine, And He's Comming! Terminator bumper sticker: I TIME TRAVEL NAKED. Termites've Have Eaten Thru To Your Top Layer Terror: A female Klingon with PMS. Tesseract now! Test. Test. T E S T !!! Is this thing on???? Teutonic [n] -- Not enough gin. Th' MIND is the Pizza Palace of th' SOUL Th...th...that's all folks ! Thank Congress for the 1st 10 and the 14th ! Thank god for the `EFF'.. Last bastion of the resistant Thank you for encouraging my behavior. Thank you for making the last moments of my life socially awkward. Thank you. Alexander will not repeat this mistake.- Worf. Thanks for not smoking, she breathed. Thar's Mobius Dick, the convoluted whale. That Rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! That ball was close. Close hell, look at this knot!! That does not compute. That great dust heap called 'history'" -- Birrel That is what I'd call a dead parrot! That is, IF you can think of 50 tag lines.... That old Velveeta really sticks like glue! That rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile long! That tagline is TRUE -> <- That tagline is FALSE That tagline is true ---> <--- That tagline is false That was ZEN -- this is TAO That was a favor I did you? That was definitely the LAST bug! That was so funny, I laughed 'till I stopped. That was then and this is NOW! That's 'G-R-A-T-E Expectations,' also by Edmund Wells. That's Australian for BBS, mate. That's Not a Bug, That's a FEATURE! That's Why God Invented Grenade Launchers! That's a great answer, now what was my question again? That's about as serious as I get! That's all Folks That's disgusting, but funny. That's my story and I'm stickin' to it! That's not a bug, it's an enhanced feature! That's not a bug, that's a feature That's racing... That's right, send a self-abused stomped elephant to: That's what she said. That's why GOD made your eyes; to plagiarize. The 'danes can inherit the Earth--I'm going to the stars! The 10 million byte flamethrower. The 1st person to raise their fist, just ran out of ideas The 1st rule to smart tinkering is to save all the parts. The 23:00 News and Mail Service The 3 kinds of lies - lies, damned lies & statistics - MT The 4 food groups: Fast,Frozen,Instant & Microwave The BBS in English. The BBS of the Stars!" The BBS on a mission from God. The BBS that 'Rocks Philadelphia'. The BBS that asks the question, but doesn't care about the answer. The BBS that boldly goes. We haven't figured out where yet. The BBS that cares enough to send the very best. The BBS that dares to ask the question: 'Huh?' The BBS that gives your modem an April fresh smell. The BBS that glows in the dark. The BBS that looks GREAT in silk stockings. The BBS that melts in your mouth, not in your hand. The BBS that never repeats repeats itself itself... The BBS that never sleeps. The BBS that promises an orgasm on each call... SO, we lied. The BBS that they invented autodial for. The BBS to have when you're having only one. The BBS with Take-out. The BBS with a hint of musk. The BBS with the best g-spots...er...g-files around. The BBS you wrote home about... The BBS your mother warned you about. The Big Bloodsucker Bites The Big One... The Bigger the Drive,the more Junk Collected. The Borg -- plastic surgery taken too far. The Borg are coming! Quick, try and look useless The Borg have neither honor or courage. The Bowery Boys Meet Bigfoot. The Bride of Bigfoot. The Buck stops here, the Dough just visits.. The CLOCK$ stops here. The Church of St Todd the Incontinent The Devil made me read Zmodem docs....... The Dream State The END (and more than you wanted to know) The Earth is our Mother & our 9 months are up The First Liar Never Has A Chance The Four Food Groups: Caffine, Chocolate, Sugar and Sex. The Gang And The Government Are No Different The Greatest Right is the Right 'To Fail' The Grim File Reaper The Harder you work . . . the luckier you get The Hearbeat of America, that's todays IBM! The Hostess will seat you now. The Industrial Strength BBS. The Japanese have created a word to mean vomit: Bushusuru. The Kennedy Constant: Don't get mad get even. The Lab called,..... Your brain is ready! The Legacy of Bigfoot The Light at the End of the Tunnel Could be a flame thrower. The Majority is never right; unless it includes me The Mob And The Government Are No Different The Name "Mustang" on an LX is a sign of Fords stupidity! The Names Project..... The OFFICIAL tagline of the 1996 Olympics! The ONLY thing constant is change... Hmmm The PARITY CHECK is in the E-MAIL! The PS/2 Mod 50 was designed on a Monday. The PS/2 Model 30-286 was designed on a Monday. The Politician's Diet: Crow, Limburger and hogwash The REAL masterminds of Iraq;Souter&Neal Bush The Road goes ever on and on... The Russian Express Card: Don't Leave Home! The Sheik Battles Bigfoot The Sleeper Has Awakened. The Solution to a Problem Changes the Problem The SysOp probably disagrees with this user! The Terminator Said It Best. The U.S. needs our water...... Flush Twice! The UART's will'na take this speed cap'n The Uncle Fester & Keith Moon School of Party. The Universe is a figment of it's own imagination. The Universe is queer. The Vogon ship hung motionless in the sky... The agony of delete.... The animals can't tell you, you just gotta know. The answer is ashdkjhasdhgsaghjadgasdsad The art of holding 8 oz of liquid in your mouth without swallowing? The beatings will continue utill moral improves. The best cure for the nations economy would be economy. The best memos are the least memos. The best prophet of the future is the past. The best substitute for experience is being a teenager. The best way to accelerate Windows is at escape velocity. The best way to accelerate a Mac is at 32 ft/sec The best way to accelerate a Mac is at 9.8 m/s The best way to accelerate a Mac is at ESCAPE VELOCITY. The best way to save face is to keep the lower part shut. The best writing never appears. The best writing never appears. The better you look, the more you'll see. The biggest mistake that you can make... The blue light was my mind.... Robert Johnson The buck doesn't even slow down here! The buck stops at the desk over there. The castle of aaaaaaaargh The cat is eating my mouse! No,No Kitty... The choice of a new generation. The computer is incredibly fast, accurate, and stupid.... The computer made me do it; HONEST! The cost of feathers has risen... Now even DOWN is up! The cost of living hasn't affected its popularity. The cruelest lies are told in silence. The cure for writer's cramp is writer's block. The customer takes out a gun and shoots the owner. The cycle will repeat itself. The cycle will repeat itself. The desire of knowledge increases ever... The discontented man finds no easy chair. The dog ate my .REP packet. The dog ate my .REP packet. The dylithium crystals cannae handle it,Cap'n! The earth is like a tiny grain of sand, only much bigger. The easy way is always mined. The emptier the head,the harder it is to fill The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack. The eyes of wolves are flowers fertilized in evil brains. The fact that it works is immaterial. The falsely dramatic obscures the truly dull. The faster you go, the shorter you are-- Einstein The fear of sponge-cats is the beginning of wisdom. The first rule of intelligent tinkering is save all parts The first stereophonic BBS. The floggings WILL continue until morale improves! The flush toilet is the basis of Western civilization. The fully interchangeable BBS. The fun part is to get her to purrrr! The further away from home you are the harder your pecker gets. The future lies ahead. The past lies, lies, lies, The future will be like the past, only more expensive The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades. The good of the people is the chief law. The greatest ability is dependability. The greatest ability is dependability. The guy sure looks like plant food to me! The hard disk you save may be your own The hell with the prime directive; let's kill something! The hell with your mountains ! Drink Bud.(G) The hidden flaw never remains hidden. The human race is still in eta test. The hurrieder I go, the behinder I get! The ill-tempered cannot teach. Hillel The incumbents are crooks, vote them out The lame dog may miss the hunt, but not the meal. The law neither does nor requires idle acts. The letters H, A, L are alphabetically adjacent to the letters I, B, M. The love of a husky is a precious thing. The mad quoter! The majority is never right The majority is never right. The male sheep was badly cut, Tom rambled. The man who dies with the most toys is dead. The map is not the territory! The maxi-strength bbs. The meek shall inherit the Earth...We shall inherit the Stars The mind is the place great adventures start. The minumum daily requirement for hugs is 4. The mistake you make is trying to figure it out. The monkey speaks his mind. The moon is blue and I'm not to happy either. The more I learn, the less I know. The more RAM you have, the better, M. Chambers The more we do; the more we can do... The more we do; the more we can do... The more you know, the easier some vet's job is. The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets. The more you run over a cat, the flatter it gets. The more you say, the less people remember. The more you say, the less people remember. The most abundant items 1) Hydrogen 2) Stupidity. The most abundant items: 1) Hydrogen 2) Stupidity. The most fun you can have with your clothes on. The most toys {on credit} at the end wins The music is your only friend until the end. -Morrison The music's kinda nice. My compliments to the clef! The next sentence is true. The last sentence was false. The nicer I am the more they think I'm lying. The number you have reached is not in service ! The object is to win the game. The official BBS of Nothing. The older I get the better I used to be. The older I get the better I used to be. The older you get the greater you were! The only BBS with its number scrawled on bathroom walls. The only good hockey players are the ones with no teeth! The only rose without thorns is friendship. The only rose without thorns is friendship. The open hand of desire wants everything. The opiate of the masses. The opinions here are strictly my own (or those of my machine) The other line always moves faster. The other line moves faster. The pancake house was robbed. How waffle. The past is just Prolog. The path to hell is paved with governm't subsidies The person you rejected yesterday could make you happy, if you say yes. The pets eat better than I do! The place where YOU can make a difference. Sort of. Maybe. Nahh... The plural of louse is........lice. The plural of mouse is........mice. The plural of spouse is.......spice. The population is growing. The population is growing. The porcelain god's name, is 'Ralph.' The problem with depending on government is that you cannot depend on it. The problem with the gene pool is there's no lifeguard. The proceeding opinions are not those of the author. The proof is in the posting. The prototype of all guns was a bow and bullet. The prudish amputee: Goody One Shoe. The purpose of life is life with a purpose... The real world is a special case. The real world is a special case. The reality check is in the mail. The repairman will never have seen a model quite like yours before. The result of years of progra@I_. '?SYNTAX ERROR The right selection, protect your erection. The right to be left alone is the root of all freedom The rivers are full of crocodile nasties The road to success is under construction ... The rooster may crow, but the hen delivers. The rooster may crow, but the hen delivers. The root of all evil makes a pretty good tea. The sad thing about Windows bashing is it's all true. The scooters are not for the devout. The secret is to BANG the rocks together, guys... The secretary will disavow any knowledge ... The secretary will disavow any knowledge ... The seminar on Time Travel will be held two weeks ago. The seven words you can never, ever say are f The seven words you can never, ever say are f The shortest distance between new friends is a smile. The shortest distance between two Points is a BossNode. The shortest distance between two puns ... is a straight line. The smarter you are, the easier some vet's job is. The solution to the problem changes the problem. The sparrows are flying again -- Steven King. The stream-of-unconsciousness BBS. The subliminal message for today is. The sun comes up too early for my liking! The sun comes up too early for my liking! The telephone will ring when you are outside The telephone will ring when you are outside The thoughtless are rarely wordless. The time for action is past! The time for action is past! Now is the time for senseless bickering! The time is right to make new friends. The toughest BBS you'll ever love. The trouble with 'normal' is that it always gets worse. The trouble with cats is they've got no tact. The trouble with reality-no background music! The truth will be found when it is no longer needed. The truth, however, is not pertinent to the issue. The truth, however, is not pertinent to the issue. The tuna doesn't taste the same without dolphin. The ultimate in useless diversions. The universe is laughing behind your back. The universe is very BIG. Believe me. The universe looks smooth-if you stand back far enough. The weather is here - Wish you were beautiful. The well resolved mind is single & one pointed The well resolved mind is single & onepointed. The wise learn from fools, not vice-versa. The word today is, LEGS. Help spread the word The word today is, LEGS. Help spread the word! The words we use can compound our problems The world does not revolve on an axis. The world is a cynic's playground. The world is a cynic's playground. The world is coming to an end. Please log off The world is only as far as an InterLink board! The world's full of Cactus, but I don't have to sit on it The worst thing about censorship is . TheBorgAreBackAn'TheresGonnaBeTroubleHeyNaHey There IS intelligent life in the universe... It ignores us... There ain't no such thing as a free lunch. There ain't no such thing as a free lunch. There are drugs named after us. There are lies, damn lies, and environmentalists. There are no stupid questions, except for the ones you ask. There are some who call me . . . Tim . . . There are truths which can kill a nation. There are truths which can kill a nation. There are two solutions - hardware or software. There is a fungus among us!!! There is always a way. There is always one more bug. There is no Power like Firepower. There is no X in ESPRESSO. There is no dark side of the moon, really. There is no dark side of the moon, really. There is no gravity, the Earth sucks. There is no gravity. The earth sucks. There is no sin except stupidity. There is no stopping in the read zone. There is nothing else but That... There is nothing else but That... There is water on Mars, we've seen canals --Dan Quayle There isn't a whole lot one can say in 50 characte There it is! The Bridge of Death! There must be 50 ways to love your liver ... There once was a women from Venus, whose body was shaped.... There seems to be an ECHO in here! There was a tagline here but someone stole it. There was much to explore, but an adult might not think so. There were bells, but I never heard them. There were computers in Biblical times. Adam a Wang. There were computers in Biblical times. Eve had an Apple. There's ALWAYS one more bug... There's Loonies running freely through the halls. There's a dead bishop on the landing, dad! There's a final in from Rome: Lions 45 Christians 0 There's a sucker born again every minute There's a sucker born every minute. There's a whole Lalo Schifrin goin' on. There's always 1 more SOB than you counted on There's always 1 more SOB than you counted on. There's always room for JELLO! There's always room for filth! There's an exception to every rule, except this one. There's got to be more to life than compile-and-go. There's more to life than increasing its speed There's much to say but your eyes interrupt me. There's my way, and then there's the easy way There's my way, and then there's the easy way. There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want. There's no accounting for taste-Col Sanders There's no future in time travel. There's no place like home...There's no place like There's no place like real mode. I love it. There's no place like real mode. I love it. There's no recession. I just LIKE being underemployed! There's no skeletons in my closet! There's no such word as FAIL in my vocabulary! There's nothing a concentrated phaser blast can't solve. There's nothing like a Guinness. There's one born every minute. There's one fool in every married couple. There's some lovely filth over here... Thereisnodarksideofthemoon.Thewholebloodything'sdark! Thermodynamics - a thermometer on the run? These Days There's No Arrest For The Wicked. These are the things dreams are made of... These are the things dreams are made of... These opinions are mine and only mine (unless you wnat to claim them). These were the 'hi-tech' FBI guys, you see! They aren't evil...just stupid. They built a new church and had the organ transplanted. They call me Mr. Tinker Train! -- Ozzy Osborne They called me mello' yello'........... They just don't make nostalgia like they used to. They never let you live it down - Nero They say I'm crazy but I haven't the time... They say I'm crazy but I haven't the time... They say act your age, and when you do they get mad They surf, those who only stand on waves.... They talk of my drinking but never of my thirst. They tried to sell us egg foo young... They went that'a way! > They're just words. They don't mean anything They're just words. They don't mean anything. They're still using money. We've got to find some. Kirk They're trying to confuse us to death. Thhis takline iz slitely out of cofus. Thicken up runny yogurt by stirring in a lump of lard Things are often what they seem... Things in this room do not react well to bullets. Things that make you go 'Hmmm....' Things work better if you plug them in. Things work better if you plug them in. Things you never hear people say: 'Hand me that Piano!' Things you never hear people say: Please saw my legs off. Think of it as an electronic joy-buzzer for your mind. Think! While it's still legal!! This *used* to be an anti Windows, er, pro-OS/2 tagline :) This BAUD'S for You This BBS has achieved Air superiority. This Is My Tagline. Go Get Your Own! This LAN is your LAN, this LAN is my LAN! This Life is a test...It is only a test.... This Lonely Tagline Seeking A Mate This Lonely Tagline Seeking A Mate. This Scud's for you! This Tag Line no verb. This Tagline causes cancer take it, I dare you! This Tagline was filmed before a live studio audience. This above all; to thine own self be true -- Shakespeare This ain't as good as sex---but it's safer! This discussion is hanging by a thread. This discussion is hanging by a thread. This door is baroquen, please wiggle Handel. This here's a government experiment.... This here's a government experiment.... This hobby is as addictive as heroin, no question about it. This is Marion Barry----on drugs. This is Marion Barry----on drugs. This is NOT Burger King. You do not get it YOUR way. This is X Insurance Co - How May I Shaft You? This is a CONFERENCE - not a podium. This is a chain-tag. I've been stolen <10> times. This is a fried egg on drugs. Any questions? This is a fried egg on drugs. Any questions ? This is abuse, arguments are down the hall. This is an offense-optional message. This is an operating table, and I am the surgeon. This is hopeless. Fighting would be preferable. - Worf This is information NOT advice. This is my tag,there're many like it,this one is mine. This is news. This is your brain on news. Any questions? This is not a tag line. This is not a tagline - It's a political statement This is not a tagline... This is only a demo reply... This is only an exhibition. Please, no wagering. This is the Usenet: do you expect anything other than gross generalizations? This is the stuff from which dreams are made. This is the voice of World Control... This is what started the electronic revolution?? This is your brain ... This is your brain on Windows. This is your brain on drugs, toast and coffee This is your brain on drugs, toast and coffee. This is your brain...THIS is your brain on DOS! This is your brains on eggs... Any questions? This is your sysop. ôs s ou ssop ug. This isn't a tag line. It just looks like one. This isn't a tagline, trust me. This isn't blank, so it can't go anywhere. This makes you feel better??? This makes you feel better??? This message brought to by The Wizzo Chocolate Company. This message has been [Stoned] This message is not supposed to be here! This message is not supposed to be here! This message was written in the Key of H-Flat. This message will self-destruct... This message worth 2 cents and darn well worth it! This modem will now self destruct...5..4..3..2..1..0.. This must be the Placezzzz... This never happens on other systems I call. This note edited for the ironically impaired. This phone is baroque; please call Bach later. This probably doesn't help, but... This program doesn't work with DOS 1.0 or higher. This quote is worth $16 in a twisted, dememted way. This rerun due to tagline writers' strike. This sentence is functioning as a tagline. This software will eliminate all mitsakes! This space for rent, just ask you sysop for info... This space for rent. Send $50 to ROF..... This space for rent. Send $50 to ROF..... This space never intentionally blank!!! This space reserved for future tagline theft. This tag is new, witty, and stolen <7> times. This tag line is "Bulletin Broad-proof"! This tagline came last in the `Original Tagline Comp.' This tagline can be bought. This tagline censored by the moderator. This tagline closed due to conditions beyond our co *#} This tagline compliments of the BatComputer *** This tagline contains 100% nnw bs. This tagline contains a virus: go ahead and copy me! This tagline has been recycled! This tagline has no additives or preservatives! This tagline intentionally left blank. This tagline intentionally left blank. This tagline intentionally left partially blank This tagline is SHAREWARE! To register, send me $10 This tagline is a figment of your imagination This tagline is a hologram, insuring message authenticity This tagline is currently out of order. This tagline is currently out of order. This tagline is dedicated to my bird friend.. This tagline is especially for kleptomaniacs! This tagline is listed for no good reason!! This tagline is new, witty, and stolen. This tagline is umop apisdn This tagline is umop apisdn This tagline is umop apisdn This tagline lacks content. Give it 2 stars. This tagline only uses recycled keystrokes This tagline stinks. (Scratch N Sniff) This tagline stinks. (Scratch N Sniff) This tagline stolen by me, or was it you??? This tagline vibrates if you rub it the right way. This tagline was blank before you looked at it. This tagline was blank before you looked at it. This tagline was made on the . This tagline's confused-thinks it's a message. This universe is BORING without the Romulans! This won't hurt, I promise. Thongs [n], What Thinatra things. Those that have the firepower make the rules. Those who can, do. Those who can't, write the manual. Those who can, do; those who can't, Simulate. Those who do good will get their Just Punishment! Those who learn not from history are doomed to repeat it. Those who live closest arrive latest. Those who live closest arrive latest. Those who won't think will have it done for them. Those who won'tn't think will have it done for them. Thou art God(dess). Though I never left, I'm back. :-) Three Jews go into a bar and buy it! Three can keep a secret, if two are dead. Throw rocks at sea-birds; leave no tern un-stoned. Thunderclap - an extremely violent form of VD. Tie m'kangaroo down sport, tie m'kangaroo down! Tiger In The Outhouse - By Claud Balls Time Flies Like the Wind, House Flies Like .... Time Stands Still! Film at 11:00, or whenever. Time exists so that everything doesn't happen at once. Time flies like wind. Fruit flies like pears. Time flies when you don't know what you're doing. Time flies when you're having bugs. Time flies when you're having bugs. Time for culture, gone CHOPIN, BACH in a MINUET. Time for culture, gone Chopin, Bach in a minuet Time is a stream we fish in Time spent at Cons does not count against your lifespan Time travel instructions: "Fold along the dotted plane" Time, time, time: see what's become of me. Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. Tis as rare as a Republican in a Social Service agency. Tis but a scratch! To Be is To Do - Socrates To Be... Or What ? To Serve Man- at better booksellers. To a cat, 'NO!' means 'Not while I'm looking'. To achieve the impossible, attempt the absurd To be is to do - Sartre To be is to do. To be or not to be - Shakespeare To be or not to be, that always confused me! To boldly code what no one has coded before! To boldly glow, where no man has glowed To boldly go where no man has gone before. To curry favor, favor curry. To do is to be - Nietzsche To do is to be. To endure, be obscure. To err is Human. To blame someone else is politics. To err is human, to forgive is against FidoNet policy! To err is human, to forgive is against company policy. To err is human, to forgive is out of the question. To err is human, to forgive....$5.00 To err is human, to forgive....$5.00 To err is human. To forgive is unusual. To err is human....To blame others even more so. To every exception there is a rule. To forgive is divine. But getting even is Heaven!! To hell with justice...I want blood... To hell with the Prime Directive! FIRE!!!!!! To iterate is human; to recurse, divine. To know yourself is the ultimate form of aggression. To laugh at men of sense is the privilege of fools To love another person is to see the face of God. To much thinking only leads to delay! To refuse praise is to seek praise twice. To refuse to decide is a decision. To sleep, perchance to Dream To whom the gods destroy, they first teach Windows... Today is canceled due to lack of interest! Today is the last day of your life, so far. Today is tomorrow's yesterday. Toddler: An indoor tornado Tokers local 101, We smoke till we croak! Tolerance is the apex of any civilization. Tomahawk. When you care enough to send best! Tomorrow will be canceled due to lack of interest. Tomorrow will be yesterday soon enough. Tongue covered eyetooth - couldn't see what I was saying. Tonight yer taking no hostages, and I'm taking no prisoners. Too Much of a Good Thing Can Be Wonderful. Too bad that stupidity isn't painful... Too bad that stupidity isn't painful... Too busy to laugh? Then you are too busy. Too chicken to get in harm's way. Too hip for taglines Too much FREE space? Keep *.BAK files! Too much glory can be half disgrace. Too much glory can be half disgrace. Too much month left at the end of the money Too much month left at the end of the money. Too much of a good thing is WONDERFUL. Too tired to think up a new tagline! Torture: The Ultimate Art Form. Total Confusion: The Power Source of the Future !! Totally illogical, there was no chance. Toto, don't think were online anymore%$#^@# NO CARRIER Tough Love is better than co-dependency. Tough? My goldfish can whip your dog! Toxicology- a risky profession Trails got to be here somewhere - D.Boone Transplanted from Wisconsin. Traveling this spring? Visit Pern in between Tree Hugger's Nightmare: Mt. Graham Red Squirrel Stew ... Trespassers will be shot, survivors will be shot again! Tribbles - $5.00 for all you can pile on top of you. Tried to call Phoenix, I misdialed FIJI. Troll Appreciation Society, join today!! Truck Pulls: for people who don't understand WWF. Trust me, I know what I'm tagging. Trust me, would I lie to you..... Truth Through Superior Firepower. Truth is more of a stranger than fiction -- Mark Twain Truth is shorter than fiction... Try Dbase 1.0! It's loaded with "Features"! Try Milk of Amnesia - when you need to forget Try Milk of Amnesia - when you need to forget Try Preparation H-Bomb. For your Nuclear Piles. Try and steal@R@this tagline! Try it.... You might Like it .... Try it.... You might Like it .... Try not to salt thy salt. For it is salted afore. Try our new dehydrated water! Just add ...uh...er... Try to fix the mistake...never the blame. Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. Trying to reason with hurricane season Trying to reason with hurricane season Tuba or not tuba? Tuba or not tuba? Tumor............. An extra pair. Turn off your mind, relax and float downstream. Turn your 486 into a Gameboy! .. type WIN at C:\> Turn your 486 into a Gameboy: Type WIN at C:\> Twice the strength of those other leading national brands. Twisted Sister asks US to keep the noise down. Two Great Tennesseans: Charlie and Jack Daniels Two Lost Clusters Found In the Writer's Brain..... Two can live as cheaply as one what? Two can live as cheaply as one what? Two is company. Three is poor birth control! Two lost cluster's found in the writer's brain! Two most common elements hydrogen, stupidity Two most common elements in the universe: Hydrogen & Stupidity. Two most common elements: hydrogen, stupidity Two writes don't make a novel! Two writes don't make a novel! Two wrongs don't make a right, but three lefts do. Two, ten, eleven. Eyes, fingers, toes. - Gomez Addams Typed on my Ultra Megger Wallet Whammer. Tyrell Corporation: More Human than Human. U are in a maze of twisty tag-lines, all alike... UFOs are real. The Air Force isn't. UNIX, TheyNIX, SheNIX, HeNIX; INIX? OS/2! No, NetWare... UNIX: It's not just a hair color, it's a way of life. Uh oh. Your zip file is open! Uh, oh ... Your Zip file is open. Uhh, 4500 megs, 18 megahertz, yeah, thats it... Ultimate office automation: Networked coffee machines! Ultimate office automation: Networked coffee machines! Umm...your ZIP is open... Unable to find COLDBEER.CAN...SysOp not Loaded! Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted! Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted! Unable to locate REALITY.SYS - Universe halted! Unable to locate humor -- Operator Halted! Unable to open LEVI.ZIP Continue job? Y/N Unable to open LEVI.ZIP. Continue job? (Y/N) Unbreakable toys are useful for breaking other toys. Unclog drains with Liquid Metal Terminator! Under The Grandstand - By Seymore Butt Under Worked, Over Paid... So who's complaining?? Underneath all these clothes I am completely naked! Undocumented Features will rule the EARTH! Unicorns aren't mythical -- virgins are! Unified Field Theory--My field is your field Unified Field Theory--My field is your field. Unix isn't Vax/Vms (Fortunately!) Unix isn't Vax/Vms (Fortunately) Unix weirdo in training. Handle with care. Unknown: soon to be grunged, somewhere. Unknown: soon to be grunged, somewhere. Unless you've got some sort of a PROBLEM with that... Unrecoverable system error at 417A:32CF. Incompetent user Unrecoverable sytem error at 417A:32CF. Incompetent user Unrest of spirit---is a mark of L I F E ! Unwritten laws can not be erased. Unwritten laws can not be erased. Urinalysis: The study of Pissed Off People. Urine............. Opposite of Your out Use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment Use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment! Use DEVICE=EXXON to screw up your environment. Use NABOB-The Preparation H of Archivers! Use NABOB-The Preparation H of Archivers! Use Oxymoron for those really stupid pimples! Use an accordion, go to jail. It's the law. Use only as directed. Use tasteful words, You might have to eat them. Use tasteful words. You might have to eat them. Use the gas, Luke! Use your own tagline, this one's MINE!! Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first! Used Taglines for Sale, gettem while their hot!! Used all your sick days? Call in dead! Used taglines for sale. $10 each. Used taglines for sale. $10 each. Useless, but decorative. Users never appreciate computers, until their down VAX,FAX,WAX, what's the difference. VD is nothing to clap about. VELVEETA: the cheese that cannot die! VVV Beware of limbo-dancers below this line VVV V_o^o_V Things that go Bump on the Keyboard. Valley of the Dulls-Lehigh Valley,PA. Variable Not Found Variable Not Found. Variables won't; constants aren't. Variables won't; constants aren't. Varicose veins.... Veins that are very close together. Vasectomy: A snip in time saves nine. Vegetables stink too, sometimes Vegetables stink too, sometimes. Vegetarians eat vegetables;I'm a humanitarian Vegetarians eat vegetables;I'm a humanitarian. Venetian blinds are made by shady characters. Veni, Vidi, VCR - I came, I saw, I videotaped it Veni, Vidi, Visa - I came, I saw, I charged it Verb, as the documentation (aka the "F....ine Manual :-) Version Rule: Version 1.0 was smaller and faster. Victory finds a hundred fathers, but defeat is an orphan. Vietnam cookbook: 101 ways to WOK your dog. Virginia is for Lovers. Virginity is curable. Virginity is like a balloon: One prick and it's gone. Virginity like balloon, one prick.... all gone. Virtual Reality is a contradiction. Virtue is its own punishment. Virtue is its own punishment. Virtue pays but there's no market for it. Virus Analysis Kit - some assembly required... Viruses are by definition Public Domain Software. Visit Xanth today! Visiting This Planet . . .', said The Baron Latimer Vital Social Issues 'N' Stuff with KELLY Viva la Raza! (But which one?) Vivisection is a crime. Unless you use a mime. Void for vagueness? Void where prohibited. Void where prohibited. Vote for "NONE of the ABOVE" Vuja De - The Feeling You've Never Been Here Vulcan Science Academy Dropout. Vulcans NEVER bluff ---Spock Vultures only fly with carrion luggage Vultures only fly with carrion luggage. W el l, I f ou n d th e s pac e b a r WANTED: Any Bell Atlantic employee, to be shot on site! WARNING! Removal of this tagline prohibited by law! WARNING! REMOVAL OF THIS TAGLINE IS PROHIBITED BY LAW. WARNING! REMOVAL OF THIS TAGLINE PROHIBITED BY LAW WARNING! SAFESEX.LZH is a Trojan WARNING! SAFESEX.ZIP IS A TROJAN. WARNING, illogical plotting detected! WARNING, illogical plotting detected! WARNING... drinking tap water may kill your thirst! WARNING: Shock hazard. No user-servicable components inside. WARNING: Do not attempt this at home. WARNING: The Surgeon General has determined that EVERYTHING causes SOMETHING. WE DON'T CARE - WE DON'T HAVE TO - WE'RE ANSI-PHREAKS! WGA building in L.A. is of all-block construction! WHAT THE HECK HAPPENED HERE!!!! WHILE (length(walk) > length(pier)) DO BEGIN WHO WILLS CAN-WHO TRIES DOSE-WHO LOVES LIVES WINDOWS, from the people that brought you EDLIN! WINDOWS: From the people who brought you EDLIN! WOMAN.ZIP.....Great program, no documentation! WOMAN.ZIP....Great program, no documentation! WON, TOO, THRE, FOR. . . _Duz_ spelling count?? WOOF WOOF ,thats my other dog immitation... WOW! Look at the *size* of that.....briefcase. WWhhaatt ddooeess DDUUPPLLEEXX mmeeaann?? WYPIWYG= What You Printed Is What You've Got. WYTYSYDG-What you thought you saw, you didn't get. Wadda ya expect from a nice Jewish boy? Waddya mean FIRED?! Waddya mean FIRED?! Wait a moment....wait a moment....wait a moment.... Wait for further instructions.... Wait! I'll be right down! Save me a couple of glasses of it! Waiter: Unemployed actor Waiting for Spring Takes a Long Time Walk through doors, don't crawl through Windows. Wanna Buy A Rubber Computer? Wanna REALY enjoy your mail? Be .QWK about it! Wanna do something big? Pick up a boulder. Wanna do something big? Pick up a boulder. Wanna play "Whisper Down The Lane"? Wanna play 'Whisper Down The Lane'? Wanna read a good horror novel? Get a history book! Wanna see my PeeWee Herman impression? Want some candy, little girl? Want to bust a chair across my teeth? Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory. Wanted: Dictionary with Index. Wanted: Hair-cutter. Excellent growth potential. Wanted: Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink. Wanted: Part-time married girls for soda fountain in sandwich shop. Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night. War is just a hostile corporate take over. Warning - The 'esc' key doesn't work in Leavenworth... Warning BBS under construction! Warning! REALITY.SYS corrupted: reboot universe? [Y/n] Warning! This tagline fails CRC check! Warning, Message Truncated! Warning, This message may cause drowsiness. Warning--Area Protected by Highly Trained Attack-Owls. Warning: Contents under pressure. Warning: Do not reuse tagline. Discard safely after use. Warning: Ignore all previous fortune cookie fortunes Warning: Media Virus detected. Warning: The SysOp is watching you! Warning: bonds skin. Warning: not responsible for contents of posts made after midnight ;-} Warning: this could have been a -coded- tagline! Warp 5, Mr. Sulu. No, more clutch! Warped, and proud of it. Wart-hog [n] The result of crossing a pig with a frog. Was it as good for you as it was for you? Was it good for you, too? Was there wit once from whence there was whining? Wash DC--Southern Efficiency, Northern Charm Wash DC--Southern Efficiency, Northern Charm Wasting time is an important part of living. Watch out for low flying butterflies.... Watch out, warm fuzzies headed your way! Watch this space Water, water everywhere...not a drop to drip. We *have* the Holy Hand Grenade, Sir! We Need Your Quotes! Lets see the toteboard, Captain... We aim to please and shoot to kill! We all have our opinions, but mine is correct. We all live in a yellow subroutine. We apologize for the inconvenience... We are always the same age inside. We are going out! But we shall do it as proper vampires! We are on a roll! Cavorting on the Butter! We are the Emergency Broadcast System, gone amuck. We are the Knights who say, "Neep!" We are the people our parents warned us about. We are what we do, not what we say. We asked for a few good men and look at what we got. We blow up REAL good. We build bodies that last a lifetime. We can keep it up FOREVER! We come in peace, shoot to kill. We do not know 1 millionth of one percent about anything. We do precision guesswork We don't fuckin' curse every other shitfaced word, dammit. We don't need no stinkin' badges - IRS We gave our organs to science and plan to do the same with our piano. We get to peel the tape off Wendy O. Williams after her concerts! We give nothing as willingly as our advice. We got the beat. We hack, crack, and pirate all sorts of Public Domain software. We have met the enemy and he is us. We have met the enemy and they is us. We have standards and expect you not to exceed them. We interrupt this quote for an important bulletin... We just joined the civil hair patrol!! We just joined the civil hair patrol!! We just kidnapped this BBS. Send 100 dollars, or else ! We just want the FAX ma'am... Keep the photo copier We just want the FAX ma'am...Keep the photo copier We look for things. Things that make us go. We look for things. Things that make us go. We make it up as we go along. We may be stupid . . . but we're not clever!-F & L We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing. We now return to our regularly scheduled flame-throwing. We now return you to your regular programming... We preserve our freedom using three boxes: ballot, jury, and cartridge. We shall say 'Ni' again to you..if you do not appease us. We taught Wilson Goode to enunciate here in Fuldelfya. We walk on like an elephant and back off like a giraffe. We want...a shrubbery... We'd sell out in an instant if someone was buying. We'll always have Paris. [Now, just where did I put it?] We're INNNSAAAAANE! Oh, wait. That's Crazy Eddie, isn't it? We're NOT gonna take it! We're SICK, SICK, SICK. But happy. We're as corrupt as any nation and we are calling the kettle black! We're bad...maybe not. We're good. Damned good. We're lost, but we're making good time. We're lost, but we're making good time. We're only immortal - for a limited time ... We're only immortal--for a limited time. -- Neil Peart We're only in it for the money! We're testing as QWK as we can We've been *there*, and found it boring... We've got OFFICIAL PERMISSION to do this. We've got a lot of books here, its a book shop! We've got a problem, HAL. We've got computers,we're tapping phone lines We've got computers,we're tapping phone lines. We've got quotes coming out of our A**, figuratively speaking. We've got to end this foolishness. We've recently learned where Dolly Parton buys her bras We've replaced the dilithium with Folgers Crystals! Weasels Ripped My Flesh! Weasels Ripped My Flesh! Wedding rings: The world's smallest handcuffs. Weinberg's First Law: Progress is made on alternate Fridays. Weird is a relative term - Frank N. Furter Weird, is a relative term - Frank N. Furter Welcome my son, welcome to the machine - PF Welcome to PA! State slogan: "Be Prepared to Stop" Welcome to my nightmare. Welcome to the Current Middle Ages! Welcome, gentle Sir Knight, to the Castle Anthrax! Well - it COULD happen...... Well I can't hear a thing! Let's go to the stoning. Well at least I think we are average Well at least I think we are average. Well done is better then well said. Well done is better then well said. Well feed me bran and call me irregular! Well she got her daddies car Well she got her daddies car. Well what is it you want? We want..... A SHRUBBERY!!!! Well, I did a backup three weeks ago... Well, I don't care what momma don't allow...... Well, I mean like,....you've SLEPT, with a lady.... Well, Ok, but just a QWKie... Well, excu-u-u-u-se me. Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords. Well, hey, it's the neighborly thing to do, ain't it? Well, is it better to burn out or fade away? Well, it looks better with the scope on calibrate Well, that's a lie...I DO bite... Well, whips and chains are Hardware, right? Well, why not? Well, you were warned. Well,I'll take whatever i want, and baby i want you. Were did my BSY flag go? Were going to make you IBM compatible HAL Weren't we here to drain the swamp? Wesley! Yes Sir? Get OFF my bridge! Wesley!" "Yes Sir?" "Get OFF my bridge! Wet: Midsummer Night's Dream Wha'so funny 'bout peace,love&understanding? Wha'so funny 'bout peace,love&understanding? Whad'ya mean I need a license to do that??! Whadya know? Not much, you? What Are You Looking For Down Here? What Are You Looking For Down Here? What Are You Looking For? Nothing's Here! What Bug! I left behind the roaches in New York! What CAN you get a nudist for Christmas? What I lack in restraint, I make up for in remorse. What I like about MS is its loyalty to customers! What IS a tagline anyway? What If We Were Our Reflection's Reflection? What REALLY killed Sid Vicious and Nancy Spungen. What a *senseless* waste of human life. What a booooring tagline... What a booooring tagline... What a coincidence! I've been there!!!! What a dog I got! His favorite bone is my LEG! What a fix we are in. Peace has been declared... What are fiends for? - R. Nixon What are fiends for? - R. Nixon What are you doing?!? The message is over,GO AWAY! What are you going to do with your life? What are you gonna do? Bleed on me? What are you out of your Vulcan mind? What are you staring at ? What are you trained to do? What aspect of _NO_ dont' you understand? What can I say? I'm awestruck. What can be put in a nutshell ought to stay there! What can you do at 3 AM? PSSSTTT - got a modem? What causes the holes in Swiss cheese? What do SHEEP dream of? What do mean you're not registered? What do we do now What do you mean I'm NUTS!!! What do you mean, lupins? What do you mean? You actually read this Tagline?!? What do you say to a one-legged hitchhiker? Hop in! What do you see when you turn out the light?? What do you want? Good Graphics or Good Taste. What does RU4692 Mean? Are you for 69 too? What does Worf need with a Starship..er..woman What does the Infantry call Airborne? Skeet Shoot!!! What does this do, Mr Woof? What ever you do, DON'T STEP IN IT! What follows 2 days of rain?????? - Monday What goes around, comes around. What good is knowledge if you don't share it? What happened to >100 Iraqi jets parked in Iran? What happened to my tagline? What happened to my tagline? What has 4 legs and an arm? A happy Pit Bull What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull What has four legs and an arm?......... A happy pit bull. What hope is there for the world if I die? What if I gave a .siggie and nobody cared? What if there were no hypothetical situations? What is Redneck foreplay? 'Get in the truck, bitch.' What is Redneck foreplay? (Nudge) Are you awake? What is is the was of what will be... What is the avg. air speed of an un-laden swallow? What is the color when black is burned. What is the output of a vacuum pump? What is the output of a vacuum pump? What is the sound of a bear sh*ting in the woods? What isn't tried won't work. What kind of 'kludge' is that, Dave? What kind of a problem, Dave? What made you think I like taglines? What mankind has been waiting for. What matters is not the length of the wand, but the magic in the stick. What me Worry? **-Alfred E. Neuman-** What me have a Virus.. Never! What more do you want? A T-Shirt? What part of my brilliance don't you understand? What the !@#$ are you supposed to put here? What the *HELL* is Fahrvegnugen? What the heck happened here??!! What the heck is that?????....is it contagious? What the large print giveth, the small print taketh away. What this country needs is a good 5 dollar plasma weapon. What this country needs is a good 5-cent nickle. What this country needs is a good five cent ANYTHING! What to do about ignorance & apathy? Who knows?Who cares? What universe is this, please? What was the best thing BEFORE sliced bread? What we have here is a failure to communicate What we have here is a failure to communicate! What we have here... Is a failure to accumulate.... Ernest P.W. What we need is Scratch N Sniff taglines! What we need is a Pizza Door and a Beer Door What were vices are now fashion. What you see is what you read What! did the Hand then of the Potter shake? What's Red and Swings? Baby on a Meat hook. What's a 6.9? 69 interrupted by a period. What's a 68? She goes down on you, and you owe her one. What's a Block? Is that like a Cement Block? What's a Grecian Urn? oh abouy $4.95 an hour What's another word for Thesaurus? What's black and taps on glass? Baby in a Microwave. What's tennis without a racket? What's that on top of the telly? Looks like a penguin. What's the Bag Limit on tourists these days, anyway? What's the difference between 'ooh' and 'aah'? About 4 inches! What's the point spread on WWIII? - R.Reagan What's the point spread on WWIII? - R.Reagan What's this loose cable doin #%*#-4@@% NO CARRIER What's this pretty little red button do? BEEP! What's worse then a politician is a child molester. What's worth doing is worth doing for money. What's worth doing is worth doing for money. What's, blond,brown,blond,brown,blond? A cheerleader doing cartwheels. What, us .BATs? V^^^\_o^o_/^^^V What,me worry??..........Alfred E. Bush What... Me Worry? What...is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow? What...is the capital of Assyria? What? Me worry? I have a backup.....somewhere..... What?!? DOSSHELL *isn't* supposed to be a joke? Whatever it is - I'm against it! Whatever you do, you'll regret it. Whatever you do, you'll regret it. Whats a Grecian urn? Oh, about 20 drachmas an hour. Whats this big red ke........................ Whats yellow&points North? a Magnetic banana Whatsa matter Colonel Sanders.......CHICKEN? When DOS grows up it wants to be OS/2! When Guns are Outlawed on the Government will have Guns! When I die, I'm leaving my body to science fiction. When I get older, losing my hair, many years from now... When I grow up -- I want to be a Politician When Puns are outlawed, only outlaws will have Puns When a man lies he murders part of the world When a poor man eats a chicken -- one of them is sick. When a room shakes, Californians instinctively look up. When a sage is angry, he is no longer a sage. When all are one and one is all ... When all else fails, PANIC! When all else fails, call Forsberg at home! When all else fails, follow instructions. When all else fails, follow instructions. When all else fails, read the instructions. When all else fails, read the manual. When all else fails, read the manual. When all else fails, use the defaults! When all you got's a hammer, every problem becomes a nail When can I give DOS the boot? When concrete shakes beneath thee, one has found a true sub-woofer. When cows laugh, does milk come out of their nose? When did my wild oats turn to shredded wheat? When en en Guns are Outlawed on the Government will have Guns! When fishing for Pike , make sure you have a " chub-on "! When grasping at straws, any straw will do. When in Poland do as Poles do. When in doubt ... try a novel approach! When in doubt, delegate. When in doubt, do as the doubters do. When in doubt, do what the President does, guess When in doubt, mumble, when in trouble, delegate." When in doubt, mumble. When in doubt, mumble. When in doubt, press Ctrl-Alt-Del. When in doubt, press Ctrl-Alt-Del. When in doubt, shroud your spout. When in doubt, tell the truth M. Twain When in doubt, truncat When in doubt, use a bigger hammer. When in doubt, whip it out!!! When is a mouse a rat? When it eats memory! When is a mouse a rat? When it eats memory! When it comes to giving, some people stop at nothing. When it's up to your ears, keep your mouth shut! When no flags flew, where no army stood When nothing else will do. When puns are outlawed only outlaws will have puns When puns are outlawed only outlaws will have puns. When somone on trial tells the truth a lawyer objects! When talking nonsense try not to be serious. When talking nonsense try not to be serious. When the Gods want to punish us, they give us what we want. When the fun and games are over, the serious foolishness starts. When the going gets tough... The tough go drinking. When the going gets weird the weird turns Pro When the going gets weird, the weird travels. When theres no problem,you've overlooked something When they're down.......KICK 'EM!!!!!! When things just can't get any worse, they will. When was your last 40 second orgasm??? SKYDIVE!! When we think, life thinks. When wine goes in, secrets come out. When wine goes in, secrets come out. When you are over the hill, you pick up speed... When you go far enough, you'll meet yourself. When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy. When you pass the buck, don't expect to get change back! When you run out of time you run out of everything. When you vote in `92 remember: Saddam has a job, How about you? When your argument is weak tell the 'BIG LIE' Whenever you use a jump, be sure of your destination Where Crazy Eddie gets HIS T-shirts." Where Gary Hart REALLY spends his weekends. Where Great Grandmother posted her bulletins. Where NOTHING is sacred anymore. Where O where did my tagline go O where O wh Where O where did my tagline go O where O wh Where Time has no meaning. Where all the Masochists go to get abused. Where am I? Operator trace this call. Where any such silliness remains unchecked. Where anything can happen, but usually doesn't. Where are we going? And why am I in this hand basket? Where bribes are cheerfully accepted. Where can I buy the Chia-pet computer ?? Where did THIS guy come from? Where do all the infinitesimals go? Where do broken hard disks go? Where do you find 100 talking invertebrates? The US Senate Where does he get all those marvelous toys? - Bush Where does it go when you flush? Where everyone knows everything about nothing. Where intellectual giants come to frolic...it's a pity they never post. Where is Ed and the $20 million? Where is the ANY key when you want it. Where it is *always* time to make the doughnuts. Where it's still 'We the people,' right? Where keeping crumbs out of the keyboard is an art-form. Where mind and spirit come together and have a real good time. Where nothing is simple, except for some of the users. Where oil and water DO mix, dammit! Where service isn't just a word; it's a noun. Where sex and fun are spelled the same way. Where the $#!/& IS Carmen San-Diego??? Where the 60's never really ended. Where the Pentagon buys its toilet paper. Where the Sex Pistols learned to play. Where the beat goes on...*Boom-shaka-laka-boom-boom-boom..* Where the fun never stops. Never starts, either. Where the heck is the key?? Where the heck is the key?? Where the intelligence is high, and the moustaches are cheesy. Where the keyboard is mightier than the sword. Where the majority maintains that brevity is the best means to ... Where the message base is in 3D. Where there is light, there are bugs. Where there's a will ... there's a relative. Where there's a will, there's a happy Lawyer! Where there's a will, there's a probate Where there's a will, there's a won't. Where there's a witch, there's a way Where there's smoke, there's toast Where two wrongs don't make a right, but they make us feel real good. Where two wrongs don't make a right, but three do. Where we put stupid and offensive quotes up, just for you! Where were YOU the night of Nov 22, 1963? Where will you spend eternity? Heaven or Hell? Where you can talk to people without using up saliva. Where you stand on an issue depends on where you sit. Where you treasure is, there your heart will be also. Where's the ANY key? Where's the brake on this thing? Where'z dat Waskally Wabbit! Wherever I go, there I am. Wherever I go, there I am. Wherever I go, thereereere I am, Pooh mused. Wherever you've been...you're not there NOW! Wherewedon'tcareifyoudon'tleaveaspacebetweenyourwords. Which is the non-smoking lifeboat? Which is the non-smoking lifeboat? While (!cat) play (mouse); While you're undressing Venus, dress up your penis. Whip me, beat me, make me a SYSOP Whip me, beat me, make me write bad software. Whip me, beat me, make me write bad software. Who cares anyway. Who has the USSR's BIOWAR contagious snake bite virus? Who in the world is Carmen San Diego? Who invented Taglines anyway??? What a waste! Who is Dr. Who? Who is actually sponsoring this message? Who needs comedians? Journalists are much more laughable! Who needs drugs? I go broke buying Sci-Fi! Who needs drugs? I go broke buying Sci-Fi! Who needs more than 1024K? -Megan Byte Who said TV is a vast wasteland? Who said TV is a vast wasteland? Who said that sex wasn't fun ?? Who sez Amelhicans are rhazy? Who teach- don't know. Who know- don't teach. Who teach- don't know. Who know- don't teach. Who the heck reads taglines anyway? Who ya gonna call? ECHO BUSTERS! Who ya gonna call?.....**** Virus Busters **** !!! Who! - me worry? Who's Dick Hertz? Who-ho-ho!! This is no Tupperware party! Who? Me worry? Whoever dies with the most toys... is still dead! Whore House: You F**k 'em, we'll suck 'em! Whos Jim Varney?, he asked earnestly? Whosinsane? SADDAM, that's who! Why are these athletic shoe salesmen following me?? Why are we here? Because we are here. Roll the bones Why are you carrying that fish around? For the halibut.. Why are you wasting time reading taglines? Why are you wasting time reading taglines? Why be NoRmAl? Why be anyone else when you can be me? Why buy Cologne when you can wipe a magazine on you. Why buy shampoo when real poo is still free? Why call them back from heaven? Why call them back from heaven? Why can't I say 'Big Hard Disk' in echomail? Why can't life have a "Snooze" button? Why can't women put the toilet seat BACK UP ! Why can't women remember to put the seat back up? Why did he ask me that&Does he know something Why did he ask me that&Does he know something Why do I do these things to myself? Why do I do this? Money, lots and lots of money. Why do I have to Work for a living? Why do I run a BBS? Because I'm an IDIOT! Why do politicians think it's federal money? Why do tornadoes only hit trailer parks? Why do we do it? WE DON'T KNOW! Why does bread always fall butter side down? Why does bread always fall butter side down? Why does this guy use all these damned ellipses? Why don't cats like to swim? Why don't cats like to swim? Why drive a Volkswagen when you can have a Rolls Royce? Why fart and waste it when you could burp and taste it? Why give the temperature of the airport??? No one lives there... Why is "ABBREVIATION" such a long word? Why is it good to be rational? Why is it that the best taglines are always much too lon Why is it that the best taglines are too lon Why is there a watermelon in here? Why is there a watermelon in here? Why is there an expiration date on sour cream???? Why is your nose black? Your snorting laser toner? Why isn't phonetically spelled that way? Why look thru Windows? Open the door to the future: OS/2 Why not REPLY and make this person happy!! Why not just press enter for a few days? Why not? Why put off till tomorrow what you'll never do anyway? Why should I add to my troubles by facing reality? Why should I read? Its only words. Why should I read? Its only words. Why stop now, just when I'm hating it? Why stop now, just when I'm hating it? Why the heck are you wasting yer time reading a tagline? Why training bras? What can we teach them. Why use a big, long word when a diminutive one will do ? Why use shampoo when so much real poo is free? Why waltz when you can ROCK AND ROLL????? Why wasn't I born rich instead of beautiful? Why won't this dang thing work? Why would a Woodchuck want to chuck wood anyway? Why's the alphabet in that order? Because of that song? Why, I oughta ... ! Why, he's no fun, he fell right over! Wife who puts husband in dog house, often finds him in cat house. Wife who slides down banister, makes monkey shine. Wife's a bitch - then you die. Wile E. Coyote... Super genius Will I dream? - HAL-9000 Will Rogers never met Saddam Hussein. Will it ever end? Will that be cache or chkdsk? Will you come quietly, or shall I use ear plugs? Win-DOZE: The solution to a problem that didn't exist. Win3.1? For fast relief call 800-3-IBM-OS2. Windows 3 - the MAC for the rest of us! Windows 3.0 - The colorful clown suit for DOS. Windows 3.0 : Microsoft's ode to P. T. Barnum Windows 3.0: More holes than you can count. Windows 3: Solution to a non-existent problem.... Windows Error: 002 No error . . . yet. Windows Error: 002 No error, yet. Windows LUW: Life Under Windows Windows NT: From the makers of Windows 3.0! Windows NT: Vapourware of the desperate and scared. Windows NT? New Technology? I don't think so... Windows UCR: Unrecoverable Customers Resources Windows UKD: Unexplained Keyboard Destructions Windows UMP: Unjustified Microsoft Profits Windows UMT: Unstoppable Mouse Trajectories Windows UPB: Unrecoverable Pain in the Butt Windows has crashed more systems than Stoned Windows is a False Prophet - Vodka is the True Messiah Windows is to OS/2 what Etch-a-Sketch is to art. Windows is to speed what the Abacus is to Calculus Windows isn't a virus: viruses do something! Windows isn't crippleware: it's "Fuctionally Challenged" Windows turned my 386 into a 10 Mhz XT ! Windows would be better with curtains. Windows: A View to be Killed. Windows: From the folks who brought you EDLIN! Windows: From the people who brought you EDLIN! Windows: Just another pane in the glass. Windows: Just another pane in the glass. Windows: The CP/M of the future! Windows: The Gates of hell. Windows: an Unrecoverable Acquisition Error! Windows? Homey don't play that! Windows? WINDOWS?!? Hahahahahehehehehohohoho... Windows? We don't need no stinking Windows! Windoze, is changing....it's getting poorer faster! Windws is ine for bckgroun comunicaions Winners never quit and quitters never win. Winter is Natures way of saying, "Up Yours!" Winter is Natures way of saying, Up Yours! Wire Puller: (n), A seasoned 1004 programmer Wire Puller: (n), A seasoned 1004 programmer Wisdom is knowing what to do with what you know. Wise men still seek the Lord Jesus !!! Witches ride brooms because Nature abhors a vacuum With a modem, I can take on the world! With friends like these, who needs to hallucinate? With friends like these, who needs to hallucinate? With one foot in his mouth he stated, Hmmmm, emmmm woooo hhhhcccchh. With schizophrenia you're never alone! Without BBSes, life itself would be impossible. Without Time Everything Would Happen At Once! Without fools there would be no wisdom. Without fools there would be no wisdom. Without ice cream life and fame are meaningless Wobbles, but it won't fall down. Woking on water is dangerous. Woman who go to man's apartment for snack, may get tit bit. Woman who spends much time on bedsprings, may have offsprings. Woman's virtue is man's greatest invention Woman.zip -- Great program , but NO documentation! Women DO come with instructions! Ask Them! Women and elephants never forget an injury. Women are great! Every man should own one!!!!! Women are just systems, & a smart man keeps a backup Women are like programs. A smart man keeps a backup. :) Women do come with instructions, ask them! Women fake orgasm, Men fake foreplay. Women prefer the simple things in life...MEN Women speak two languages-One of which is verbal Women, who seek to be equal to men, lack ambition !! Wonderful!! Simply Wonderful!! Woof! Gasp! Choke! yes, I do have people telling me all the time Woozers, The damn'd thing actually works ! WordPerfect isn't, Pagemaker doesn't, etc., etc., etc.... Words 'R Us Words must be weighed, not counted. Words, 25 ea. Better quality words, 50 ea. Wordstar users - Ctrl-KQ to you, too. Worf, Eat any good books lately? Worf, you look like the inertial dampeners failed. Work expands to exceed the time allotted. Work is just something to do between breaks Work to become, not to acquire. - Confucius Work, is a four letter word. Workersoftheworldunite. Working the BLEEDING edge of technology !!! World ends - details after the game World ends at 3pm; details at 5.... World's First Parallel Processed Human Being. Worry casts a huge shadow on a small problem. Worry is as effective as shoveling smoke. Worth two hands in the bush. Would a Muslim vampire be scared of the Koran? Would it give you a lot of pleasure? Zaphod. Would you buy a Pontiac from this, er, man? Would you buy a Pontiac from this, er, man? Would you like me to sing you a song? Would you stand up and walk out on me?? Wow! It IS raining cats and dogs! I'm outta here. Wrap it in foil, before checking her oil. Wrap that rascal -- Use write protect tabs. Write all complaints legibly -> [ ] Write right With Xywrite Write your complaints in this box -----> [] Writer's Rule #1: Have something to say! Writing a good LSAT was the start of my decline Wwaaayyyyyyyyyyy Cooool Junior... XRS! - You've got the right one baby! Uh HUH!! XRS'ing at XT's Suck! XX + XY = Oh, Sir Jasper. Xerox never comes up with anything original. Xerox your lunch and file it under "sex offenders!" Xerox, all they ever do is copy. Xerox...all they ever do is copy. XpReSsing myself as usual ... Xpress Yourself! Xywrite: Not For Corporate Types ! Let 'em eat WP ! Xywrite: The Intelligent Writer's Choice YES! We Deliver... Open 24HRS! YES! You may have already won....... YES!! eh, NO!!! oh, well MAYBE!!!!!!!! YES!! eh, NO!!! oh, well MAYBE!!!!!!!! YES, Cherry is my real name! YOW!! Everybody out of the GENETIC POOL!" Ya want a stupid answer? Ask me anything! Ya'll come back now ya hear. Ya.. But if it worked 1st time.. What fun would it be? Yah better reply to this one ya flea bitt'n varmint!! Yakkety yak.. y'all come back now.. ya hear? Yawning at X-rated movie: Indecent composure. Ye shall know them by their taglines. Yea, verily do many strange things come to be. Yea, yea..once a hobby, now an expensive addiction! Yeah, I'm a hi-skool grajuit... wanna make somthin outta it? Yeah, but my mother-in-law is MEANER than YOURS. Yeah, but she was only a little bit pregnant! Yeah, but she was only a little bit pregnant! Yeah, maybe we ARE apathetic, but we Just Don't Care. Yeah, uh, that's the ticket!..... Yeah... THAT's the ticket! Yeah... THAT's the ticket! Years, education and understanding offtimes are foes. Yep! you bet... What was that you said? Yer motherboard wears combat reboots Yes Dear, I'll Get Off The Computer In Just A Minute Yes folks, a FREE tagline Yes perhaps You Know St. Murphy Yes, God has a sense of humor! I'm here, ain't I? Yes, I admit, *I* steal taglines!?!?! Yes, I know I'm off topic. Yes, I know I'm off topic. Yes, I know I'm still off topic. Yes, I know I'm still off topic. Yes, I'm in a very GUMBY mood today. Yes, I'm in a very GUMBY mood today. Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed. Yes, but I came here for an argument!! Yes, but did you read the REALLY fine print? Yes, but did you read the REALLY fine print? Yes, in scene 4 we vaporize the actor and ... Yes, in scene 4 we vaporize the actor and ... Yes, the Python works; my Volvo has never been stolen. Yes, the lizard works; my Volvo has never been stolen. Yes, you must give us all a good spanking!! Yesterday, I worried about tomorrow and today all is well Yield to temptation..it may be your only chance! You =know= what I am thinking... You Are This BBS's Most Appreciated Caller. You Bet Your ASCII You Can Tell An Owner By Its Cat. You Can Tell An Owner By Its Cat. You Can Tell An Owner By Its Dog. You Cannot Escape! Resistance Is Futile! You DIDN'T hear it from me! You GOTS to be kidding! You GOTS to be kidding! You are IT! Really now... I'm not kidding here... You are getting sleepy... you are getting very sleepy... You are here ---------------------> * You are in a maze of twisty little directories, all alike You are in a maze of twisty subroutines, all alike. You are the Virus. You have the power to Multiply. You are under arrest for tagline theft! You been bungy jumping with a cord that was a bit long? You bought a VCR because wrestling is on the same time as BINGO? You call this fun? --McCoy You can always break glass with a sledgehammer. You can be my < WingMan > at any time! You can disagree without being disagreeable. You can have peace. Or you can have freedom: LL You can lead a horticulture, but you can't make her think You can lead a man to ponder; you cannot make him think. You can log off any time you like, but you can never leave. You can observe a lot just by watching. You can observe a lot just by watching. You can plug in Virtually anywhere You can prick your finger, but don't finger your prick. You can relax now. He's not coming. You can see a lot just by observing. Yogi Bera You can sentence her to watching old movies??? You can stop reading now, I've finished my message You can't MobyTurbo with an internal Z! You can't be first, but you can be next. You can't fool me--there ain't no sanity clause. You can't get out more than you put in You can't go wrong, if you shield your dong. You can't have everything. Where would you put it? You can't roller skate in a buffalo herd.... You can't teach an old dogma new tricks. You can't teach an old dogma new tricks. You can't un-melt a snowflake... You can't un-melt a snowflake... You can't win. You can't break even. You can't even quit. You cannot dry dishes with a wet towel You cannot kill time without injuring eternity You could do better, but why bother? You did WHAT with TurboTax??? OMG!! You don't buy beer, you rent it... You don't get it boy, this is an operating table. You don't have to be intelligent to use it but it helps. You don't have to worry about that: it's virtual! You don't have to worry about that: it's virtual! You don't need to be a cannibal to be fed up with people. You dont buy beer, you rent it... You fight with the strength of many men, sir knight. You fool! That's the History Eraser Button!!! You go to heaven....God sneezes... What do you say? You got a problem kid ?... ---celenza You got any more taglines I can plagiarize ? You have been selected for a secret mission. You have the right to remain silent.... You hold 'em off, I'll go for help. (heh-heh-heh) You just can't beat cubic inches. You just contradicted me! You kill my father. Prepare to die. You knew the job was dangerous when you took it! You know us Sysops, It's always the other guys fault ;-) You know you're a Redneck if. You call your father 'Uncle Dad'. You know you're dieting when postage stamps taste good. You know, names aren't magic. They are merely handles. You know...in a hundred years I just might get to like you. You live and learn. Or you don't live long. You lost WHAT source code? You made a woman MEOW? You made my head explode. You make it we take it. You may steal THIS tag, but you can't get my whole file! You mean I can send mail to myself? You misunderstood. Bush ACTUALLY said 'No nude Texans.' You never act da way ya should & I like it You never act da way ya should & I like it. You never knew what you were missing. You paid cover to get in here. HA! You said Windows was a Power Tool??? You see what I'm sayin'? You see, but you do not observe. - Sir Arthur Conan You send `em to school ... they eat the books. You shall know the truth and be freed. You shall know the truth, and it shall make you odd. You swallowed a WHAT? You think paying an expert is expensive? Try an amateur! You think that's bad? You think that's bad? You think you have problems? My sundial is running slow. You think you have troubles? My sundial is slow. You want it when ?? You want me to clean what??? You want to smell my WHAT? You were s'posed to laugh! You were told not to feed me after midnight! You will always find something in the last place you look. You will be tested on the above material! You will be told about it tomorrow. You will have good luck and over come hardships. You will spend the rest of your life in the future. You won first prize..! Send me $50. and I'll send your prize! You'd think there were ENOUGH quotes, already... You'd think we'd be tired of this by now, but what do YOU know. You'll come a waltzin' matilda with me.... You'll get what's coming to you.. Unless it's mailed. You'll know when your ready for it. You'll never get there and if you do, you won't know. You'll never get to heaven if you pay a lawyer. You'll pay to know what you really think! You're Never Alone With Schizophrenia. You're a Redneck if: Your beltbuckle is heavier than 4 lbs. You're a Redneck if: Your entertained by a 6-pack and a bug-zapper. You're a Redneck if: Your porch collapses and more than 3 dogs die. You're a better man than I, Rin Tin Tin. You're a funny guy! - Goodfellas You're a glutton for punishment? :) You're a lapsed atheist, dear. You're all insane and trying to steal my magic bag You're born single, profit from the experience You're dead in this town, fella. You're driving me to nervous prostitution! You're driving me to nervous prostitution! You're not going into a song while I'm here! You're only as old as you feel.. the next day You're so vain I bet you think this tagline's about you. You're soaking in it You're the reason my dog is pregnant, aren't you?! You're throwing it all out the Windows! You've been smoking that stuff again, uh? You've been smoking that stuff again, uh? You've gotta love it, though you don't have to respect it the next day. Your Freudian slip is showing. Your Lucky Color Is Fading. Your Mother is a Ferrengi Ho! Your Virus is now STONED. Legalize ViruScan Your average mind numbing, brain-blowing experience. Your bootsector is being destroyed! Your cart just ran over my dogma. Your cat just ran over my dog. Your code will not compile cleanly as written. Your computer does what????? Your computer does what????? Your computer will self-destruct in 5 seconds Your computer will self-destruct in 5 seconds. Your crt is 2 loud. turn it down! Your epidermis is showing! Your family tree has no branches. Your foot, Your mouth, ....Go arrange a meeting. Your hair's thinning - Who wants fat hair? Your house has no curtains, but your pick-up truck does Your idea of safe sex is a pillow covering the head-board. Your inlaws on your wife's side usually are ... Your karma just ran over my dogma Your karma just ran over my dogma. Your lucky number has been discontinued. Your mother's gonna LOVE me! Your mother's gonna LOVE me! Your not hearing what I'm saying. Your piss poor planning is not necessarily my emergency! Your so out to lunch you make me hungry. Your tagline here. $15.95/mo. Sorry, no C.O.D.'s Your, uh, your wife, does she go, eh, does she go, eh? Youth Culture Killed My Dog. Yow! Yow! Am I having fun yet? Yow! Are we laid back yet? Yow! Are we wet yet? Yoyodyne Propulsions Sys,Inc - The 7th Dimension + Beyond ZENOCIDE: The killing of ancient philosophers ZIPidy do Da, ARCidy Day . . . ZMODEM has bigger bits, softer blocks, and tighter ASCII Zap! Zen Druids practice Transcendental Vegetation. Zippy says: [] my job. [] my boss. I'm self employed! [ This quote intentionally left blank ] . [.siggie soon to be revamped.... construction up ahead---slow down :-) ] [Aries, Gemini Rising & Aquarius moon -- pulled three ways, no waiting] []<-- Put complaints in this box. [sigh] Nostalgia just isn't what it used to be ... _____net---keep out of the reach of children! behind you deny thy father and forget thy . ebius . This is a moebius . This is a mo ... ifyoucanreadthisyou'retooclose sdnah ruoy no emit hcum oot evah uoy siht daer nac uoy fI ywercs lla og tsuj sgniht semitemoS { Rule 62 A Rule To Live By } {Paste here} ~%~%~%~%~%~%~%~ HAPPY HOLIDAYS!! ~%~%~%~%~%~%~%~ 't b sv WH BTHR aissez es Bon Temps Roull, I smell good times BABY ON BOARD -just means five more points <- Scratch here to reveal prize.... ôy! Ƶr's ո pbC ̹ոr \ \/y Co