Copyright 1995(c) 
 
                                GUESS AGAIN 
                           A Ruby Begonia Column 
                              By Del Freeman 
 
     "Look at these people!" said an irritated Ruby. 
     "Looks normal to me," said Del. "There are about 25 or so 
senators sitting around, one of them is asking questions and the
rest are holding up their chins with their hands." 
     "I ain't payin' for that!" Ruby protested. "Let 'em raft on
their own time." 
     "Raft?" asked Del. 
     "Thass what this is all about, dummy -- rafting down them 
foamy streams. It's called white water. Jeez, if you don't know 
about that, bungee-jumping's really gonna blow your mind," said 
Ruby. 
     "This is not about rafting, Ruby. This is about a possible 
cover-up following the suicide of the President's counsel." 
     "Listen, this is just nuts. These people is asking this 
telescope salesman all sorts a questions about what some other guy
might'a thought. Now I just don't see no crystal ball in the 
telescope salesman's hand, do you?" Ruby waited for an answer. 
     "This is the government," said Del, "and the man is Webster
Hubbell. He does not sell telescopes. He sells what lawyers sell.
And these people are obligated not to make any practical sense 
while looking important. They're politicians." 
     "Well, I just ain't payin' 'em for that, that's all," said 
Ruby. 
     "It's their job, Ruby. In the whole of the world there are 
people who do things and other people who watch them and try to 
figure out why. It is the way of things," said Del. 
     "So what you're tellin' me is that I can be either a doer or
a watcher an' that's all," said Ruby. 
     "In the halls of public service? Yes," said Del. 
     "Okay, I made a choice. Where do I sign up to watch?" asked
Ruby. "An' get paid, of course. I wanna' get paid." 
     "Don't we all? The thing is, you have to run for office to get
one of these cushy jobs," said Del. 
     "I'll run," said Ruby. "No prob." 
     "And you have to get elected," said Del. 
     "Shoot, I can watch as good as the next guy, can't I?" Ruby
demanded. 
     "The point is not to watch, Ruby. These senators are trying
to get at the truth of what happened. You will notice that they all
have earnest expressions on their faces when they ask these 
questions," said Del. 
     "I can look earnest," said Ruby, looking earnest. "I can watch
and look earnest and hold up my chin with my hand," she said, doing
so. "I got all the qualifications. Maybe this is what I was 
supposed to do with my talents all along," she said. 
     "And the questions?" asked Del. 
     "That's the easiest part," said Ruby. "I am the world's best
second guesser." 
     "Then, I think you've found your dream job." 
 
                                   -30-