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["A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.",null]
["A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.",null]
["A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.",null]
["A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer.  --  Ralph Waldo Emerson",null]
["A man always has two reasons for what he does - a good one and the real one.  --  J.P. Morgan",null]
["A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.",null]
["According to the laws of aerodynamics the bumble bee cannot fly.  I guess no one bothered to tell the bee.",null]
["Be nice to people on your way up because you'll need them on your way down.",null]
["Breeding rabbits is a hare raising experience.",null]
["Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.",null]
["Children seldom misquote you.  In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.",null]
["Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?",null]
["Efficiency is intelligent laziness.",null]
["Every successful person has had failures, but repeated failure is no guarantee of eventual success.",null]
["Faith is the quality that enables you to eat blackberry jam on a picnic without looking to see whether the seeds move.",null]
["Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.",null]
["Good judgement comes from experience; and experience, well, that comes from bad judgement.",null]
["He who laughs last didn't get the joke.",null]
["If A = B and B = C, then A = C, except where void or prohibited by law.",null]
["If Adam and Eve were alive today, they would probably sue the snake.  --  Bern Williams",null]
["If practice makes perfect, and nobody's perfect, why practice?",null]
["If there were no one to watch them drive by, how many people would buy a Mercedes?",null]
["If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.",null]
["If, while you are in school, there is a shortage of qualified personnel in a particular field, then by the time you graduate with the necessary qualifications, that field's employment is glutted.",null]
["In case of atomic attack, the federal ruling against prayer in schools will be temporarily canceled.",null]
["It is better to remain silent and thought a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt.",null]
["It is impossible to make anything foolproof, because fools are so ingenious.",null]
["It is now proved beyond doubt that smoking is one of leading causes of statistics.",null]
["Life is like riding a bicycle.  You don't fall off unless you stop peddling.",null]
["Misfortune:  The kind of fortune that never misses.",null]
["Never tell people how to do things.  Tell them what to do, and they will surprise you with their ingenuity.",null]
["Pedestrians never seem to realize that they are a threat to the safety of cars.",null]
["Pro is to con as progress is to Congress.",null]
["Real knowledge is to know the extent of ones ignorance.",null]
["Resting on one's laurels makes for an uncomfortable bed, and only crushes the laurels.",null]
["Stress!  The confusion created when the mind must override the body's basic desire to choke the living daylights out of some idiot who desperately deserves it.",null]
["Television is an invention that permits you to be entertained in your living room by people you wouldn't have in your home.",null]
["Temper is what gets most of us into trouble.  Pride is what keeps us there.",null]
["The ladder of life is full of splinters, but they always prick hardest when you're sliding down.",null]
["The shortest distance between two points is under construction.",null]
["The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain.  --  Dolly Parton",null]
["There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy...  --  Ambrose Bierce",null]
["There are two kinds of people: those who do the work and those who take the credit.  Try to be in the first group - there is lest competition there.  --  Indira Gandhi",null]
["Too many of us are spending money we haven't earned to buy things we don't need to impress people we don't like.",null]
["We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations.",null]
["We were given two ends - one to sit on and the other to think with.  Success depends on which one we use the most.",null]
["When a man tells you that he got rich through hard work, ask him: `whose?'  --  Don Marquis",null]
["Where there's a will, there's an inheritance tax.",null]
["While your friend holds you affectionately by both your hands you are safe, for you can watch both of his.",null]
["You wouldn't be worried about what people think of you if you knew how seldom they actually do.",null]